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Let the Great Acquaintance Purge of 2020 commence!

TheGerman

Oberleutnant
Full Member
Minuteman
  • Jan 25, 2010
    10,595
    30,189
    the Westside
    Had a really stressful year a few years back where I just felt like I was trying to constantly herd cats, could only get anything to happen if I forced it to and was just fucking done with everyone and their low IQ substandard bullshit.

    My wife, on New Years eve, always does a horoscope for the coming year and while you can try and pin/fit anything in them to a situation you have experienced, that year's horoscope was like someone had watched me over the last 12 months and took detailed notes. The main thing in it was to jettison the people who you might need, but were way more trouble than they were worth. Anyone who you wouldn't go to war for, even if they were 'satisfactory' as a friend, or work acquaintance, whatever....forget them and move on. The hilarious thing is, for quite a few of them, once I stopped contacting them and/or being the non flaky person, they basically went away on their own.

    The positive results in my life and my wife's life were almost instant. I've never been accused of being too friendly or anything, but this really set a tone that I still follow and really opened my eyes to just how fucking selfish/useless/full of shit most people are.

    Now every year, on New Year's Eve, I do a little inventory, and every year, I kick some people off the island. Friends/acquaintances/neighbors are way fucking overrated.
     
    I figured this out several years ago and has made my life so much simpler. I got tired of people only calling or messaging when they want something so I just quit responding after a while. I don't have weekend projects anymore fixing other people's vehicles or projects around their houses. I can also count all my friends on one hand and it doesn't bother me one bit. My brother likes to give me shit about it because he thinks he is cool and has a bunch of friends but I always get the last laugh. When he has a bigger project around the house and I go to help, I always ask where all his buddies are at. He always has excuses why nobody else showed up and I'm quick to point out how many times he's helped them but they never return the favor. I've also figured out that most of the people you work with are acquaintances not friends. I'm content with hanging out with the dogs, reading shit on the internet and going shooting.
     
    You sound like me and my wife now that we're almost 50. At 40, we were socializing all the time and had a constant parade of "friends" in our lives. Life is so much happier with all that drama gone. Now we spend time with family and very few others outside of work, and I don't miss a thing. I still have a couple of old friends who I could call if SHTF but we don't need to be hanging out constantly.
     
    I think I can relate to what you are saying.
    As news has traveled around my circle about my planned move South, tongues have been wagging.
    "What got into Joe?"
    "That don't sound like Joe."
    "Why in the world is he leaving?"

    Oh they aren't asking me, which is telling I suppose. My aquaintances know I'll answer them in my best Wilford Brimley tone, "None of yer fuckin bizness."
    "Is he becoming some kind of hermit?"
    Actually, that's always been my tendency.

    I've a handful of friends I will miss dearly. There are about 5 people on the planet I trust with my life, sadly maybe 2 are family.

    Here is to a bright new year as a hermit.
     
    genius

    and I say this all the time, there are good customers and bad customers, I stopped doing business with bad ones. the whole, the customer is always right is way overrated. I would rather focus on the good because the bad will just take all the air out of the room making all suffer.

    great new years advice
     
    Man, I’ve kinda been doing this my whole life. In real life I’m actually pretty quiet. Unless I consider you a friend, and then I’ll talk your ear off about nothing or shoot the shit about anything. Also, if I consider you a friend, it’s for life. I don’t need to hear from them all the time, In fact, I had a friend from years ago call me out of the blue and we picked up with conversation like I hadn’t seen him in a week. I’m not on this earth to impress anyone. I have very wealthy friends and family, and poor ones as well. I don’t care. Don’t be a dick and have common interests and I can get along with anyone. But if you start shit or only ever contact me when you need a “Favor” I’ll ghost you and never feel bad about it.
     
    I grew up a military brat (Dad did 20 in the Marines) so this purge happened to me every 3-4 years with every PCS whether I liked it or not and I got used to it. 38 years old now and my circle outside of my brothers, wife, and a couple cousins is one friend who has been a long time shooting buddy, that's it. Makes things pretty easy. However, I would caution that we should never grow weary of doing good for others.
     
    One of my favorite quotes is from Einstein, "I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.” I just want to be a good man, a good husband and father, and go hunting and shooting in the desert. Otherwise, leave me alone. I don't need any more friends....well, other than here on The Hide. Plenty of good people here who have made me a better man. Cheers to less BS in 2020.
     
    genius

    and I say this all the time, there are good customers and bad customers, I stopped doing business with bad ones. the whole, the customer is always right is way overrated. I would rather focus on the good because the bad will just take all the air out of the room making all suffer.

    great new years advice
    When I started my business 30 yrs ago I had the mentality about the customer was always right. About twenty miserable fuckin yrs and the wife with a good job, I started giving the bad ones a big fuck you! Now I’m down to about 10 percent of what I had. If they piss me off it will be even less real fast!
     
    I’ve always been pretty conservative about who I shared my time with. My time is MY time. My wife on the other hand will offer to help people move that she doesn’t even know. Although she’s backed way off on that crap lately. I’ve got a very small circle of people I will drop what I am doing to help - that will return the favor for me also. But again, that’s a small circle. Incidentally, I would trust my life to that same small circle - and vice/versa.
     
    I've been doing this for about 8 years now....still trying to get it through the wifes head. It has made for a much less stressful daily life and she is slowly coming around to realize the benefits. I've found the true friends that you might have missed will find their way back as well.
     
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    Had a really stressful year a few years back where I just felt like I was trying to constantly herd cats, could only get anything to happen if I forced it to and was just fucking done with everyone and their low IQ substandard bullshit.

    My wife, on New Years eve, always does a horoscope for the coming year and while you can try and pin/fit anything in them to a situation you have experienced, that year's horoscope was like someone had watched me over the last 12 months and took detailed notes. The main thing in it was to jettison the people who you might need, but were way more trouble than they were worth. Anyone who you wouldn't go to war for, even if they were 'satisfactory' as a friend, or work acquaintance, whatever....forget them and move on. The hilarious thing is, for quite a few of them, once I stopped contacting them and/or being the non flaky person, they basically went away on their own.

    The positive results in my life and my wife's life were almost instant. I've never been accused of being too friendly or anything, but this really set a tone that I still follow and really opened my eyes to just how fucking selfish/useless/full of shit most people are.

    Now every year, on New Year's Eve, I do a little inventory, and every year, I kick some people off the island. Friends/acquaintances/neighbors are way fucking overrated.
    Been there, done that. I wrote a book on it with all the names effected by our exodus decisions. Then I ceremoniously burned the book. Life is better now.
    I don’t have any friends anymore and don’t celebrate holidays with family either.
    So, if you ever decide to build a support group,,, just let me know... K? ?

    Here’s to a happy new year to all you belligerents!!! ????
     
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    I’m getting six nightforces? I may just send a can of copenhagen and a pack of marlboro lights with those shiners.

    1577926805937.gif
     
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    Been on the remote island of small business ownership for just over 10years. Had lots of “friends” back when getting going. Seems like the tectonic plate is moving my island further and further away from the motherland. Good advice here in this thread. My contact list in my cell phone has way more entries so that I know to avoid their call than people I’d like to hear from. Sorta depressing, but at the same time, simple life is where I’m working towards. Happy New Year
     
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    Im lucky my wife and I did this when we got married, it was not intentional but like Frank said the bad ones take the air out of the room. Thankfully my wife does not need validation from other women and stays clear of the drama. We are both very extraverted and everyone is our 'friend' but at the end of the day I have 3 what I call "kidney friends" and that is it. I think its self explanatory but...the kidney friend is the guy that picks up the phone, and says "Im on my way to the hospital" no questions asked and would make a that sacrifice for me or my family.
     
    Things change, relationships move on to new normals, people drift in and out.

    I'd really rather let things find their own balance than stew over decisions that don't really need to be made. Most annoyances end up becoming self correcting problems.

    Better things could be occupying one's mind.

    Greg
     
    I've always been pretty introverted and quiet around new people. As I've gotten older, I've started to be a bit more extroverted but I still don't let people get too close, usually. Work acquaintances are just that and I don't ever really see or talk to them outside of work. Relatives outside my immediate family are just people I say hello to a few times a year.

    Sometimes it's depressing to think about the fact that I can count my "friends" on my fingers without having to include my thumbs, but this thread makes me thankful that I've never had to worry or mess with unnecessary drama.
     
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    If they don't add value to your life or at worst if they subtract value from your life, write them the fuck off. Friends and/or family included.
     
    I can’t understand the blinders, that go up for some people, in regards to family. It’s like family is supposed to get some kitchen pass to be assholes.
     
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    My wife and I had this discussion over the holidays. First to go, anyone we consider to be an "adult bully" then social climbers. Then weed out the negative, drama, attention seekers. It is much easier for me because my wife is a nice person and I am...not so much.
     
    My wife and I had this discussion over the holidays. First to go, anyone we consider to be an "adult bully" then social climbers. Then weed out the negative, drama, attention seekers. It is much easier for me because my wife is a nice person and I am...not so much.

    i similarly agree, but hell man, what are you going to do? sit around and watch the waltons with your 2 friends of the world, after you
    eliminated all the holiday fun.
    be the provacator, you must drive this train wreck as far as you can till all the assholes flee