Hey all, I thought I'd share a bit about how things are going for me as of late, hopefully it will be cathartic.
As some of you may know from previous postings, I moved out to CA back in Jan to be with my fiancee who dumped me a month later. Since then I've had difficulty finding work, I tried my hand at selling insurance, learned that I'm no salesman.
A few months ago my platoon SGT approached me about having me getting my commission so that I could be the PL for our upcoming deployment. Last week I went in for my pre commissioning physical and everything went well except for the EKG, according to it I have an additional electrical pathway on my heart that could cause arrythmia and palpatations. Because of this I have been put on a wait status for OCS, I've begun the process of getting a second opinion from a cardiologist.
My problem is I don't know if even if I get cleared medically if it will be in time to still go to OCS, I would still have BOLC afterwards to complete before mobilization. If I have this deformity, which is easy to fix, the Regs say I am unelligable to go to OCS for 2 years after getting it fixed, and I don't know if it would make me non deployable.
Additionally, I haven't been looking for work as I don't think anyone would hire me knowing that I'd be taking off within a month or two for pretty much 2 years straight provided I get cleared medically. Also, I've gone out on dates with a number of different women, some that were, and the current one is, really awsome. However, when the conversation turns to my military career and they ask about what is coming up, they tend to freak out over that chance of me being gone, not that I really blame them. Didn't help that my new Battalion Commander asked the current girl when we were going to start having kids at the company christmas party over the weekend lol.
So here I am, with a very very uncertain future, unable to look for work or have a chance at a serious relationship until I know if I will be able to go to OCS or not. Plus the not knowing if I will be able to deploy or not, the mere thought of having to sit on the sidelines and not be where I belong, leading my men, makes me sick to my stomach. Its all very depressing especially knowing that I have no real control over any of this. Add on that I'm just about broke, I have just enough money to pay the bills and keep a roof over my head until end of Feb. if I become even more frugal than I already am.
Getting back to my heart problem, I've never had any symptoms, I've taken and passed four PT tests this year, generally scoring right around 250, not great but not horrible.
This having to wait to see the cardiologists and learn the results is killing me, I know what my options are and pretty much what I'll do once the results are in. I figure if I can't go OCS or deploy then I'll request to go IRR while the unit is deployed and try to get hired by BW or some other PMC.
So there it all is, I'm ready to settle down and start a family but can't, want to become an officer and deploy but might not be able to, am pretty much broke, and it all hinges on the condition of my heart.
No need for anyone to reply really, just wanted to get it out there and off my chest. I know many others are worse off than me and that all of this is temporary, but that knowledge really doesn't lessen the feeling of suck.
As some of you may know from previous postings, I moved out to CA back in Jan to be with my fiancee who dumped me a month later. Since then I've had difficulty finding work, I tried my hand at selling insurance, learned that I'm no salesman.
A few months ago my platoon SGT approached me about having me getting my commission so that I could be the PL for our upcoming deployment. Last week I went in for my pre commissioning physical and everything went well except for the EKG, according to it I have an additional electrical pathway on my heart that could cause arrythmia and palpatations. Because of this I have been put on a wait status for OCS, I've begun the process of getting a second opinion from a cardiologist.
My problem is I don't know if even if I get cleared medically if it will be in time to still go to OCS, I would still have BOLC afterwards to complete before mobilization. If I have this deformity, which is easy to fix, the Regs say I am unelligable to go to OCS for 2 years after getting it fixed, and I don't know if it would make me non deployable.
Additionally, I haven't been looking for work as I don't think anyone would hire me knowing that I'd be taking off within a month or two for pretty much 2 years straight provided I get cleared medically. Also, I've gone out on dates with a number of different women, some that were, and the current one is, really awsome. However, when the conversation turns to my military career and they ask about what is coming up, they tend to freak out over that chance of me being gone, not that I really blame them. Didn't help that my new Battalion Commander asked the current girl when we were going to start having kids at the company christmas party over the weekend lol.
So here I am, with a very very uncertain future, unable to look for work or have a chance at a serious relationship until I know if I will be able to go to OCS or not. Plus the not knowing if I will be able to deploy or not, the mere thought of having to sit on the sidelines and not be where I belong, leading my men, makes me sick to my stomach. Its all very depressing especially knowing that I have no real control over any of this. Add on that I'm just about broke, I have just enough money to pay the bills and keep a roof over my head until end of Feb. if I become even more frugal than I already am.
Getting back to my heart problem, I've never had any symptoms, I've taken and passed four PT tests this year, generally scoring right around 250, not great but not horrible.
This having to wait to see the cardiologists and learn the results is killing me, I know what my options are and pretty much what I'll do once the results are in. I figure if I can't go OCS or deploy then I'll request to go IRR while the unit is deployed and try to get hired by BW or some other PMC.
So there it all is, I'm ready to settle down and start a family but can't, want to become an officer and deploy but might not be able to, am pretty much broke, and it all hinges on the condition of my heart.
No need for anyone to reply really, just wanted to get it out there and off my chest. I know many others are worse off than me and that all of this is temporary, but that knowledge really doesn't lessen the feeling of suck.
