I need help!!!!

[Triman2008]

I come to you, my brothers and sisters in a time of need. We( my wife and I) recently made a decision to sell one of our vehicles and buy a new one (to us). The wife was on board with selling the car and getting a large car. Now she is having sellers remoarse.

We have been fighting for 2 days straight since we sold the car, and nothing is getting accomplished. I had a car lined up to buy, but she does not want rear wheel drive because we live in Michigan. She has never owned a rear wheel drive car, but I have and know how to drive in crap weather.

The car is alittle older than what I just sold (2007 Mazdaspeed 6) and want to pick up a 2003 Mercedes Benz S55 AMG. The car has all the features and ammenities that a person could want in a car for the same price I sold the Mazda for. We have 2 kids, 2 1/2 yr and a 8 month old. I am looking at the size of the vehicle, and the power of the car. The mazda was just too small for car seats. She has now reneged twice on her word to go forward with my original thought.

My question is, what do I do? Do I buy the S55, or do I for go that car and buy what she wants? Do I give in to the fighting and do what she wants? I know the old saying, happy wife, happy life. Not always the case with her. It seems like she is never "truely" happy with life in general. We have our issues, as does any marriage, but it seems like as of late she is really over dramatic about life and decisions that are made.

I could really use your help with this matter. I am looking for good, bad, or indefferent responses to this. I need a third party non-partial opinion. Thank you all.

Eric

 

[Mike]

Re: I need help!!!!

Here's my honest opinion. Don't buy the S55. Why? First, although at that age you can pick one up reasonable, maintenance is not going to be reasonable. Next, you live in Michigan and a big RWD of any make isn't the smartest move. You're setting yourself up for theft and/or vandalism. Sure, you get everything you want in that MB but it's a status symbol and one you may not want to portray.

Buy her what she wants or at least lean towards her compromise. Buy something newer and more practical for your environment and situation.

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

Mike thanks, I didn't mention that we have a second vehicle which is a Lincoln Navigator.....which she drives the majority of the time. We have no plans on getting rid of that truck as it has served us well and fits the kids no problem. I understand the RWD concerns, and the "status" thing. I guess I need to be a little more understanding and compromising of her as well. I would still like a know what else to buy. I am at a complete loss here.

 

[Mike]

Re: I need help!!!!

The "what else to buy" question can be easily remedied. Break it down to large/small, 2/4 door, sporty/practical, small SUV/Car, etc.

If she says "I don't know", then you tell her to put it on the back burner until she at least has some idea. Places like www.edmunds.com have tools that can help you decide. There are too many variables without knowing exacting details to make a suggestion.

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

Thanks Mike.

 

[1911fan]

Re: I need help!!!!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mike</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Here's my honest opinion. Don't buy the S55. Why? First, although at that age you can pick one up reasonable, maintenance is not going to be reasonable. </div></div>

+100, this is why my folks recently got rid of the beloved 530SEL. <span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="font-style: italic">Everything</span></span> on that car was insanely overpriced. Recently it needed plugs, plug wires, distributor cap, and rotor. Done right, with OEM parts, it was $600. Part of that is labor, but still.....

Second, the two of you should reevaluate what you want the next car for. Since she drives the Navigator, will this be 'your' car? Is it a third car, and if so why do you really need it?

Third, may I suggest counseling? This was a joint decision that she is now refusing to go through with. Part of it may be that she doesn't want the S55 for whatever reason. But referring to the part of your post that says, "<span style="font-style: italic"> It seems like she is never "truely" happy with life in general. We have our issues, as does any marriage, but it seems like as of late she is really over dramatic about life and decisions that are made</span>." This could be a sign of deeper issues, especially since it seems to be a recent change.

DON'T BUY THE S55! One, maintenance is expensive. Two, at this point it is a symbol. She's dead set against it for whatever reason, and if you buy it she will get mad every time she thinks about it. Also, every time it needs anything, she'll get to say "I <span style="font-style: italic">told </span> you not to buy that. You can't win this one.


My .02, and I've been happily divorced for several years.


1911fan

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

1911fan, I can hear the voice too if I bought the car, "<span style="font-style: italic">I told you so!!!!! </span>. But on the flip side I could say the samething with the next car that she wants. I have the feeling this is a lose, lose thing that is about to happen.

This is not a third car and would be my car primarily. My concern is not so much with the cost to own/operate and maintenance, but whether she will be happy with any choice made, PERIOD!!!

 

[tmcginnis]

Re: I need help!!!!

Lets put it this way. My dad owns a very successful car shop here in uptown (dallas). There is a reason it is very successful. We love to see the BMW, MB, Porsche, etc drive in. To be honest, stay away from the MB and go with the mazda. You would be surprised on how chitty some of the "higher end" cars are. And no matter the age, repairs are gonna be $$$. MB are not worth it in my opinion. Mazda is a good car, well made (for the money), and easy and less costly to repair. Keep that in mind.

PS... depending on where you are and what the current prices are, that MB is going to take a heavy load of synthetic oil plus an upcharge for a higher end oil filter. Mazda wont. (unless its the turbo, then possibly some synthetic, still less than the MB). $80-120 for the MB, $30-55 for the mazda, or like-kind car.

just my .02

 

[Lumpy Grits]

Re: I need help!!!!

Look VERY HARD at the Subaru Outback

They are AWD and run forfreak'n-ever.
My wife and I('03 Forrester)own 2 now(just gave her new one for her b'day) and they are the best cars I have ever owned.
I have owned Subaru's for over 20 yrs and will keep buying them.
Respectfully,
LG

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

Thanks for the responses guys. The Mazdaspeed 6 was pretty pricey in its own right.....to fix an altenator it was like 250-300, just for the part, labor would have been about the same.....for an altenator. Mazdaspeed also use a proprietary oil filter that is pricey for a filter. I think all cars now days are pricey to operate and maintain. The wife says she wants something "sporty" and not a grandma car.

 

[Guest]

Re: I need help!!!!

For reference and perspective, please post a picture of your wife's balls.

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

Tucker301, I applaud your comment, but in a marriage there has to be communication and compromise.

 

[jr81452]

Re: I need help!!!!

Seems to me the solution is simple. You know your budget and what features the car "must have". Just tell her to find a car that fits those parameters and you will buy it, if you can't articulate why it's a bad idea. Women love to shop, let her.

 

[Guest]

Re: I need help!!!!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Triman2008</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Tucker301, I applaud your comment, but in a marriage there has to be communication and compromise. </div></div>

So.... can you link to the forum where she's posting and asking for advice on the same matter?

 

[Guest]

Re: I need help!!!!

Oh and I bought my wife a 2011 Elantra.
I gave her three color choices.

 

[schiaa]

Re: I need help!!!!

Dude, if you can't buy it with cash, you probably shouldn't buy it. Especially since you have a family. I recommend you take a look at a used Ford Explorer or similar.

Besides, think of all the extra money for guns and stuff.

 

[ArcticLight]

Re: I need help!!!!

Think of the money you would save if you bought reasonable vehicles. Wow.
I don't mean this bad - take it as advice..
I own a 1996 Nissan 4x4, a 1980 Scirocco for summer time fun, and a motorcycle. I have a total of maybe 15,000 invested in all three vehicles but have owned the VW for 17 years.
I've owned the Nissan for 12 years.
The motorcycle, it's an 05 but "New" as miles go.

Maintenance is far cheaper than a new vehicle - all of my vehicles have a new interior after 100k, engine work that is required etc...

The price of gas is only going up when Saudi Arabia cut production today, they are SERIOUSLY saying 8 bucks a gallon this year.
My sister had to havea Lexus, until gas went to $4 a gallon - now she drives a Honda Pilot - AWESOME vehicle...

You're going to get door dings, rust from the salt there, and someone will eventually hit you.

Spend your money on something else. I watched a guy fuel up a Lincoln Navigator (Maybe a cadillac not sure) and HOLY SHEEIT BATMAN.
Can you afford $100 a week on gas??? This guy was almost crying.


I have a small 2 bedroom house, paid off vehicles, $30,000 in the bank and I'm unemployed going to school.
I live a frugal life. BUT, when I wanted a USOptics scope I call them up, transfer $2000 and I get what I want - that was 12 years ago and it looks brand new and has been used extensively....

Hate to see people go into debt for a vehicle too.

Just my take,, since getting laid off the ONLY thing I've bought is the motorcycle, parking at school sucks.

BTW Mercedes, just a name. Volkswagen makes a good ride at half the price.
Status? Ha - I laugh when I see Mercedes because someone spent $100k on a car....and someone's going to hit it.
That's too much responsibility!!!

Of course if you are a doctor and have 100k in the bank, you pay cash for a Toyota, Nissan, Volkswagen - you'll still have 80k in the bank.
I was in debt once - never again, I will never be a slave to the credit card companies or an automobile.
It's financial freedom!

Sorry, sounds like a rant

 

[ArcticLight]

Re: I need help!!!!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Triman2008</div><div class="ubbcode-body">This is not a third car and would be my car primarily. My concern is not so much with the cost to own/operate and maintenance, but whether she will be happy with any choice made, PERIOD!!! </div></div>

Ever hear of a guy named "Tom Leykis"???

Google him.

Then see my post above this one.

 

[fox5]

Re: I need help!!!!

Save the money, don't get the AMG. You could get better cars for the price that you spend. No one knows how high gas will be. It's really scary that it could get higher, not as high as Europe, but everyone will feel the pinch. Be safe, get a front or 4 wheel drive car.
What's important in life is that you get the safest car that you can for your family. Don't make finances something that you argue about. Find something you can both agree on. Its alot of money to drop on something you'll have for at least a decade if everything goes well.

 

[Triman2008]

Re: I need help!!!!

I have no debit, and will be paying cash for the car.....like I said I sold the other car and have 24K to spend. I really appreciate all the help, and advise. I guess for now we are going to "sit on it" for a while. Thanks again guys.

 

[Greg Langelius *]

Re: I need help!!!!

Up here, a healthy stone's throw from Canada, the smart money is on a kindly used Subaru wagon.

 

[Maggot]

Re: I need help!!!!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ArcticLight</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Think of the money you would save if you bought reasonable vehicles. Wow.
I don't mean this bad - take it as advice..
I own a 1996 Nissan 4x4, a 1980 Scirocco for summer time fun, and a motorcycle. I have a total of maybe 15,000 invested in all three vehicles but have owned the VW for 17 years.
I've owned the Nissan for 12 years.
The motorcycle, it's an 05 but "New" as miles go.

Maintenance is far cheaper than a new vehicle - all of my vehicles have a new interior after 100k, engine work that is required etc...

The price of gas is only going up when Saudi Arabia cut production today, they are SERIOUSLY saying 8 bucks a gallon this year.
My sister had to havea Lexus, until gas went to $4 a gallon - now she drives a Honda Pilot - AWESOME vehicle...

You're going to get door dings, rust from the salt there, and someone will eventually hit you.

Spend your money on something else. I watched a guy fuel up a Lincoln Navigator (Maybe a cadillac not sure) and HOLY SHEEIT BATMAN.
Can you afford $100 a week on gas??? This guy was almost crying.


I have a small 2 bedroom house, paid off vehicles, $30,000 in the bank and I'm unemployed going to school.
I live a frugal life. BUT, when I wanted a USOptics scope I call them up, transfer $2000 and I get what I want - that was 12 years ago and it looks brand new and has been used extensively....

Hate to see people go into debt for a vehicle too.

Just my take,, since getting laid off the ONLY thing I've bought is the motorcycle, parking at school sucks.

BTW Mercedes, just a name. Volkswagen makes a good ride at half the price.
Status? Ha - I laugh when I see Mercedes because someone spent $100k on a car....and someone's going to hit it.
That's too much responsibility!!!

Of course if you are a doctor and have 100k in the bank, you pay cash for a Toyota, Nissan, Volkswagen - you'll still have 80k in the bank.
I was in debt once - never again, I will never be a slave to the credit card companies or an automobile.
It's financial freedom!

Sorry, sounds like a rant

</div></div>

I appreciate you frugallity rant, AL My small home is paid for, I owe no money, and have some in the bank. Being single helps.

I do disagree with your VW as good as Mercedes statement. Ive owned both. The VW's (no insult to VWHugger) just arent in the same class.....after a year or so little things start going wrong, little pieces of hardware break off, and they are just not that solidly buill. I bought a like new/used 2007 Mercedes E 320 Blu Tec deisel with 50,000miles for $29,000 and have driven it 25000 trouble free miles. It gets 27 local and 38 hiway and is as sweet and smoothe a ride as a baby's ass, yet will corner well and great acceleration...o-60 in 6.3 seconds or so, The deisel should run 400,000 miles at least. Ya just have to use a bit of deisel fuell conditioner to keep the injectors clean.

BTW my other vehicle is a 2002 Chevy C3500 Van, paid for, with 220,000 paid for miles on it.

 

[shibby575]

Re: I need help!!!!

I'm sorry, I can not agree with everyone else here. Its not about reliability or cost. If you will be driving this thing 99% of the time why does she care what you will be driving. She's driving the Lincoln, if she doesn't like it let her sell that and get what she wants. If you were driving the mazda, and don't want it anymore, then get what you want to drive. It's a simple fix.

 

[ArcticLight]

Re: I need help!!!!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Triman2008</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I have no debit, and will be paying cash for the car.....like I said I sold the other car and have 24K to spend. I really appreciate all the help, and advise. I guess for now we are going to "sit on it" for a while. Thanks again guys. </div></div>

Awesome - hope I didn't come across as a hard ass, been there and done that though.

In the end you would not be happy, and you'd be broke.

Cars are just a tool, sure they look nice but they can be a money pit.

Put your money in something fun, buy a ch eap car a nice bike! Or a new rifle

 

[ken12]

Re: I need help!!!!

Better get what your wife wants.

 

[Magstang1]

Re: I need help!!!!

Happiness should not be quantified buy the amount of money you spend, or the car you drive.

Buy what is best for the entire family.

Sacrifices are always made. And they should be made by everyone in the family equally.

 

[RebelYell]

Re: I need help!!!!

First off...who is gonna be the driver of it? If its her then shut her up and let her pick it out. If it you, by all means get what you want. If its the main family car, do yourself a favor and let her do the picking but before you buy ask her what are her reasons for getting that vehicle...can possibly ask yourself that same question for your choices.