Amusing True Stories

[Milf Dots]

A combat veteran in his early 80s at the time, God rest his soul, was tilting the refrigerator forward so his wife could dust the top of it... While holding the fridge his pants fell down and as he looked down at his pants around his ankles- a container of flour slid off the top of the fridge and dumped flour all over his head and shoulders. His wife was of no help because she couldn't stop laughing. This actually happened.

 

[lonegunman762x51]

The state of Wisconsin has over 12,000 voters who have been registered to vote for more than 100 years. They all voted for Biden in the last election. I'm not saying there is voter fraud but that means they have 12,000 people over 118 years old. It is especially amazing since only 4 people on the entire fucking earth lived to be 118 or older before now.

The oldest voter in Wayne County Michigan/Detroit was born in 1849. He/she was one of several thousand voters born in the 19th century who have bene voting recently. This is amazing for many reasons. One in particular is that he is more than 50 years older than any other human on earth. Naturally he voted Democratic,

These are the 81 million who love Pedo-Joe.

 

[Milf Dots]

A veteran who was a retired Philly PD Captain, in his 70s at the time, God rest his soul, was standing on a dining room table so he could dust the chandelier for his wife, when the table broke he fell and took the chandelier with him, and the crashing furniture fell into the china cabinet breaking much of its glass front and the china inside it.

After he got off the floor and brushed himself off he went straight to the corner bar.

 

[Expert684]

My father in law WWII vet was out in the yard woking on something on his work table. I had just got off of work, he said “ glad you are home, I need some help!”
I ask whats the problem? He told me he borrowed my new drill I bought and it couldn’t drill through the metal he was working on!
He even went down to the hardware store and bought new bits, still wouldn’t drill through it.
So I picked up the drill and tried, after a few revolutions, I reversed the drill to forward rotation and went through the metal with no effort.
Popa in law laughed for a half an hour, didn’t know the drill had a reverse.
He said:” I didn’t go to school just to eat lunch”.
God rest his soul, I will chuckle till I hit the grave and see him again!

 

[diverdon]

The state of Wisconsin has over 12,000 voters who have been registered to vote for more than 100 years. They all voted for Biden in the last election. I'm not saying there is voter fraud but that means they have 12,000 people over 118 years old. It is especially amazing since only 4 people on the entire fucking earth lived to be 118 or older before now.

The oldest voter in Wayne County Michigan/Detroit was born in 1849. He/she was one of several thousand voters born in the 19th century who have bene voting recently. This is amazing for many reasons. One in particular is that he is more than 50 years older than any other human on earth. Naturally he voted Democratic,

These are the 81 million who love Pedo-Joe.

100 years ago the voting age was 21. So they would need to be 121.

 

[Trigger Monkey]

Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

About a month ago, my Mom was in the living room but had to get something from their recent road trip that was in another room. Mid-stride on her way into the darkened room she stopped, saw a snake curled up on the floor, and freaked out. She's trying to yell back to my Dad in their beddrom that there's a snake in the house but not so not so loud that she might startle the snake. Anyway, Dad comes out to the living room and sees Mom standing on the ottoman, freaking out over this snake, and telling him to get rid of it. Dad sees this coiled up snake, gets a shovel, and scoops it up to throw it out in the yard. Dad said he thought it was weird the snake didn't move at all and even after it flew through the air into the yard and landed it didn't try to slither away. He thought it must've been dead or stunned but to be sure the beast was slain he was going to cut its head off. Well, just before he dealt the decapitating blow he saw something strange on the underbelly, "Folkmanis Puppets" written on a tag.

Turns out, my daughter had left one of her stuffed toys at their house the day before when she'd been playing with her cousins. I laughed for a good few minutes....I was just glad I didn't have to explain why Granddad killed one of her toys.




Said beast....

 

[powdahound76]

Years ago.
Taking care of an old WWII vet. Had his pilot license before the US entered the war.
Dropped out of school as a freshman, first day of finals week, on Dec 8 1941, then walked to the recruiter’s office with his pilot cert and log book and joined up.

Said he flew every chance he could after the war and once, in his early 70’s was shuttling a stunt plane the Phoenix area when a plane was flying close to him on nearly the same flight path, but had failed to make radio contact and wouldnt respond.

So he used a cloud to sneak and flew in over the top of the guy pretty close to him.

Turned out the offending douche was an FFA inspector who didnt follow the rules and yanked his certificate upon landing.
No amount of arguing that the douche was flying unsafe was heard and he was done.

Cool guy and had a few other cool stories and that was his best.

 

[TonyTheTiger]

The state of Wisconsin has over 12,000 voters who have been registered to vote for more than 100 years. They all voted for Biden in the last election. I'm not saying there is voter fraud but that means they have 12,000 people over 118 years old. It is especially amazing since only 4 people on the entire fucking earth lived to be 118 or older before now.

The oldest voter in Wayne County Michigan/Detroit was born in 1849. He/she was one of several thousand voters born in the 19th century who have bene voting recently. This is amazing for many reasons. One in particular is that he is more than 50 years older than any other human on earth. Naturally he voted Democratic,

These are the 81 million who love Pedo-Joe.

Tried researching this one and all I can find are 2020-21 debunk articles from left leaning sources. Got any more info/sources?

 

[IkeEng]

I was PM on a 10K sqft addition to a manufacturing facility for the company I work for. the GC calls my assistant and asks him to have me get the company stakeholders, the architect, MEP engineer and HVAC contractor together in 2 hours for an emergency meeting. No explanation of what the problem was, but the GC is one of the best I've worked with so I started making calls. Everyone is about an hour away, so they all dropped what they were doing to make it to the meeting.
I get there about 30 minutes late and they are all in the conference room hovering over the plans, tossing out ideas and crunching numbers.

There's a brief pause when I enter the room so I ask what the emergency is. The GC explains that there is this smaller room with two 10 foot chemical fume hoods in it where they can't install the passthrough grate that the design calls for. The passthrough is needed to provide fresh air makeup for the fume hoods.

I look at where he is pointing on the plans and say, well that room doesn't have a door so why the hell do we need the passthrough in the first place? There's silence for a few moments and before anyone says anything I turn to the GC and say lets go, you're buying lunch and I walk out of the room. I was there for less than 3 minutes.

 

[ZiaHunter]

Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

About a month ago, my Mom was in the living room but had to get something from their recent road trip that was in another room. Mid-stride on her way into the darkened room she stopped, saw a snake curled up on the floor, and freaked out. She's trying to yell back to my Dad in their beddrom that there's a snake in the house but not so not so loud that she might startle the snake. Anyway, Dad comes out to the living room and sees Mom standing on the ottoman, freaking out over this snake, and telling him to get rid of it. Dad sees this coiled up snake, gets a shovel, and scoops it up to throw it out in the yard. Dad said he thought it was weird the snake didn't move at all and even after it flew through the air into the yard and landed it didn't try to slither away. He thought it must've been dead or stunned but to be sure the beast was slain he was going to cut its head off. Well, just before he dealt the decapitating blow he saw something strange on the underbelly, "Folkmanis Puppets" written on a tag.

Turns out, my daughter had left one of her stuffed toys at their house the day before when she'd been playing with her cousins. I laughed for a good few minutes....I was just glad I didn't have to explain why Granddad killed one of her toys.




Said beast....

When my parents lived in Albuquerque they had a similar incident but involved a live rattlesnake. My Mom was totally deaf and couldn't hear anything. She is working in the house all day with the rattler inside. My dad who was in the FBI at the time comes home and hears the snake rattling finds it and dispatches it with his 357. Since she is deaf she doesn't hear the shot and my Dad never told her because he feared she would never live in the house after that.

 

[lonegunman762x51]

Tried researching this one and all I can find are 2020-21 debunk articles from left leaning sources. Got any more info/sources?

"It's true that Wisconsin's voter rolls include about 120,000 voters who are listed as having registered more than a century ago. But it's the result of a records merge explained on the website of state election officials – not evidence of election fraud or any other wrongdoing."

This tidbit is true, now to claim that 120,000 dead people are "accidentally" on the voting rolls and this was not used to steal the election is a fucking joke. I want to know how many of them have voted in the last decade and they are fighting to deny that information, Why fight unless these people are used to steal elections?

Fact check: Wisconsin voters listed as registering in 1918 due to records merge, not fraud

Jan. 1, 1918, is the default registration date given to Wisconsin voters whose entries did not include a registration date prior to 2002.

www.usatoday.com

Odell Looper's Michigan Voter Registration​

Battle Creek, Michigan

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Odell Looper (born 1835) is listed at 8292 Bellevue Rd Battle Creek, Mi 49014 and has no known political party affiliation. He is a male registered to vote in Calhoun County, Michigan.

Elizabeth Ann Burcham's Michigan Voter Registration​

Johannesburg, Michigan

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Elizabeth Ann Burcham (born 1850) is listed at 14199 Sparr Rd Johannesburg, Mi 49751 and has no known political party affiliation. She is a female registered to vote in Otsego County, Michigan.

• Detroit had 4,788 duplicate voter registrations
• 32,519 more registered voters than eligible voters
• 2,503 dead people registered
• One voter born in 1823.

The lawsuit was filed in December.

Photo alleging Detroit voter born in 1823 is from 2019 lawsuit that's been cleared up

An image from a FOX 2 broadcast almost 12 months ago is making the rounds online after someone tried to pass it off as being new information. In reality, the story has long been resolved.

www.fox2detroit.com

 

[Steel+Killer]

Poor people can't get IDs, but are somehow on welfare.....