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Pick up lines that work

Maggot

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood"
Supporter
Full Member
Minuteman
  • Jul 27, 2007
    25,905
    29,191
    Virginia
    I liked the one about the Polar Bear. Lets hear yours.

    They’re the worst pick-up lines... and yet, these seemingly awful come-ons actually managed to charm women. It just goes to show you, romance is always full of surprises. Read on and pick up an idea or two, guys.

    1. The corny-but-cute hello:
    “This guy who was so not my style came over to me and my friends and asked: ‘Do you happen to know how much a polar bear weighs?’ We said ‘no’ and kept walking, and then he said, ‘Well, it’s enough to break the ice. Hi, I’m Brian.’ We all cracked up and kept talking to him.”
    — Charity, 29, Cincinnati, OH

    2. The line with artistic flair:
    “I was shooting pool with friends, and some guys offered us a friendly challenge. Midway through the game, one of them looked at me and said, ‘Do you remember Crayola crayons? Well, they used to have this color called Blizzard Blue. It was my favorite color, and your eyes are actually Blizzard Blue.’ I thought it was so cute! He had me right there.”
    — Erica, 21, Brunswick, OH

    3. The overly confident come-on:
    “I was at an office party when a guest of a coworker introduced himself and said, ‘Blueberries or strawberries?’ Confused, I asked what he meant, and he replied, ‘I just want to know what kind of pancakes to make you in the morning.’ He said it with such a straight face that it was like a scene in a funny movie. I didn’t eat breakfast with him, but I did give him my number.”
    — Jan, 33, Cleveland, OH Browse Local Singles at Match.com on Yahoo!
    I am a: Man Woman Seeking a: Man Woman Near: 4. The nonsensical approach:
    “This random guy came up to me at a party, looked me straight in the eyes and said, ‘Baby, you’re sexier than socks on a rooster.’ I had absolutely no idea what he meant, but I thought it was funny and I liked how unusual it was. It got us talking, trying to figure out what that line meant!”
    — Holly, 19, Milford, OH

    5. The mom-approved intro:
    “I was at a local bar one night, and this guy sat next to me and said, ‘Would it freak you out if I said that I’ve already told my mother about you?’ I said, ‘No, why?’ Then he told me that he’d actually stepped outside, called his mother and asked her how to approach me. I thought it was adorable that he was a mama’s boy.”
    — Michelle, 25, Erie, PA

    6. The “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” method:
    “I fought tooth and nail with a guy over a parking space and won. When I came back out to my car, there was a note on it that said, ‘I like your style. Call me.’ It was very unexpected, and I loved the approach. See, it pays to be a lover and a fighter.”
    — Lynn, 36, Boston, MA

    7. The win-her-with-flattery strategy:
    “This poker party I was at started to get very crowded. As a group of girls walked in, this guy came up behind me and said, ‘I think you’re going to be asked to leave soon. You’re so pretty, you’re putting all the other women to shame.’ I tend to be very shy, so his compliment really helped crack my shell.”
    — Katie, 31, Chicago, IL
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Now that I am married my only pick up line is while I am taking a leak to ask my wife if she wants any before I put it away....
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I was at a bar with some friends just after I turned 21. There was an attractive woman in her late thirties sitting at the corner of the bar. She kept looking over towards our table and we assumed she ws looking at our friend Mike who was the proverbial well built pretty boy. We watched as several guys approached her and appeared to offer to buy her a drink and she blew them off. She would glance over at our table on occasion and we finally got Mike to approach her after he had a few drinks down. He walked over and sat next to her at the bar and introduced himslef and offered to buy her a drink. She shut him down as fast as the other that had approached her. He came back to the table and told us she simply told him no thanks and didn't say another word.

    I had consumed just enough liquid courage (or stupid juice) at this point that I simply got up and walked over to her. I leaned against the bar next to her and said, "someone just needs to grab you by the back of your hair, bend you over, and f**k you mean". She replied by asking me if I was going to buy her a drink first. After I regained my composure I quickly bought her the that drink. The rest is a long story but the pick up line worked and it wasn't even intended to be pickup line.

    I have never used that line again for fear of being slapped or doused with a beverage. Should anyone ever decide to try it I am in no way responsible or liable for the action taken by the recipient of said line!
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I was at a club my sophomore year of college and these two bros(loud, obnoxious, insecure assholes with daddy issues who join frats) got into a fight near a corner. Two girl wound up being trapped in the corner by the fight and just stood there looking terrified. I walked over, grabbed both of them by the arms, and yanked them out of the corner and put them behind me to keep them from being hurt just as the two idiots fighting wound up slamming into that corner while they were grappling. Their worthless dates were standing right there cheering on the fight. Didn't say a word to either of them, I turned around and walked out of the club and they wound up following me out and giving me their names and numbers.

    Sometimes you don't have to say a word, you just have to be a gentleman.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    This one is cheesy, but does work more often than not. "If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents."
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    You're on top of it
    g.gif
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    "Hey, can you tell me where they're holding the sexual olympics this year? I'm a finalist in the nine-hour multi-orgasm freestyle competition."
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    You have to keep it simple so they can follow the punch line, short so that there is no confusion, and an atypical compliment always helps. Be confident with your words and maintain eye contact.

    In other words look her in the eye and say, "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"
    The attention towards her shoes guarantees success if there was ever a chance.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Works every time. When ata restuarant and you see a woman that catches your eye at a table with her friends. Send them a round of waters. Tell the waiter or waitress to say they are all on you. Telling you it works ...
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Who needs pick up lines, I was in my blues for a friends wedding went out to the bar afterwards. I walked past a table and was asked to come join, at the table was a chick in her late 20's ad her parents. Her dad did all the talking for me and about 30 minutes after joining the table he and the wife left and said make sure my daughter gets home safe and enjoy. Easier score I've ever had.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Just shove an Idaho potato down your pants.

    *Notes on use: make SURE you shove it down the front, not the back......
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    nice shoes.

    works everytime.

    rich
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    or you can just flat out ask them if they shave their pussy. this one is a good conversation starter in the right setting.

    of course all these lines work if you have straight teeth and you dont look like an idiot.

    rich
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SSG3K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">or you can just flat out ask them if they shave their pussy. this one is a good conversation starter in the right setting.

    of course all these lines work if you have straight teeth and you dont look like an idiot.

    rich</div></div>

    I used to start w/ "excuse me, but are you wearing panties"...

    follow w/ what style, what color, etc, etc....

    believe it or not, it works... in the right setting
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: JCH</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Now that I am married my only pick up line is while I am taking a leak to ask my wife if she wants any before I put it away.... </div></div>

    BAHAHAHAHA!!!
    laugh.gif
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    "Was your father a meat burglar? Cause it looks like someone stole 2 fine hams, and shoved them down the back of your pants."

    "Hey, can I buy you a fish sandwich and some courvoisier?"
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I have a magic watch, it says you're not wearing panties.
    "but I am wearing panties"
    Huh...must be an hour fast...
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I used the "I'd be willing to lose a few hours of sleep with you" quote from Iron Man one time after some conversation was underway. It worked well enough for me.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Came out of a Motel Lounge once and there was a hottie working @ the Hotel Registry desk ..( Holiday Inn - Nacadoches,Tx ) ...told one of my buddies , man ,I'd suck her pussy till her Tits caved in..... she overheard me and had one of the workers see what room I was staying in ... she gave me Room service after she got off work ;-)
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Years ago I dumped my buds off at the barracks and went back out to the bar on my own for some late night solo drinking. I grabbed the only empty seat at the bar without even noticing the chick in the seat next to me. After I ordered a beer and a jager, I looked to my left and was staring straight at a big ol rack. I could tell she was watching me look at her but, I never looked her in the eye. I sat back straight up looking across the bar and announced to her, "Nice tits". The first words out of her mouth were, "That was the coolest pickup line I've ever heard". Your mileage may vary.

    Bob
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    "Hello love, say, can I smell your pussy?"
    "No!"
    "Oh, must be your feet then..."

    Works 100% of the time, 60% of the time...
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SSG3K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">nice shoes.

    works everytime.

    rich </div></div>
    +1000... chicks always have some story with their shoes.. suffer through the story and she should be two deep into some drinks by the end and open for anything..
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: EventHorizon</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Hello love, say, can I smell your pussy?"
    "No!"
    "Oh, must be your feet then..."

    Works 100% of the time, 60% of the time... </div></div>

    Now that shit is funny!!

    Bob
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: athhud</div><div class="ubbcode-body">You have to keep it simple so they can follow the punch line, short so that there is no confusion, and an atypical compliment always helps. Be confident with your words and maintain eye contact.

    In other words look her in the eye and say, "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"
    The attention towards her shoes guarantees success if there was ever a chance.
    </div></div>

    And hence the advent of the "f*ck-me" shoes...ever girl has a pair of 'em, even the "nice girls".
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: thehjot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Does this smell like chloroform?"

    Hasn't let me down yet... </div></div>

    LOL !
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: VJJPunisher</div><div class="ubbcode-body">if you were a booger id pick you first</div></div>

    Lmao damn that cracked me up VJ.

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: thehjot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Does this smell like chloroform?"

    Hasn't let me down yet...</div></div>

    Hall pass hehe.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    "Your shirt would go great with my floor."

    "Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one."

    And in case they aren't that great or you need to make them go away,

    "You look like I need another beer."
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    "That shirt looks very becoming on you, of course if I were on you i'd be cumming"
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I was on spring break during my collee years and just asked this chick “do you want to fuck”, she said “yes” and we did.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Brother used this one, "You are like my little toe.......... small, cute, and I'm going to bang you on the couch later."
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    These always get a laugh or a strange look.

    Wanna go halves on a baby?

    I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: thehjot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Does this smell like chloroform?"

    Hasn't let me down yet... </div></div>

    along the lines of "Get in the Van- I have a gun"
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: gathert</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Your shirt would go great with my floor."

    "Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one."

    And in case they aren't that great or you need to make them go away,

    "You look like I need another beer." </div></div>

    "How about a 77? It's like a 69 but you get ate more!"
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Put out or swim!

    You ever picked any corn?
    yeah, why?
    Because you'll be shuckin' them drawers later on tonight!

    I was at a bar one time and made eye contact with this cute girl that was standing around a table with a group of her girl friends. I gave her the "come here" signal with my finger like your mom would do when you were a little kid. She looked at me, walked over and said "What?" I said "I just wanted to see if I could make you cum with one finger." She came home with me that night and we ended up dating for about 3 months, I just thought I was going to get slapped.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    I usually stutter, stammer, start shaking, and get blurred vision all while still sitting in the corner contemplating talking to one.

    It doesn't work... ever ... Not ever

    If I had the courage: Can I buy ya a drink, or would you rather have the cash.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    Let's play Turkey....... You squat, and I'll gobble!

    or,

    Get 2 beers from the bar, walk up to a chick and ask her to "please hold these for a second, then when her hands are full, grab 2 handfuls of tit. It will either break the ice, or you'll get slapped. Works 50% of the time in the right setting.
     
    Re: Pick up lines that work

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Switchblade</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Hawaii, early 80's, worked great everywhere:
    Hi, wanna fuck? Got laid way more that I got swung at too!</div></div>

    You aren't kidding...

    I had a roommate c. 1984 who used to walk up to every girl in the bar and say "So you want it, or what?" Nine out of ten times, he got slapped. But he always took a good one home.

    Never had the cojones to use that line myself...

    Cheers,

    Sirhr.