How to take a shit in the woods...

#5
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

My favorite is when you are in MOPP and you just have to shit and piss all over yourself in the middle of the summer in Iraq and just fester in it until the all clear is sounded...just can't beat it.
 
#6
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: rrflyer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">oh there's a whole book out titled the same!

Funny reading.
</div></div>

+1... I bought it at our local hiking store. Besides "How to Sh*t in the Woods", there is another one called "Having SEX in the Woods".

Both are hilarious.
 
#7
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

Pack it out with you...Please. Scoop some dirt, leaves or snow over it and move along down the trail.

I dropped my subscriptions to Field and Stream and Outdoor life because of their quasi gay fealty to global warming, no camp fires, too few gun articles and other pussification that runs rampant today.

When it comes to excrement, I'm donating my shit to the ecosystem, like the bears and other critters, and won't be holding hands with some snowboarding meat gazer in order to complete a weight loss operation in the forrest.
 
#11
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

I always used the tree lean method , just squat down , lean your back against the tree and let'r rip . Just make sure you get your clothes all the way out of range and if its steep make sure you use the uphill side so it doesn't roll into the back of your boots or pant legs . Years of backpacking will teach you some valuable life lessons
wink.gif
 
#12
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ArcticLight</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

If you pack it in, you pack it out.. </div></div>

Wanna bet?!??!?!!



TP is one thing...especially in the desert as it doesn't go away as quickly but my poo stays where it lays.
 
#13
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Michael N</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I always used the tree lean method , just squat down , lean your back against the tree and let'r rip . Just make sure you get your clothes all the way out of range and if its steep make sure you use the uphill side so it doesn't roll into the back of your boots or pant legs . Years of backpacking will teach you some valuable life lessons
wink.gif
</div></div>

^ +1
 
#14
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ArcticLight</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Try it at 50 below.

If you pack it in, you pack it out.. </div></div>

I was on a drill rig at -50*F one time. Did you know that at that temperature spit freezes and crackles before it can hit the deck?
 
#15
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. The bear leaned turned and said to the rabbit: "Rabbit, do you ever have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit said "Why no,bear, I do not!"
So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
Good Night.
 
#16
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Semour Gunz</div><div class="ubbcode-body">A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. The bear leaned turned and said to the rabbit: "Rabbit, do you ever have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit said "Why no,bear, I do not!"
So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
Good Night. </div></div>

ROFL lol
 
#17
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Semour Gunz</div><div class="ubbcode-body">A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. The bear leaned turned and said to the rabbit: "Rabbit, do you ever have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit said "Why no,bear, I do not!"
So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
Good Night. </div></div>

You might owe me a keyboard after that one. LOL
 
#18
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Victor N TN</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ArcticLight</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Try it at 50 below.

If you pack it in, you pack it out.. </div></div>

I was on a drill rig at -50*F one time. Did you know that at that temperature spit freezes and crackles before it can hit the deck? </div></div>

BrimFrost 1989 unofficially hit 87 below zero, but contrary to popular belief taking a piss does not freeze mid stream. It still took about 10 minutes to freeze solid....

So I dunno...I'm just saying, never saw that happen! LOL
smile.gif
 
#19
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BOLTRIPPER</div><div class="ubbcode-body">a good bowel movement is highly under-rated</div></div>

+1
 
#20
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Frank Cordrey</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BOLTRIPPER</div><div class="ubbcode-body">a good bowel movement is highly under-rated</div></div>

+1 </div></div>

I like the ones when your done and your pants actually fit better !
grin.gif
 
#22
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

I'm sorry, but if you need to read a book on how to shit or F in the woods, you have no business being there!
Ain't gonna hold hands with a guy while taking one or pack it!
Sitting on a limb of a blow down is just like home.
(Might want to check for snakes first.)
No trees?
Drop and squat.
(make sure Willey is pointed in a safe direction!)

Sex in the woods... Come on, what is there to figure out?

Maybe we should be writting the books.
 
#23
Re: How to take a shit in the woods...

LMAO!! Someone actually wrote this shit!

THE BUDDY SYSTEM:
Also known as the “Team Steam,” this is the most advanced of all methods, and involves another person, whom you must completely trust. If not, the Buddy System can quickly turn into the “Muddy System” for you and your poo-pal. Simply drop your pants simultaneously (while looking straight ahead, perv), interlock your fingers extra tight, lean back, lock your arms, and let ’er rip. It’s a “You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours” technique that allows you to double-time a double-deuce.
 
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