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Things your wife/gf does that piss you off

Pastor asked me what frustration do you have with your soon to be wife during a premarital session. I said her continual tardiness to everything we do and I mean everything. He smiled. Fast forward to the wedding day 4 o'clock wedding and at 4:15 no bride and everyone wandering around an starting to think she got smart and bailed. Told Pastor give it another few minutes. Silver Grand Maquis slides to a stop outside the church at 4:20 and Pastor looks at me smiles and said I understand your frustration now. Has not changed in 22 years I just move the arrival time up 30 minutes so we get there close to on time.
You have some serious patience! I imagine you have weighed things pretty hard. My wife will hang up in the am while traveling, and of coarse needs a sit down breakfast, so we are never first. Once moving, she or I will never be late.
I actually have only kept one friend who cannot be punctual, crap drives me bat shit crazy. A wife is different, but when someone is constantly late, they are more less informing you their time is far more important than yours.
 
Some of you all dont know this, but I recently became single. Short story is she wasnt as ready as she thought she was for a serious fella to step in and be a man.
Great lady. Heart of gold, very smart, gorgeous. Just didnt work.

My next go at a serious relationship is going to love sitting by me in church every Sunday morning, love my little angel like her own, have me as king and her as queen, annoy me by wanting to give me too many blow jobs, asking me to run the smoker or grill regularly, baking me too many tasty treats, and encouraging me to go camping, hunting, and fishing a lot.

If she encourages or joins in whiskey consumption that would suck......

And of course encouraging me to get a Dillion 650 to reload more from shooting so much ammo up. ?

Oh. If not, I will just stay single.

So, anyone wanna make a wager when I will find this unicorn? ?
 
Can't follow directions for shit.
We new her car needed brakes and some suspension work so I told her to go by the Subaru dealership get a diagnostic and QUOTE ONLY, I was looking for the part numbers of what we needed so I could do the work and then just take the in for alignment.
She went and got t ripped off $320.00 for brake pad replacement...

SMH....
 
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Some of you all dont know this, but I recently became single. Short story is she wasnt as ready as she thought she was for a serious fella to step in and be a man.
Great lady. Heart of gold, very smart, gorgeous. Just didnt work.

My next go at a serious relationship is going to love sitting by me in church every Sunday morning, love my little angel like her own, have me as king and her as queen, annoy me by wanting to give me too many blow jobs, asking me to run the smoker or grill regularly, baking me too many tasty treats, and encouraging me to go camping, hunting, and fishing a lot.

If she encourages or joins in whiskey consumption that would suck......

And of course encouraging me to get a Dillion 650 to reload more from shooting so much ammo up. ?

Oh. If not, I will just stay single.

So, anyone wanna make a wager when I will find this unicorn? ?
---Shortly after you completely stop looking for such. I kid you not. That is exactly how it worked for me. Truth-be-told, (and I've stated here previously through the years) I'd 'had it up to here' with gold-digging, scheming, conniving, using, dastardly bitches that I just changed my outlook to "all women can't be trusted AT ALL,,,,, so keep away"..... and then I met My Lady in university. (I was in my mid-30's and focusing on a career-change). She was interested, but I 'didn't trust women' so I kept pushing her away. She kept coming back. I started 'testing' her, and she kept on coming back.

To the point where 'it got rough/ugly' (remember, women can't be trusted) and she kept coming back. THAT'S when I saw that she truly didn't have any ulterior motives.... and that she honestly was Real/Honest/True/Good/Wholesome/Perfect For Me. We continued to go to church, and the range, we reloaded together, and tackled everything together.

Then we eloped, because neither of us saw the logic in wasting a whole whack of money on a 'party' for others. Believe me, we've had some rough times (due to external circumstances) that included lawyers/courts etc, and though it took more than a year to get to the end of that, she stuck with me through it all.

So yeah, believe me when I tell you, they DO exist,,,, just rare, and only seen when you stop looking. Keep going to church. You won't find em many other places.
:)
 
@Sean the Nailer

I wasnt looking when the last one found me.
She is a great lady, just cant figure out how to sort the baggage quite yet.
I cant demand or push it, it has to be from within.

I can have dreams. Certainly am not going to look.
As for the rest. Im gonna live my life, doing what I was put here by the Good Lord to do.
If a lady likes that, good. Lets have a cup of coffee and visit.

Glad you found a good one.
They are rare. Treasure her every day! (I know you do!)
 
I choose not to answer this, because she is a gem. Yes , there are "THINGS". However the list on her side is likely voluminous, and she lets me play with toys that make noise, so all is R E L A T I V E L Y good!
 
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You have some serious patience! I imagine you have weighed things pretty hard. My wife will hang up in the am while traveling, and of coarse needs a sit down breakfast, so we are never first. Once moving, she or I will never be late.
I actually have only kept one friend who cannot be punctual, crap drives me bat shit crazy. A wife is different, but when someone is constantly late, they are more less informing you their time is far more important than yours.

As with all relationships that last there is give and take. I am patient and in turn she accepts my piles of shooting equipment and the enormous amount of time and money I spend on it. I was gone 3 consecutive weeks last fall hunting and she managed 4 kids and everything else without complaint. An God knows I have other faults that she has managed to live with too. She may not be perfect but might darn close for me.
 
1. Crams more shit in the garbage than the garbage can hold. If it's full take the fucker out. Bags are cheap.
2. Or after the garbage is overflowing decides to actually take it out, but wait it now has room in it to shove more shit in it, so it sits next to the garbage tell it's over flowing. Take the fucker out, bags are cheap.
3. Dont close the cupboards or drawers leave them open. If I wanted to see everything I wouldnt have put them on the wall in the first place. Close them.
4. Cleaning up spills, or resting a dirty cooking utensils on a clean dish towel. We have bounty for that. Now when I have to dry my hands ill get crap smeared all over my hands.
5. Errr, not replacing the dish towels. I wash my hands, look for a towel, not anywhere to be found. Have to walk all over the kitchen dripping water all over. Fuck be courteous!
6. Moving stuff and not telling you where its been moved to.

I could go on and on. I think she does this shit to see how high she can push my blood pressure.

Xdeano
 
My ex would pull the scissors out of the drawer to cut something open.
She'd cut it, leave the cutting and the scissors on the counter directly above the drawer, then close the drawer.

And that was just the tip of the iceberg.

She'd do all of the laundry on the same day and then have it in unsorted, wrinkled piles all over the couch and loveseat.
It would sit there for days.

She'd ask if I would help her do projects and then disappear during the work. She'd be found asleep in the bed.
She had the nerve to fuss about not being able to sleep at night.
Well, it's almost impossible to sleep at night when you take 4-5 hour "naps."

She would complain about me making noise while cleaning the kitchen while she was taking another marathon nap.

She was always too tired to cook, but never too tired to go out to dinner.

She would complain about not having enough money while spending>$1200 per month eating out.

(I'm working 60-80 hours per week)

That doesn't even compare to her credit card usage and then paying the minimum monthly amount and wondering why the fucking balance never got lower.

Had to have the fucking TV on to go to sleep. Meanwhile, I'm trying to rest up for the next day earning money for her to piss away.

She would bitch at me for falling asleep on the couch before bed time. Well, fuck, I suppose 0400 doesn't come all that early.

She would slam dressed drawers and the bathroom door if I was asleep.

She would leave fast food bags in the car. Napkins and straw covers would be just tossed wherever they would land.
There's a cockroach story to this that is just too fucking long to type out on this phone.

She never, ever put the vacuum away and left the cord strung out.

There is much, much more, but I'll end it with something that still makes me laugh.

Against my wishes, she bought my oldest daughter a rabbit. The rabbit cost $24 and my ex said she loved rabbits.
Well, that $24 rabbit cost me almost 1k in vet bills.
Anyhoo, the rabbit (Peanut) fucking hated my ex.
When my ex would walk through the living room, Peanut would attack her and chase her into the bedroom. I've never seen 9 and 12 yr old girls laugh at their mother as much as my girls did. It was a constant source of entertainment.
In fact, the ex started asking if Peanut was inside before she'd come out of the room. Well, as you might suspect, we didn't always tell the truth. ???
 
My ex would pull the scissors out of the drawer to cut something open.
She'd cut it, leave the cutting and the scissors on the counter directly above the drawer, then close the drawer.

And that was just the tip of the iceberg.

She'd do all of the laundry on the same day and then have it in unsorted, wrinkled piles all over the couch and loveseat.
It would sit there for days.

She'd ask if I would help her do projects and then disappear during the work. She'd be found asleep in the bed.
She had the nerve to fuss about not being able to sleep at night.
Well, it's almost impossible to sleep at night when you take 4-5 hour "naps."

She would complain about me making noise while cleaning the kitchen while she was taking another marathon nap.

She was always too tired to cook, but never too tired to go out to dinner.

She would complain about not having enough money while spending>$1200 per month eating out.

(I'm working 60-80 hours per week)

That doesn't even compare to her credit card usage and then paying the minimum monthly amount and wondering why the fucking balance never got lower.

Had to have the fucking TV on to go to sleep. Meanwhile, I'm trying to rest up for the next day earning money for her to piss away.

She would bitch at me for falling asleep on the couch before bed time. Well, fuck, I suppose 0400 doesn't come all that early.

She would slam dressed drawers and the bathroom door if I was asleep.

She would leave fast food bags in the car. Napkins and straw covers would be just tossed wherever they would land.
There's a cockroach story to this that is just too fucking long to type out on this phone.

She never, ever put the vacuum away and left the cord strung out.

There is much, much more, but I'll end it with something that still makes me laugh.

Against my wishes, she bought my oldest daughter a rabbit. The rabbit cost $24 and my ex said she loved rabbits.
Well, that $24 rabbit cost me almost 1k in vet bills.
Anyhoo, the rabbit (Peanut) fucking hated my ex.
When my ex would walk through the living room, Peanut would attack her and chase her into the bedroom. I've never seen 9 and 12 yr old girls laugh at their mother as much as my girls did. It was a constant source of entertainment.
In fact, the ex started asking if Peanut was inside before she'd come out of the room. Well, as you might suspect, we didn't always tell the truth. ???
Ex for a reason, lol
 
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After reading this whole thread I realize that mine is even more of a keeper than I gave her credit for! I really can't complain, she has been a Great Wife, Mother and Grandmother. She was a Redhead until Chemo caused it to fall out and it came back gray but somehow she missed out on that batshit crazy gene. She cooks, cleans, handles money well and is pretty laid back. For some reason She chose me and puts up with all of my shit!
 
I guess I cannot call my wife out in public if I wont confront her first. My wife has put up with more ignorant shit in 37 yrs than most ever would. So I bite my tongue.
My wife does love to learn how to do or fix shit, yet we do not work well as a team most often. I replace a faucet, or garbage disposal, right there, new storm door, right there. I have taught her to pull apart the drain trap under the disposal many times, yet yearly she forgets how to when 6lbs of carrot or potato peelings needed to be shoved into the disposal in one motion.
Our garage not only drains out the door, but also to both sides in the process. So we need ribbed mats. Her Toyota idles at 1500 upon startup, so the tires spin the mat when she puts it in gear. Also half way in, turns on the fucking thing for a correction. I replace yearly.
We have discussed both of these, so I am greenlighted. I have way bigger fish to fry than my wife's annoyances. One being the POS that should have said he sent his wife to confront corn pop, not him.
 
Alright boys what are some of the funny or not funny things your wife/gf does that pisses you off. Ill start with one that happens to me ALOT.View attachment 7263115

58aceeffc712e.image.jpg


One of the things is where to eat when we are traveling. I'll ask her where does she want to eat and she will name a bunch of places. I'm like, I'm familiar with the choices, where the f--k do you want to stop! I can go for long periods of time without eating, drinking or peeing so I try to be considerate and ask her.

I tell my wife to look for a place that she would like to stop, bus she continues to play on her phone. I just continue to drive.
 
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My Squaw worked for many years cooking in an elementary school.
She will sometimes speak to me as if I am in 2nd or 3rd grade and she is talking to a youngun.
Pisses me off to no end and I will turn to her and tell her, "I made it through 71 years of life and have been around the World more than twice, can you now talk to me as if I am not in 2nd. grade?"
That shuts her up and she is getting better about not doing that.

I understand her experience but she needs to understand mine also.
 
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Is this thread dedicated exclusively to women we’re currently married to or attached with?

In other words, do ex-wives count?

Oh heck. Never mind. The list would be too long.
 
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I was sorta joking in my first post here when I said my wife is better with a shotgun than me. That part is true, but it doesn't piss me off.

What does piss me off is she doesn't allow me or the kids in the kitchen to help out when she's cooking. I'm no Gordon Ramsay, but I do like to cook and I want my boys to be independent and learn cooking skills at a young age so they don't have to rely on a woman to cook for them later in life.
 
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Coffee mugs and lights.
We have a cabinet full of coffee mugs. She's the one that drinks coffee and keeps bringing more of them mugs home. Like lost kittens or something. I am up very early and I started making the coffee because I like the smell of it. Coffee, bacon, eggs and sausage are what a kitchen should smell like in the morning.
But I can't drink the stuff. And lights. She has figured out how to turn them on but she has yet to figure out how to turn them off. I often ask if she's scared of the dark.
I came home from a week of hunting and every light was on. I told her I could see the glow from the top of the mountain.
 
Only thing that really bothers me is when she does the laundry and doesnt fold and put it away. Then everyone lives out of laundry baskets until eventually the clean and dirty get all mixed up on the floor and she needs to rewash it all becuase nobody can tell if whats clean or not.

I wear a uniform and have laundry service for work so I contribute very little to the pile.
 
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Longshot, It doesn't make a fuck, give it your best shot exs or now.
Hopefully the girls are reading all of this shit and learning how to keep their Old Man happy.

Projection! The narcissistic bitch would accuse me of things that she was guilty of doing.

She accused me of cheating on her and I never did. Yet she would peddle her ass all over town, even after I confronted her on it.

She accused me of being paranoid when she had a list of phobias for a case study that would cause a Freudian to salivate like a bull dog with rabies.

She would deliberately do things just to irritate me. Worst of all, she would be the passive-aggressive type.

Gaslighting! Need I say more? The cunt would accuse me of having a faulty memory when I would remind her of something she said. I don't want to reveal what I do for a living but I do a damn good job of listening to people and have an excellent memory. Take my word for it.

The little cunt acted like she was a financial genius and I was stupid with money. That's because she didn't think I was spending enough on her. Yet, she went bankrupt after we were divorced.

The hypocritical bitch told me that I had to seek counseling because I was the one that was crazy. When I read the leviathan's journal it was she that was always questioning her sanity.

She said that I was such a rotten SOB and that's why I didn't have any friends. That's not true either. I have some really great friends who are like family. Yet she wondered, why in her journal, that she didn't have any friends. She couldn't understand why nobody liked her.

Ever heard of the term, "flying monkeys" when it comes to narcissists? Look it up because I don't feel like explaining it. Anyway, she hated my relatives. She talked about them in her journal and she could not stand them but when we were divorcing, she sucked up to them like a hoover vacuum cleaner. They thought she was a little angel and I was a turd ball.

That was an eye-opener for me. I found out what rotten little shits my relatives were when they rallied round the Godzilla with lipstick. I don't have anything to do with them now and have friends who I would trust with my life.

She liked to give more orders and expected more blind obedience than a WWII German Field Marshall. She's gained so much weight that if you shaved her head she'd look like Mussolini doing an impersonation of Jabba the Hutt.

The only difference between her an a Texas Diamond Back is the the snake usually has the courtesy of rattling before it strikes.
 
My lady likes to wait until I'm in the doorway of the bathroom to start up a conversation. Damn yo, can't you see I'm about to check snipershide and drop a dook? Save the conversation until after I'm done visiting Maggie's Bar and Grill or until 11pm tonight when I'm about to fall asleep like you did the last two nights.

That's all I got...she's wonderful.
 
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Is this thread dedicated exclusively to women we’re currently married to or attached with?

In other words, do ex-wives count?

Oh heck. Never mind. The list would be too long.
Sure go for exes too lol
“Oh exes too?”
Several people are typing...
?
 
After the age of 40 an average unmarried middle class man could afford to pay for a $1500 hooker (which is pretty great outside of the larger markets) once a week and after age 70 pay for a decent looking 40-year old foreign "aide" with lap dancing skills for the rest of his life.

Tell your grandkids.
 
Have a conversation about anything, trivial or earth shattering. actual dialog between both of us. Then a week or two later, get questioned about the same fuckin thing we discussed. It's like she wasn't even there for the first (or second) conversation. Of course, she gets a big kick out of the ensuing eye rolls on my part, and doesn't understand why I give her the "WTF" look.
 
Alright boys what are some of the funny or not funny things your wife/gf does that pisses you off. Ill start with one that happens to me ALOT.View attachment 7263115
Best solution for that, when she says "Where do you want to go for dinner" or "Where are we going," just say, "Guess!" Whatever she says is "Right again!
"I don't know how you do that".
The titty-baby silent treatment, when she's butt hurt.
There is a simple solution for that shit, too.
If she stops talking to you, go to the kitchen and ..... Tighten ever single cap and jar. All of them, hard as you can.
Then go back to the reloading room, or den.
 
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This thread is the leverage by which you will all give up your guns.

Someone from ATF will show up on your doorstep with all your posts printed out and say......

"Does she really need us to give her your comments or would you like to turn over your AR?"
 
I don’t think there is a perfect wife, but mine is pretty good after 40 years.
My gripe: if she would watch porn as much as she watched the fucking Hallmark channel I would be a porn star!! (y) :LOL:
 
This is just one incident of my wife doing something that REALLY pissed me off to the point I didn't speak to her all day. Don't remember if this was April Fools Day or just some random shit she did to troll me. Anyways, about 3 years or so ago my wife thought it would be cute and funny to take our sons to the salon and have their hair done in pompadours. Needless to say I was not a happy camper when I first laid eyes on that. :mad:
 
This is just one incident of my wife doing something that REALLY pissed me off to the point I didn't speak to her all day. Don't remember if this was April Fools Day or just some random shit she did to troll me. Anyways, about 3 years or so ago my wife thought it would be cute and funny to take our sons to the salon and have their hair done in pompadours. Needless to say I was not a happy camper when I first laid eyes on that. :mad:

That's almost as bad as the bitch in Texas trying to turn her son into a girl. True story.