Maggie’s SHERIFF EXAM - Attitude Suitability Test

[Decoy]

SHERIFF EXAM:

A young Texan grew up wanting to be a lawman.

He grew up big, 6' 2", strong as a longhorn, and fast as mustang.

He could shoot a bottle cap tossed in the air at 40 paces.

When he finally came of age, he applied to where he had only dreamed of working the West Texas Sheriff's Department.

After a series of tests and interviews, the Chief Deputy finally called him into his office for the young man's last interview. The Chief Deputy said, "You're a big strong kid and you can really shoot. So far your qualifications all look good, but we have, what you might call, an "Attitude Suitability Test", that you must take before you can be accepted. We just don't let anyone carry our badge, son."

Then, sliding a service pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, the Chief said, "Take this pistol and go out and shoot:

six illegal aliens,

six lawyers,

six meth dealers,

six Muslim extremists,

six Democrats,

and a rabbit."

"Why the rabbit?" queried the applicant.

"You pass," said the Chief Deputy.

"When can you start?"

 

[opelboy]

That's great made me laugh thanks

 

[Graham]

A Deputy Sheriff was killed and he went to hell. He was assigned to the Devil as his FTO. The Devil began showing him around. They passed-by the pit of excrement for federal agents. There was a long line of agents trying to climb out of the pit. At the top of the pit was a guard with a rifle. As each agent made it to the top, the guard would strike him with the butt of the rifle and the agent would fall back down into the pit to join the back of the line to start the climb all over again. They passed-by the pit for city police officers, where the same scene repeated itself. They arrived at the pit of excrement for county Deputies. The Deputy saw no guard at the top of the pit. 'Here's where I drop you off.' Said the Devil. The Deputy, who couldn't believe his good fortune at the lack of supervision, asked 'Why don't the county employees have a guard to stop them from climbing out?' 'It's not necessary,' said the Devil, 'every time a Deputy climbs to the top of the pile the command staff reach up, grab him by the ankles, and pull him back down into the shit'.