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Ermahgerd, the FBI found my trunk with 4.1 million dollars!!

sentry1

Crayon Eater
Full Member
Minuteman
Jul 7, 2012
1,991
5
41
Madison, Alabama
I guess now that everyone's caught onto the Nigerian Prince scheme, the schmucks with nothing better to do had to get creative. If anyone wants to troll the sender, please post the results!

Federal Bureau of Investigation
Intelligence Field Unit
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C.
20535-0001, USA.

Urgent Attention: Beneficiary

I am special agent John Edward from the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) Field Intelligence Unit, we have just intercepted and confiscated two (2) trunk boxes at John F Kennedy airport in New York, and are on the verge of moving it to our bureau headquarter.

We crosschecked the content of the boxes and found it to contain a total sum of $4.1 million and also backup documents which bears your name as the receiver of the money contained in the boxes, investigations carried out on the diplomat which accompanied the boxes into the united states has it that he was to deliver this funds to your residence as payment which was due you from unpaid contract, inheritance, lotto, loan, etc.

We cross-checked all legal documentations in the boxes, and were about to release the consignment to the diplomat, when we found out that the boxes is lacking two very important documentation which as a result, the boxes has been confiscated and kept in our security vault.

According to section 229 subsection 31 of the constitution ratified in 1992, your consignment lacks proof of OWNERSHIP CERTIFICATE AND LEGAL DELIVERY PERMIT CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE from the joint team of the Federal Bureau Of Investigation and homeland security and therefore you must contact us for direction on how to procure the two certificates, so that you can be relieved of the charges of evading tax which is a punishable offense under section 12 subsection 441 of constitution on tax evasion.

You are therefore required to get back to me on this email.
{[email protected]} within 72 hours, so that i will guide you on how to get the needed documents. Failure to comply with our directive may lead you into problem; you may be arrested, interrogated and prosecuted in the court of law for money laundering.

We may also get the Financial Action Task Force (FATF) on money laundering involved if you do not follow our instructions. You are also advised not to get in contact with any bank in Africa, Europe or any other institution, since your funds are here now in the United States of America and can be delivered to any country of your choice once you secure those required documents.

Yours in service

Agent John Edward
Regional director
Federal Bureau of Investigation
E-mail: [email protected]
 
I have a sneaky suspicion that getting the forms, or assistance of John Edward would cost anyone who sought either forms or his assistance some money.
 
I thought John Edward worked in the FBI's Paranormal Affairs Department.... must've gotten transferred.
 
This will probably get taken care of within a week.

Seems pretending to be an agent of certain federal agencies is more of a crime, then pretending to be a member of the military(still technically underneath the federal umbrella).
 
The funniest part is that they used the name of a North Carolina politician who got indicted for doing similar stuff. Obviously the sender has a sense of humor.
 
I have read the constitution a couple of times and I have yet to find section 229 subsection 31 or section 12 subsection 441...
 
I just got the exact same email word for word this morning!, something told me to Google the headline, he almost had me going
 
When the FBI wants to talk, they don't send you an email. They knock on your door.
 
Ermahgerd, the FBI found my trunk with 4.1 million dollars!!

I respond by asking them to send me the required contact information care of the address of the organized crime unit, and I tell them that I look forward to collecting my winnings in person.

So far I have seen one local fee-fraud ring successfully prosecuted.
 
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You'd think FBI agents would rate a .gov on the end of their email address.
 
I love this stuff! I managed a bank for a while and played along with a Craigslist scam until I got their check... when I didn't send them their money they got pissed! I tried to meet them in person, but it didn't work out. I kept the checks to train my customers and tellers against these scams.
 
These are funny but unfortunately people fall for these scams, usually the most vulnerable. Lady up the street from me is 90 plus years old, husband was a WWII vet that passed some 10 or more years ago. The scam she fell for was the phone call that starts "Grandma its me Ive been arrested!" So when she says "Is that you John?" they set the hook "Yeah Grandma its John. Im in Mexico the cops are crooked they say if you dont send $2000.00 Ill never return to the United States."

They got her for about $5K when someone smart (caring) at the bank asked whats going on.

The FBI has a site (IC3) for reporting these scams. You can forward all these Nigerian 419 scams to them, they create a database and identify the scammers.