AR 500 LOL

[QuickNDirty]

Hello Citizen of the Armored Republic,

We've got good news and less good news about your order:

The Good News
Your new carrier is on it's way.

Upon launching our new carriers, the AR Freeman and the AR Invictus, you showed tremendous confidence in us by placing an order well in advance on them actually being available. We recognize and appreciate your trust.

The Less Good News
We don't anticipate actually being able to start shipping out the new carriers until tomorrow.

When you placed your order, we were promising to ship it in January. Tomorrow is February 1st, which means we are breaking that promise and we don't take that lightly.

We had been coordinating everything to be able to start shipping our new products out in the second half of January, which was admittedly cutting it close and perhaps overly optimistic on our part, but let's just say that an unexpected slowdown in processing imported components has pushed us beyond our target. Perhaps if a certain member of the California delegation to Congress cared about national security, this email wouldn't be necessary.

Anyway, we are currently expecting everything to be here at our headquarters in Phoenix, AZ tomorrow and we'll begin shipping orders out as quickly as possible.

This may seem like a bit much for a one day delay, but we're a company who values the integrity of our word. We're certainly not perfect, but we do everything we can to keep our promises and to own it when we fail. For that reason, we apologize for the delay.

Thank you for your patience and support!

Geoffrey Schultz
Director of Customer Obsession

AR500 Armor®
17431 N Black Canyon Hwy
Phoenix, AZ 85023

 

[Redmanss]

Haha, that's pretty good.

My son (who is autistic) is very impatiently waiting on his Christmas presents I bought him. He's obsessed with Transformers and wanted some limited edition models that were on pre-order. Well, the delay continues and I had to explain to him what getting something from overseas entails, including coming across on the ocean and sitting in a port facility until customs releases the container. When I mentioned to him about the shutdown and how that also affected those customs inspections, he was very irate and wanted to know why Pelosi wouldn't let the President build a wall. I told him it was because bitches be bitches, he agreed and is still grumbling about not having his new Optimus and Megatron.

 

[oneshot86]

fuckin nancy holding up the megatron...
bitch

 

[MtnCreek]

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"

Hello,
Here at Brownells we value your business and want to keep you informed. Due to the dangerous cold conditions in our part of the nation, many parcel carriers have suspended pickup of orders from our fulfillment center today, January 30th. This may cause some delivery delays outside of our control.
Rest assured your order is being processed and packed ready to ship and will be on the way to you once the carriers are able to pick it up.
Thank you for being a Brownells customer, The Gang at Brownells

 

[MtnCreek]

@Redmanss
I'm sure your son will enjoy his Optimus Prime as much as I did. Even after outgrowing my transformers, I used Optimus Prime's trailer for firecracker storage. Worked great til friends of my parents came over and let their kid play with my old toys.