And in other world shattering news:

[Maggot]

Man takes Guinness Book of World Records for sailing a pumpkin.

Nebraska man tries for world record in pumpkin sailing​

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17 hours ago — Nebraska man tries for world record in pumpkin sailing ... Duane Hansen says he floated 38 miles down the Missouri River in "Berta." Duane Hansen says he knew if ...

 

[Thorny]

Two words for that guy, Niagara Falls...