I'm 35 and engaged to a great woman, who is willing to try just about anything shooting, and decided she liked sporting clays enough, to buy herself a Benelli M2. The day I gave her the ring, she gave me my AXMC.
My friend's wife recently said I was the most uncompromising person she knows. They (friends) always used to say that's a bad thing. But, I landed a pretty damned good woman in the end.
I have a few guiding principles that I always made sure to get ahead of very early on if I thought she might be worth more than just fuckin. That includes:
1) Total, pure equality (hence the AXMC); this one typically gets their attention.
2) I follow that up with "Only a fool would enter into a contract controlled by the government for which they know stands a 50% chance of dissolving, despite every single person who goes into it, being 100% convinced that it won't, then having to rely on the government to determine what is "fair""- in other words, only a fool gets married without a prenuptial agreement. Especially if you're a man. You don't carry health and catastrophic insurance because you expect to get cancer or lose your legs; you carry it because you're totally fucked if it happens and you don't have it. This usually gets the worst among them to run away.
3) I don't believe in mixing life and finances until after marriage; includes living together. (this one ended up having to be broken, due to other external events)
4) My guns are MY business, and you have nothing to say, or input on the subject. I'd like to have you enjoy it too, but it's MY hobby and you are not and will never be, in a position to make decisions related to it.
5) I have no interest in telling you how to spend your money, you will not be telling me how to spend mine. So long as the bills are paid and reasonable preparations for life and retirement exist, if you want something, and you can afford it from what you earn, go for it.
Now, a lot of guys will say "oh, they'll go along with that until you're married, then it all changes". I'm not married YET, so I cannot say conclusively that such is not the case for me, but my observations are that guys who end up in that kind of situation, did not state and execute those things important to them in strong enough terms. She needs to know exactly where you stand and that you WILL NOT waiver on that which is important to you. My GF knows that if she told me tomorrow that it's her or my guns, she's gone. She knows that will be the case 30 years from now. To someone not smart enough to understand what is at work, that may seem very cold and evidence that I don't love her. On the contrary- I would view that as such a betrayal from someone who is supposed to love me, that they are no longer a needed part of my life. Because I VERY clearly stated where I stand and that I am unmovable, then demonstrated it in how I live my life and conduct myself; it is how it is, I'm not changing for anyone, and anyone who, knowing all of this still wants me to change, doesn't truly respect me enough to deserve my time.
You set the field right and you're not going to have to worry about this sort of thing. Just understand that women will push you and test your limits. They think they will change you to suit what they want. You have to make sure they understand 100% that you will kick her ass to the curb before sacrificing "ZXY". Shit you're not THAT concerned with- be flexible. Stuff that is very important to you- do not yield one bit; you set a BAD precedent.
I would approach your situation as follows:
1) You will NOT tell me how many, or what kind of guns I own.
2) You will NOT tell me how I use, carry, handle, or store said firearms
3) You will NOT tell me when or whether I can take my kids shooting.
---If that is an issue for you, we're done here; this is a hard and immovable standard which will no be compromised on. Accept it 100% or walk---