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How out of shape did you get with your first kid?

Gustav7

Son of a Gun...
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Minuteman
  • Jul 18, 2019
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    Ohio (OH)
    So 2020 has been atrocious for my physical fitness. I've consistently worked out for about 12 years, and this is the longest I've ever taken off.

    Between COVID, and having our first kid last month, I've taken about 9 months off the gym.

    How out of shape did you get during your 1st/2nd/8th kid? What finally got you back into it?
     
    I worked out regularly before my first daughter was born 2.5 years ago. Worked out everyday for ten days while she was in the NICU. Haven’t stepped in a gym since the day I brought her home. So, don’t feel bad I guess!
     
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    I worked out regularly before my first daughter was born 2.5 years ago. Worked out everyday for ten days while she was in the NICU. Haven’t stepped in a gym since the day I brought her home. So, don’t feel bad I guess!

    Ya I'm going to try and work something into my life plan....albeit may not be a gym any more. I won't be going to an actual gym any time soon as the youngin is only a month old and the wife is a little worried with him being so young and COVID.

    I always kept a gym membership as I have always been unmotivated to workout at home and found it much more effective to drive to a gym, then once I was there, it was easier to get a good workout in. Buuuuuut we'll see how that plays out lol.

    At this point, if I wanted to workout for 45m, 3-4 days a week, that would basically eat up all the shooting time I do.
     
    Stayed in ok shape as camping, hunting, backpacking etc kept me so.
    But I didn't know i was out of shape until I was chasing grandkids.
     
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    Remember that round is still a shape!

    Got a little larger after my son, but was able to stay fairly fit. After my daughter was born things got worse. But now that my son is 8 we are able to ride bike longer, hike, camp and those things easier now.

    It will get better, but a dad bod is nothing to be ashamed of
     
    Practically zero after my first son was born - running was the only thing that kept me sane and helped me sleep.

    I started training for the Chicago Marathon when he was about 8 months old.

    My biggest issue today is I hurt my right knee about two months ago moving rip-rap around my pond and didn't know it; felt better and I went back to light running (2-3 miles) but ended up hurting it again and now after a MRI I'm told I have complex tears of the meniscus on the inside AND outside of my right knee.

    Ran just over one mile yesterday for the first time in about six weeks..no pain, a little tightness, but mobility is limited where I can't do a quad stretch. Going under the knife in a few weeks to get this shit fixed so I can get back out there ASAP.
     
    Practically zero after my first son was born - running was the only thing that kept me sane and helped me sleep.

    I started training for the Chicago Marathon when he was about 8 months old.

    My biggest issue today is I hurt my right knee about two months ago moving rip-rap around my pond and didn't know it; felt better and I went back to light running (2-3 miles) but ended up hurting it again and now after a MRI I'm told I have complex tears of the meniscus on the inside AND outside of my right knee.

    Ran just over one mile yesterday for the first time in about six weeks..no pain, a little tightness, but mobility is limited where I can't do a quad stretch. Going under the knife in a few weeks to get this shit fixed so I can get back out there ASAP.

    Woof that sounds miserable. My knees are pretty shitty from the Army, running usually does not agree with me well. I've thought about getting a road bike so I can just get some activity in. I also have a few good axes and a woods. Chopping wood for 30 min a day would be a lot better than nothing.


    Did you have a cesarean or vaginal birth?

    Recovery will take time in the first case.

    LOL, I had a C-section. Its been rough but my wife keeps telling me to stop being a pussy....
     
    The kids effect your physical shape because it becomes almost mandatory to prep some sort of kids diet.

    My kids initially ate great food but than as they get introduced to other kids/influences their diets included shit.

    Sure mac and cheese aint bad in moderation but when it is required to be a regular side just to ensure they eat something its not so good......

    It didnt effect them so much as it effected me.

    They seem to process the carb heavy diet okay through activity and growth but adults will pack on the pounds.

    Being too cheap to throw shit away it also meant I was eating stuff at dinner clean up rather than dumping it.

    Important to not let the kids diet become your diet.

    If you can keep the kids eating healthy food but still let them be kids go for it.

    If they are going to be typical kids dont let their high energy diet become your diet.

    Ive quit carbs now and totally avoid their rice, pasta, ice cream, pizza and whatever else is nothing but calories to be turned into fat.
     
    I actually have lost weight with both kids, but a lot of that is a result of leaving a shit job with 60 hr weeks and lots of fast food in between crises as the norm so now I have time to go on long walks, I wear a weighted pack and push the double stroller, we have lots of steep hills and I go for distance and speed. I’ve also found that the lack of sleep has kept me from wanting to drink as much, it sucks waking up with a sick kid at 0300 with a hangover. I pretty much only drink water and black coffee anymore so my liquid calories have gotten pretty low.
     
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    I can let you know when I get there. My son is 2 years old, and I've gained 30 pounds. I have a newborn as well.

    I used to go to the gym 5 days a week, and martial arts for several hours on top of that. Working a desk job, then rushing home to watch your kids all night, along with eating foods that they eat (chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, etc) will do a number on you.
     
    I’m a younger guy, so I didn’t see that much weight gain, but saw some fairly significant functional strength decreases due to lack of training.

    I’ve found that intake is the most important thing for me. Having healthy alternatives accessible so you don’t always eat what the kids are eating is key. I do protein/fruit/veggie shakes as fillers. Combining this with workouts/exercise incorporating the kids if possible works pretty good. Definitely harder than when single!
     
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    Well these are all good responses, although unfortunately what I thought I might find out about this journey.

    I think priorities lends a lot to what activity gets accomplished as well. We're obviously on a shooting forum so guns and shooting ranks pretty high with all of us probably.

    Working out used to be basically my life, and then I could shoot here and there. Reloading and shooting has only grown in its weight on my life so its always about what I want to do more now.

    My wife and I also don't really have "traditional" roles like my parents, so I'm very involved day to day with the kid and we take a 50/50 sort of approach. That being said the differences between men and women really shows during this time. Theres a few times she's been like,

    "Just give me the kid and go out to the barn or go shoot. Come back when your heads less busy".

    LOL. At least she knows me I guess.
     
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    I admittedly got out of shape when my kids came along, but it's not fair to place the blame on them - my job arrangement was a larger factor.

    As others have said, things will get easier as the kids get older and more active. Once my oldest got into mountain biking, it became easy to get in some additional light trail riding (and by towing my younger son on a tag-along behind my bike, I got some extra resistance). My gym offers a kids' fitness program, which is an extra hour of working out for me. Trail hiking with the Cub Scout den is exercise. Really, anything helps, and you'll probably need to adjust your schedule to take advantage of small opportunities as they pop up.

    While the child is young, it's still possible to remain active. Once the kid can hold its head upright, it's possible to load them into a backpack carrier for some hiking, and at about one year of age they should be ready for rides in Burley bike trailer. It's good for them, it's good for the parents. This innovation isn't going to be super-strenuous exercise, but this stage of parenting is a process of incremental gains (or losses, as it pertains to the waistline) so exploit the opportunity.

    It's also beneficial to make good use of mornings or evenings as dictated by the schedules of your wife and kid. Believe it or not, your child will eventually sleep through (most of) the night, and then you can figure out how to sneak in some workouts.

    Good luck, and welcome to fatherhood!
     
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    It's also beneficial to make good use of mornings or evenings as dictated by the schedules of your wife and kid. Believe it or not, your child will eventually sleep through (most of) the night, and then you can figure out how to sneak in some workouts.

    Good luck, and welcome to fatherhood!

    LOL I believe you, but we have quite the wakeful little dude. Sleeps good once he's asleep but he loves staying awake for long periods of time, often not fussy, but still. Makes getting his total sleep for the day difficult.

    My wife is having all sorts of issues breastfeeding so honestly I just feel bad for her.
     
    LOL I believe you, but we have quite the wakeful little dude. Sleeps good once he's asleep but he loves staying awake for long periods of time, often not fussy, but still. Makes getting his total sleep for the day difficult.

    My wife is having all sorts of issues breastfeeding so honestly I just feel bad for her.
    lol, you get let the baby have a bewb.
     
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    pretty out of shape...but just because I blew out a shoulder and couldn't touch a weight for a year and never adjusted my calories lol

    also, I never took pain killers before or after the surgery.....just a lot of scotch

    bench
     
    #3 turned 3YO yesterday, she slept all night around 16mos. It wasn’t the kids that caused the lack of workout it was stress from everything else, and the excuse. I hate working out, period. I do not go to bed until its done now. The last 6 months I have slept better and, felt better than I have in the last couple years. It’s just easy to come up
    With an excuse, no more.
     
    Congrats on the newborn!

    I think I've gained 10-15# in the three years since my daughter was born. Actually lost 5# in the three days after she was born - wife had delivery complications, was in the ICU for a couple days and very stressful potential outcome that thankfully turned out ok. Still dealing with fertility issues from those complications, which adds a whole other layer of stress onto regular life.

    I work a 9-5 desk job and my wife stays home with the kiddo, so my old habit of working out right when I got home from work flew out the window. Now I get home and go into dad mode until she goes to bed. And my motivation to work out at 8pm after being up for 14 hours is approximately ZERO haha.

    We're a pretty active family though, so we go on hikes, take the kiddo on bike rides, play in the backyard, stuff like that. I have a backpack kid carrier so that whoops my butt on hikes carrying 30#. The biggest thing for me is diet - we eat healthy but I have a sweet tooth and when times get stressful I gravitate toward carbs and sweets. If I ate clean I bet I'd be at the same weight as three years ago.

    I'm still waiting for my excuses to stop and to start working out again in regular. But the day to day stress, along with trying to shoot matches and run a side business makes it easy to keep making excuses haha.
     
    I think priorities lends a lot to what activity gets accomplished as well. We're obviously on a shooting forum so guns and shooting ranks pretty high with all of us probably.

    Working out used to be basically my life, and then I could shoot here and there. Reloading and shooting has only grown in its weight on my life so its always about what I want to do more now.

    My wife and I also don't really have "traditional" roles like my parents, so I'm very involved day to day with the kid and we take a 50/50 sort of approach. That being said the differences between men and women really shows during this time. Theres a few times she's been like,

    "Just give me the kid and go out to the barn or go shoot. Come back when your heads less busy".

    I think you've nailed it here. You have to react to shifting priorities, so working out and shooting have to take a smaller role, but DON'T give them up! In a few years you'll find that the kids may take an interest in the things you like, so you'll wind up doing them together.

    It's good to hear that you're so active with the kids. IMO being part of the regular, day to day stuff is more important than just being there at school recitals or other "events". The day to day activities you all do together is what creates your family culture/identity, so being elbows-deep in that stuff will make you all closer in the long run.

    The good news is that as the kids get older, they become less needy, so you'll be able to increase the time again for the other activities (and the kids may be doing them with you).
     
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    Im glad I stumbled upon this thread. I have a 14 month old, but prior to her I would lift 3-5 days a week, Climbing 5.11+, back country ski tours, etc. I have not really "gained" weight, but I have deconditioned dramatically (thanks fruited sours and bourbon).

    It has been very hard on me mentally. I want to be the strong father figure she needs, but often dont have the motivation (or is it energy?) for the workouts.

    My wife and I work opposite schedules, so between COVID closing the gyms, my only real opportunity is to try and spin or swing kettle bells during her naps.

    Im going to watch this thread for motivation and ideas. I need to do something so I can keep up now that shes running and climbing on everything.
     
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    Im glad I stumbled upon this thread. I have a 14 month old, but prior to her I would lift 3-5 days a week, Climbing 5.11+, back country ski tours, etc. I have not really "gained" weight, but I have deconditioned dramatically (thanks fruited sours and bourbon).

    It has been very hard on me mentally. I want to be the strong father figure she needs, but often dont have the motivation (or is it energy?) for the workouts.

    My wife and I work opposite schedules, so between COVID closing the gyms, my only real opportunity is to try and spin or swing kettle bells during her naps.

    Im going to watch this thread for motivation and ideas. I need to do something so I can keep up now that shes running and climbing on everything.

    I feel you man. As soon as this kid gets on a little better schedule I think I'm gonna try to just start slow. Walks through the woods, chopping some wood by hand, etc. Eventually I'll get back in a gym, and once the little guy is running around, its backpacking and hiking time.
     
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    Me an my wife used to look good, I stalked the iron-pile 6x a week.. Now I’m a dad, my oldest is 5 and I’m getting a dad bod.. I’m not a slob tho, I do construction in the Carolina heat😆 Family time is more important to me than spending time on my body, and being in bondage 24/7 to what I’m eating, or not eating.. I don’t stress in the summer but In the winter/spring/fall I always pick it back up here and there..BTW my wife still looks good, she’s more hardcore than me
     
    I'd say I went up about 20 lbs. That was after I quit soda even. I will say that I also got more of a desky job as well which didn't help things along.

    I was never into working out before, but I started in the last couple years. Really miss the gym at this point I should be going out and at least doing basic stuff instead of couch potatoing through my days.

    There's so many things to do in life we have to find our balances. It's not easy with children. I tend to spend a lot of time with mine as he's stubborn and doesn't really like to do homework so I have to sit him down and make him do it. Really knocks into the time to do other stuff.
     
    Had first child 4 months ago. Up about 15lbs. Also recovering from a torn mcl which doesn’t help.
     
    Uhhhh...I'm in the best shape of my life and would easily whoop the shit out of my 25 year old self.
    I'm stronger, faster now than I was single in the army living in the gym.

    I have a single, twins, and another on the way. I lift 3 days a week and roll 2-3 days a week... Wife and I coordinate everything we both work full time. I tag her in and she tags me in so we can both meet our goals and obligations.

    I'm up at 630 and go to bed at midnight

    Meal prep is key to save time
    Keep your work outs simple 5x5 or gvt

    Where there is a will there is a way... You gotta want it.

    Enjoy your journey wherever you are on your path to where you want to be
     
    I am skinny no matter what i eat, i couldn't add a little weight o save my life, I simply try to eat right and work the treadmill.
     
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    My kids are 3.5 and 2 but I was able to keep going to the gym after the first was born, I worked nights and went straight to the gym for a bit then slept so I didn’t change too much. Since the younger kid was born, I’ve changed to normal human hours and haven’t been to the gym once. I can keep my diet good enough and stay active enough at work and chasing them around that I haven’t gotten excessively gross. We’re starting to check into different gyms in our area with childcare options so we can start being a little more active
     
    I recommend every new father put some weights, KBs and/or DBs and an assault bike (or implement of choice) in their garage or back porch. Hit it hard about 3 days a week and try to not to eat like an asshole.

    I had twins girls and my wife committed to breastfeeding them exclusively for the first 6 months. I am pretty sure I didn't sleep more than 45 minutes at any one stretch for the first 3 months. I had no gray hair going into it and came out with some gray streaks. Funny part is I have less gray hair now 8 years later than I had coming out of that 3 months of sleep deprivation.

    Remember, it is easier to recover from intensity than volume. Hit some heavy singles, doubles or triples on compound movements, do a bunch of pull ups, push ups and rows and crush some calories on the Assault or Echo bike and call it good.

    13
     
    The real secret is to do your best to maintain the farther you slide from your peak the harder you will have to work to get back to that.
     
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    The real secret is to do your best to maintain the farther you slide from your peak the harder you will have to work to get back to that.

    I'm way past maintaining... However I am starting to get back to some physical activity. Work is picking up more, so at minimum i'm walking around properties. I started chopping wood a couple days a week. I have 3 acres of woods, so its easy to find a dead tree or shitty species that needs culled. Felling 18" oak tree with a 4lb Jersey Axe will kick your ass.....well, it kicked my ass lol.

    We're getting there, slowly.

    IMG_5156.JPG
     
    I went from a 6ft 205 gym rat to a 6ft 300lb fatty. It took two kids and 8 years to slowly turn into a pathetic excuse of a man. I picked up a side job at Amazon and I've lost 30lbs so now I'm at 270. Problem is I hit the plateau where diet and working at amazon isn't getting me below that. I have to get to the gym but damn knowing what I use to do and what I can't do anymore keeps me away.
     
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    Was 390 when my son was born. 290 by the time he was 3. 270 when my daughter was born, and now 247 for the third baby due any day now. My lowest weight was 229. Been a hard year. Trying to keep losing but after 3 years of strict diet, I’ve kinda let it slip. My height (6’3”) helps to conceal the weight.
     
    Was 390 when my son was born. 290 by the time he was 3. 270 when my daughter was born, and now 247 for the third baby due any day now. My lowest weight was 229. Been a hard year. Trying to keep losing but after 3 years of strict diet, I’ve kinda let it slip. My height (6’3”) helps to conceal the weight.
    That’s awesome. What does your plan look like?
     
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    That’s awesome. What does your plan look like?

    I started with caloric restriction paired with cardio for the first 75 or so pounds then switched to average to below average calorie intake and heavy lifting.

    I haven’t really had a plan this year. I have been hitting the gym without any frequency and have been trying to maintain, but doesn’t seem to be working. I really just wanted to take a year off and let my body have a break. Plus taking a job as an OTR truck driver really messed me up. Although I didn’t gain, I developed some really bad craving habits.

    ive lost a considerable amount of muscle due to not going to the gym 5 days a week and lifting. So my conditioning is pretty bad right now.

    I lost all this weight to be able to enjoy my family and be active and to eventually join the Air Force. My plan is to be 20 pounds down by feb 15 for a meeting with a recruiter.

    first born = heaviest
    Second born = midway
    fishpic with first born = best shape of my life
     

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    Life is a funny thing.

    In my youth I worked out to attract girls and make sure I could compete physically with my peers. I have shit genetics on both sides of my gene pool so I spent decades learning combat sports to compensate for weakness in muscle mass. I'm glad I did that. Taught me that good strength and great cardio can win over gigantic muscles.

    When my first child was born I realized that other stuff wasn't so important.

    My exercise routine has changed dramatically over the years. Now I stay in the best shape possible so I can do whatever my kids (and potential grandkids) may want to do when we have "TIME" together.

    Time is a precious and fleeting commodity,. If they want to do something but I'm not physically able, that opportunity may never come again. So in my 50's now (fuck me...) I make sure I'm physically able to do whatever they can.

    Don't be a fat fuck should be a poster in every mans room. If you're currently one, curb your eating habits and increase your exercise until you're no longer one.
     
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    This is a more complex question than it seems.
    Yes, kids leave less time to exercise, less time to sleep (which affect metabolism).
    An important thing to consider is how old are you when your kids are born. Your age affects important factors too regardless of kids.
    Last aspect that changes overtime is in my opinion mindset... I always exercised but growing older I am more motivated to stay combat ready, to be able to do things with my kids and potentially grandchildren for as long as I can with a performance that is close to my prime.
    So in the end a lot of folks in their 40ties are in better overall shape than in their 20ties because they are more motivated, disciplined partly because they had kids a few years back.
     
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    So in the end a lot of folks in their 40ties are in better overall shape than in their 20ties because they are more motivated, disciplined partly because they had kids a few years back.

    I agree to a point, I know my body so much better in my thirties, I train way smarter. However, I am not as durable as I was in my early 20's when I could take punishing workouts day in and day out. I could like many afford to be sloppy with my routine as well. It's harder to maintain running speed and muscle mass.