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Plz help newly single dad trying to re introduce daughter to guns

shootindude

Sergeant
Full Member
Minuteman
Oct 5, 2011
232
0
42
in the back country of Oregon
I know it's a hell of a long shot, my daughter was involved in a very traumatic incident involving a gun. She's 5 yrs old but prior to this she was very involved in hunting with me and has a couple 22 rifles she loves to shoot. The incident had happened last Saturday but she has been trying to talk about wanting to go shooting already, I have removed most pictures or anything having to do with guns or shooting from our every day life but with her wanting to do this so much I'm not sure how to re introduce it in a well manner and before u say not a good spot to discuss it I have tried talking to her counselor about it but we live in a very liberal area. So there's not many instances where this would come up. Maybe if anyone knew of a resource place that may have suggestions it would be awesome. Thanks fellow hiders
 
I know it's a hell of a long shot, my daughter was involved in a very traumatic incident involving a gun. She's 5 yrs old but prior to this she was very involved in hunting with me and has a couple 22 rifles she loves to shoot. The incident had happened last Saturday but she has been trying to talk about wanting to go shooting already, I have removed most pictures or anything having to do with guns or shooting from our every day life but with her wanting to do this so much I'm not sure how to re introduce it in a well manner and before u say not a good spot to discuss it I have tried talking to her counselor about it but we live in a very liberal area. So there's not many instances where this would come up. Maybe if anyone knew of a resource place that may have suggestions it would be awesome. Thanks fellow hiders

What happened?
 
I'd say you're 99% of the way there with her wanting to shoot again. I wouldn't even go there (yet) if she didn't.
 
...but she has been trying to talk about wanting to go shooting already...

Don't really know what to say 5yrs old is a touchy age for influence..

I'm hoping your not "newly single" as a result of said "traumatic experience"..

If not

If she falls off a bike are you going to take it away and never let her ride again even while she's bugging you to ride it again??..

Accidents/things happen learn from it and teach her. You can't stop life because of it.

She needs to know guns aren't evil even while the liberal pukes will try and convince her otherwise and at 5yrs could be easily accomplished.

A MAJOR good luck to you on this fragile situation.
 
Her mom was in a domestic violence situation with her new husband who ended up murdering her mother in front of her with a gun. This is y it's a pretty sensitive subject with her but I don't want to keep her from something we've always done but I'm not sure how to approach it yet
 
Her mom was in a domestic violence situation with her new husband who ended up murdering her mother in front of her with a gun. This is y it's a pretty sensitive subject with her but I don't want to keep her from something we've always done but I'm not sure how to approach it yet

I hope you've found a good therapist to give your daughter an outlet to discuss that trauma. If you haven't found one yet, start looking now and don't stop until you find a good one. Then stay in very close contact with that therapist and move your daughter along at her speed. That traumatic experience may or may not impact her desire to shoot, but I'd be very hesitant to introduce any shooting unless she expressly wants to, which she's doing. Since she's talking about it, doing some 22LR target shooting may be a cathartic outlet for her.

Very sorry to hear about this tragedy with your daughter and ex-wife.
 
Yes, very sorry to hear of this happening. Absolutely.

That said, it is only my opinion, but you 'removing' any pictures of firearms and whatnot, only goes to supporting the premise that it is the firearm that is the bad thing.

Which can't be more wrong, (???) It was not the firearm that was the negative, it was the deranged individual and his actions. If a person were in a car accident, would anyone suggest removing all vehicles to 'get over the trauma'?

I'm sorry, but demonizing the wrong thing would only make things worse, from my perspective. Take that for what it's worth. I'm not a doctor, and I don't play one on tv. Now, in the privacy of my own home....... ;)
 
Yes I understand I'm not wanting to demonize the gun, mainly him. We're going to a pumpkin patch today n she wants to shoot the pumpkin cannons so we will see how she responds to that n then off to the 22lr, she was in with the best therapist they could find the very next day. There has been a huge outpouring of help thus far, the tough part has been more with me I guess than her, such a changing event I guess I might be a lil over protective of any situation since she had to go through that. One positive part I guess is that since she sat with her mom and tried to clean it up she understands that a gun or any weapon like that does cause damage and is lethal, and the effects that it has, not just on animals. So with her asking about guns and shooting I've been just trying to explain that guns don't always have that effect per say and we only shoot targets and when we hunt we only shoot the animal that we eat. It's been a long week to say the least
 
I agree with Sean, teach her guns aren't not the bad thing. I have a four year old girl and its amazing how much they understand and can comprehend.
If it were me I'd talk about shooting with her and maybe just take her along while some friends are shooting and see how she reacts. She may find therapy in shooting. And you definitaley one day when the time is right teach her how to defend herself from SOB's like the one that murdered her mom. May he rot in hell. Hopefully
He is already there or will be there soon.
 
having worked with junior shooters for more years than i care to remember i suggest finding a local program/group that has a large program for kids. find out how young they support. a group program with kids her age/sex will ease both of your minds.
 
Oh for sure on the defense shooting, in fact 2 of my buddies that are pistol trainers for the dept locally are donating there weekend for a free class for all of her friends and is going to teach defense techniques and issue there ccw permits all free of charge.
 
I agree with Sean, teach her guns aren't not the bad thing. I have a four year old girl and its amazing how much they understand and can comprehend.
If it were me I'd talk about shooting with her and maybe just take her along while some friends are shooting and see how she reacts. She may find therapy in shooting. And you definitaley one day when the time is right teach her how to defend herself from SOB's like the one that murdered her mom. May he rot in hell. Hopefully
He is already there or will be there soon.

He's not there yet, however he's trying to stay in solitary, he truly doesn't want to be sent to gp as it's been pretty much well known fact time is limited in there. He hasn't made many friends with this.
 
Very very sorry to hear your about your tragedy. Also very glad too that your daughter was not harmed physically. My wife is a Kindergarten teacher, her degree focused heavily on early childhood development. Without her education I would not have survived my daughters early years. She has told me many times that their brains are not developed like ours and they don't think or reason like adults, they are able to suppress things they don't grasp. This is why very young that are abused don't remember until later in life. Once the brain can wrap itself around what happened it can/will come back to the surface. It is a self defense mechanism for the brain. She will/does need some counseling/therapy. Shooting if done properly can be an outlet.
 
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Don't have any advise as I'm no doctor and childless. I did want to wish you good luck in your endeavor though. It will be a tough road I'm sure, but it seems like she still has a father that cares, and that is half the battle. Just keep loving that little one!