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1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't...

Hollywood Squares: These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.. Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat? A. Paul Lynde...

GARDEN SNAKES CAN BE DANGEROUS Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes - and here is why. A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them...

Old but funny- <object width="425" height="350"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wBfmjromhhk"></param> <param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param> <embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wBfmjromhhk" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425"...

Oldie But Goodie <object width="425" height="350"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/bBa0blUoE8U"></param> <param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param> <embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/bBa0blUoE8U" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425"...

Skinny little white Irishman goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little Irishman staring at him, he looks down and says: '7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pounds of testicles - Turner Brown.' The little white Irishman...

<object width="425" height="350"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/3_Jt_g10Jug"></param> <param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param> <embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/3_Jt_g10Jug" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350">...

CURTAIN RODS --- She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft...

May be old - but good Doing Your Part As An American Citizen: A Texas rancher whose ranch backs up to the Rio Grande river, reported this morning: "At about 8:30 this morning, I saw a Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grande River . He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and...

This is from a January report but with an update - if you haven't seen it.... See original story here: Anti-gun Senator Shoots Intruder See the latest (11/16/2010) about State Senator Soles' demise: State Senator Soles Turns Himself Into Autorities (A hearty Tip O'The Hat to Mr. A.G...

Watch the wheelchair guy - the rest are cool but this guy has balls! <object width="425" height="350"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Vo0Cazxj_yc"></param> <param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param> <embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Vo0Cazxj_yc"...

<span style="font-weight: bold">Happy 235th Birthday Marines!</span>

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis,does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? WITNESS: How would I know...

Can you make it to level 20? Curve Ball

Remember, you only have to graze the target, not land on it. Change the power by keeping the cursor closer to or farther away from the canon. Ragdoll Canon

"Not Drunk" I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my wife to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the sink, or else... I said I would and proceeded with the unpleasant task. I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink...

Roller Coaster

Physics Hate Away......I'm hunting the guy that sent me this link.....

Just got this in an email and thought I'd pass it on you you guys. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A special message from: Lieutenant General (U.S. Army, ret) William G. Boykin Dear Patriotic American, We live in strategic times. Our...

Difference Between a Marine Officer And an NCO A young Marine officer was severely wounded in the head by a grenade, but the only visible permanent injury was to both of his ears, which were amputated. Since his hearing wasn't impaired he remained in the Marine Corps. Many years later he...