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Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

#5
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: M.45</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: KNIGHT11B4</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Your as f-ing usefull as a football bat...

I love that one. </div></div>

Haha that is f*(King funny! </div></div>

Glad you liked, I kept that one and used it quite often.
 
#10
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

My RDC would always refer to one guy as the division's "Shit Fan" as he was the fattest and slowest at everything.

Mostly though he would just pop up out of nowhere and yell, "DOWN" meaning hit the deck in push-up position.
 
#11
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

"you f**king garbage sucking sh!tbirds are the lowest piece of f**king maggot shit that ever f**king stepped foot on my f**king grinder" ...
circa 1955ad U.S.N.T.C. Bainbridge MD.

back in those days there was no "hard" rules against hitting or using any swear words at a recruit, our DI, a BM-1, carried a "Swagger Stick"..., nuff said.
 
#12
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

Don't remember the insults at My basic, as I was to busy trying to stay invisible(didn't work). I guess Gunny Hartman's,"You're so ugly, You could be a modern art masterpiece" is the funniest I ever heard. Ironically, FMJ was the movie showing at the post theater on our first pass after basic training at Ft. mcclellan.
 
#14
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

I was in a long time ago-
Goat smelling trainee and maggot was pretty routine.

Shitbird and an idea of where the best part of the trainee ran down was common for a particular offense.

One drill at Fort Puke loved to regal us with comments about how mad the army was at him because 'higher' always sent him the turds.

One loved to say dont thank me, thank Gawd for putting me here!

Had a first sargeant who was way too cheerful through the constant rain and mud out in the field. "Thats not rain, thats God's tears of joy at seeing all these fine grunts!"

I think he had more than sugar in his canteen cup of java.
 
#15
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

" Your about as much use as a ashtray on a motorcycle"

" Your about as much use as a chocolate teapot"

" When god gave out spaces you thought he said faces and asked for one between your ears"

Ahhhh the good ole days.
 
#16
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

Done by me
"U.S meaning United as in team"
However in this case
"U SUK"

"You are in fact as worthless as a FART in a space suit"

circa 2003
Chief verbally reprimanded me, thou he was unable to control his laffin as he advised me to throttle back on newbies.

DADT repealed and now wimmen in combat units
WTF
glad i,m retired
 
#17
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

Drill Instructor Staff Sergeant LeRoy:(In his Cajun best)

You God damn grabastic piece of shit, the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass into the alley where she was gang raped by biker midgets


I have always smiled at this from day one when I first heard it, and have used it throughout life as my greatest insult. It just speaks to the breeding of your typical asshat and those repugnant assclowns we all meet on a day to day basis


Of course DI S/Sgt MArtinez was fond of using,"You fucking maggot, I will rip your fucking head off, shit down your neck, then skull fuck you!" It was never yelled, but said in a very slow and earnest voice, barely above a whisper. The groucho walk up as he got low and looked up moving that smoky into a recruit's face was fucking priceless!
 
#20
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

Drill Sgt. Funkhauser at Ft McClellan would look at a one of the recruits and yell "What are you looking at f**kstick?" When there was an investigation over harrassment a Major at Battalion asked one of the guys that was interviewed "What is a f**kstick?" Back at the barracks we all cracked up over that one. SSG Funkhauser had also been a Marine D.I..
 
#22
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Switchblade</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Of course DI S/Sgt MArtinez was fond of using,"You fucking maggot, I will rip your fucking head off, shit down your neck, then skull fuck you!" It was never yelled, but said in a very slow and earnest voice, barely above a whisper. The groucho walk up as he got low and looked up moving that smoky into a recruit's face was fucking priceless!</div></div>

I had a DI S/Sgt Martinez when I went through basic at MCRD in 1983. Do you think it is the same?
 
#25
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: scottishtornado</div><div class="ubbcode-body">" Your about as much use as a ashtray on a motorcycle"

" Your about as much use as a chocolate teapot"

" When god gave out spaces you thought he said faces and asked for one between your ears"

Ahhhh the good ole days. </div></div>


CLASSIC! Thx.
 
#26
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

One night while stretching out for a midnight "smoke session" after our E-7 Drill Sergeant came back to the barracks after no doubt getting in a fight with his E-9 wife (we could always tell because he'd come back and take his frustration out on us) we were doing that stretch where you sit on your ass kind of cross legged but not quite, with the soles of your feet together and bounce your knees up and down. Anyway, he said, "just think pryates" (he never said priVates) "just think pryates, if you were at Ft Jackson, you could be looking at your battle buddies pussy right now, oh wait, you ARE looking at your battle buddies pussy".

We werent at Ft. Jackson, and there were no actual pussies present being nothing but swinging dick as far as the eye could see. Although there were some pussies in spirit.
 
#27
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

I always liked "you are as wrong as two boys fuckin in the corner" and "your as ate up as dick stew at a gay bar". Those two were always classic.
 
#28
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Switchblade</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Short little sawed off motherfucker, Mexican, kinda stocky, and if memory serves, 03 series? I gradded 'Hollywood' Sep 18th '82 and was in Millington NAS on the Birthday. He very well could be the same guy...3BN, right?

PM to you Mechanic...
Semper Fiiii!</div></div>
That's him. Small world.
smile.gif
 
#29
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

If you saw him, you had to see LeRoy from 3BN. He was this tall assed Cajun, light green freckled motherfucker with a voice that would carry across the grinder. Wehn I was at KMCAS shortly after our det to Oki, I was walking down the blvd from teh PX back to my wing side, and I hear this familiar voice,"Yea HEY Marine! Where Yew GOIN Boy!? I stopped fuck dead in my tracks, looked slowly back and across teh street, and there was that sumbitch still tall and freckled ass light green as he ever was. We of course shook hands, and made tracks to the club where several brews were consumed and deep bullshit sea stories swapped.
You just don't see that in the Army. The Esprit de Corps isn;t quite there, and the Brotherhood is definately lacking.
God Loves a Marine!
Ohh Rah!
 
#30
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

So I was at MCRD Paris Island on the rifle range. Me and Recruit Smith were pulling butts together. We had the "DOG" target high in the sky waiting for an impact when Smith started scratching his nuts. Right then DI SSgt Pickle was walking by. He was a nerdy Optics tech and he stops and says in his screechy, crackling voice, with a contorted knife hand thrown at us:

"Oh good to go, you want to scratch you nuts in front of your optically enhanced drill instructor. You a F&$%ing disgusting."

What made it funnier was he was wearing glasses instead of contacts and this was the first time he ever wore them in front of the maggots.
 
#35
Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults?

There was a short exchange I overheard a few years back when I was in Navy Boot, it occurred during drill on the grinder. It went like this:

DI: "Recruit so and so, is you're stomach made out of Plexiglas?"
Recruit: "No sir!"
DI: "Then I suggest you pull your head out of your ass so you can see where the fuck you're going!"
 
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