Maggie’s 10 Reasons why men prefer rifles over Women

[He Shoot Me]

I'm guessing this has been posted before, but it got a chuckle out of me.

<span style="font-weight: bold">The Top Ten Reasons Men Prefer Rifles Over Women </span>


#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9. You can keep one Rifle at home and have

another for when you're on the road.

#8. If you admire a friend's Rifle and tell him so,

he will probably let you try it out a few times..

#7. Your primary Rifle doesn't mind if you keep

another Rifle for a backup.

#6. Your Rifle will stay with you even

if you run out of ammo.

#5. A Rifle doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4. Rifles function normally every day of the month.

#3. A Rifle doesn't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2. A Rifle doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the number one reason a Rifle is favored over a woman:

#1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A RIFLE

-Pat

 

[Shibumi]

Re: 10 Reasons why men prefer rifles over Women

Classic...must print out and leave in the kitchen for my wife...after dinner!

 

[Lindy]

Re: 10 Reasons why men prefer rifles over Women

Why SCUBA diving is better than sex:

1. In the long run its cheaper
2. You can dive with your buddy
3. Bringing crustaceans back with you is optional
4. You can sink anything in the sea
5. You can shift anchor anytime you want
6. You can dive safely with a complete stranger
7. Neoprene is warmer than Latex
8. You can almost always have multiple dives in one day
9. You can dive a frigid sea
10. You can dive the quarry and the sea doesn't get jealous
11. The sea is always wet
12. You can dive anytime of the month
13. You can enter the sea backwards
14. Your wetsuit is never too big for you, even when its cold
15. The bigger the cave the better
16. You can piss in your wetsuit
17. It smells less fishy
18. The only time the sea will take your beach cottage is during a
hurricane
19. You can almost always get a dive at 5:00 in the morning
20. Dreaming about diving doesn't ruin the sheets

 

[GardDog]

Re: 10 Reasons why men prefer rifles over Women

Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. You can enjoy a beer all month long.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. Beer stains wash out.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play baseball/soccer/basketball/etc.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Beer is never late.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
7. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
8. Hangovers go away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
9. Beer labels come off without a fight.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
11. Beer never has a headache.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer on your breath.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
15. A beer always goes down easy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
16. You can have more than one beer in a night and not feel guilty.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
17. You can share a beer with your friends.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
19. Beer is always wet.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
20. Beer doesn't demand equality.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
21. You can have a beer in public.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
22. A beer doesn't care when you come.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
23. A frigid beer is a good beer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
25. If you change beers, you don't have to pay alimony.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
26. Good beer costs less than good women.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
27. A beer doesn't change its mind after you've taken off its top.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
28. Beer doesn't expect an hour of foreplay before satisfying you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
29. A beer looks as good in the morning as it did when the bar closed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30. You can't get thrown in jail for having a beer under the grandstand at halftime.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
31. Afterwards, a beer won't feel guilty, cry, propose, call her mother, your ex-wife or her therapist.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Beer never bugs you to have little beers.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. If your preference for a type of beer changes, you don't have to get involved with lawyers.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Beers don't want a lasting relationship.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. A beer doesn't make you sleep onthe couch after you've taken six other beers on a picnic.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. After you've put your lips to a beer, a beer never asks, "What are you doing?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Finishing a beer in 3 seconds is something to be proud of.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. You can have a beer on your lunch hour.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. A beer never wants to stay up afterwards talking about respect.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
32. A beer won't slap you in the face for putting it between your legs at a drive-in movie.

 

[chadg]

Re: 10 Reasons why men prefer rifles over Women