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Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)

I used to mow in a tractor just like that, many moons ago. Do you make any money from your farm or is it just a place to get away for a bit?

I definitely want a place that can make some $$. Not necessarily a complete income replacement, but some nice side hustle cash.

It is just home now. We built a new house on it roughly 20 years ago. Small 3 bedrooms 3 full baths. It is just enough to shoot on without being too much. Really the only reason I want to stay there. The wife on the other hand, it is HER house, built with just what she wanted. She never wants to leave.

It is a little like a vac when you get home. A place for the brain to go into neutral.

That huge fallen tree, no one anywhere is going to "make" me clean it up. I want to do it, but I can do it at my very slow pace. I like that a great deal. Lived in town once, I am not a good fit there.
 
Yep!!

My 10 yr old does decent.

GF has a just turned 5 nephew.

His art is, well, just crappy scribbles.

He likes to shovel snow and rake the yard though.
Literally will do it without being asked.
Already an old man about lawn upkeep 🤣

We had an John Deer 316 riding mower, everything is on the "dash" of the mower. My boy wanted to mow. I gave him a quick lesson....amazing DFS did not show up....this is the throttle, push this forward to go forward push back to go back, flip this switch to mow. And he was on it like a mad man. Wanting to mow. The neighbors would call and comment on it. You know he is singing while he is mowing.....yup.

He was 6.
 
Two words
Richard Rawlings. Auctions have been going on for a very long time. Richard ass monkey Rawlings and the bullshit prices he put on TV and walking around with stacks of cash? Made everyone with a piece of shit in a field think that they have a gold mine.
I was at a house and the guy had a 50 Chevy truck in the garage. All original, motor blown, no paint left just rust, brakes seized and hadn't moved in 40 years. I made a decent offer and he said that he would ask his son. The next day he called me and said that he would take $15K for it. I told him to call Richard at Gas Monkey garage because he is the only retard that would pay that amount.

My last one was a 77 trans am with a "rebuilt motor"....oddly enough it did not run. Looking under it there is major rot, but anything is fixable. Inside the car seats are trash, and it looks like they put motor parts in the back seat, so that is gone as well. He wants 10k. Ahh no. Well what is your offer. I would insult you with an offer. No you wont what is your offer. It is going to be so low you will be offended. No I wont. Ok, 1500. No, this has a brand new engine. Ok start it up. Well it wont run now it just needs a new distributer. Really that is interesting that a new motor needs that part. That is all it needs. Ok tell you what have it running and call me back I will GREATLY adjust my price if it is running (not really but for the fun of this). Ok, my friend has a distributer out of a chevelle and we are going to put it in this weekend. Sounds good and I drove away wondering how they are going to get a chevy dizzy into a BOP engine.

I never did get a call back.....wonder why.
 
327195399_1003076160575507_501465479450391003_n.jpeg

Some of y'all of been playing with mom's hairdryer with immoral intentions and huffing her fingernail polish
 
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It is just home now. We built a new house on it roughly 20 years ago. Small 3 bedrooms 3 full baths. It is just enough to shoot on without being too much. Really the only reason I want to stay there. The wife on the other hand, it is HER house, built with just what she wanted. She never wants to leave.

It is a little like a vac when you get home. A place for the brain to go into neutral.

That huge fallen tree, no one anywhere is going to "make" me clean it up. I want to do it, but I can do it at my very slow pace. I like that a great deal. Lived in town once, I am not a good fit there.
This sounds awesome. My wife and stepdaughter used to ride horses so that will almost have to be a consideration to any place we get, which is fine. I definitely want some animals and some sort of range. And my wife can have the house decor all to herself, I want my shop and land
 
It was said, during the 1927 flood, you could ride in a boat from Monroe, Louisiana to the Mississippi River without ever touching dry ground. I have seen many an epic flood in my day. But the flood of 1927 was the worse than any I have ever seen.

The flood of 1973 ranked right up there, The Mississippi nearly undermined the Old River Control Structure. Had it been successful or the Corps had failed, the Mississippi would have formed a new channel and a new delta south of Morgan City. The Old Mississippi would have became a long, narrow saltwater inlet.

As I always say. ”Its not IF it will flood in Louisiana, its if it will NOT flood in Louisiana.” Build high, stay dry, my friends.

View attachment 8063828

Growing up, I had a next door neighbor that lived in Monroe at that time. He remembered that flood and was telling me the same thing, Monroe to Vicksburg in a boat.
 
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My last one was a 77 trans am with a "rebuilt motor"....oddly enough it did not run. Looking under it there is major rot, but anything is fixable. Inside the car seats are trash, and it looks like they put motor parts in the back seat, so that is gone as well. He wants 10k. Ahh no. Well what is your offer. I would insult you with an offer. No you wont what is your offer. It is going to be so low you will be offended. No I wont. Ok, 1500. No, this has a brand new engine. Ok start it up. Well it wont run now it just needs a new distributer. Really that is interesting that a new motor needs that part. That is all it needs. Ok tell you what have it running and call me back I will GREATLY adjust my price if it is running (not really but for the fun of this). Ok, my friend has a distributer out of a chevelle and we are going to put it in this weekend. Sounds good and I drove away wondering how they are going to get a chevy dizzy into a BOP engine.

I never did get a call back.....wonder why.
Last year I was leaving a job and a neighbor down the street had a square body Chevy truck in the yard with three foot weeds all around it. I drove past saying "we're going do something with it" and two houses later there's a 2nd gen Monte Carlo in the back yard with a yard sale sign in between the grill and hood. So I stopped and asked if was for sale? "Yes it is " Great! Does it run? "Just had it tuned up and I have the receipt". 130K original miles, original owner, window sticker, fully loaded with every option, power windows, six way power seats, power sun roof, remote trunk open, cruise control, delay wipers, rear window defroster in the package tray and few more. Open the trunk and no rust. Crawl under the car and solid rocker panels and floor pans. Only thing I can find is door bottoms rusted out from clogged weep holes. It starts right up and I start thinking that he's going to give me the Richard Rawlings price.
So what do you want for it? "$1600 and it is yours".
I drove it home.
PXL_20220516_161252198.jpg

A few dents here and there but I'll fix them and some other spots before I paint it.
 

I guess there is little want to understand the picture, I can also state that it´s sort of a complete fashion shoot/pic but the rifle starts at around 90 000 pounds, the coat is a hightech anorak, they are awsome for hunting, camping and so on,

the hearing protection are the sort that enhances your hearing and also protects it, from one of the bes companies that makes them, the dog is typical purebred hunting dog, tracking dog, it can be used to stalk deer by scent and tracks.

In so much, yes in the frame there are more high value objects that few can and or will find the need to afford, however I still se no real reason to bash a comany that started making rifle and shotguns abour four years prior to the signing of the US Constitution.

I would gladly accept an offer for the rifle, for the anorak, for the dog and hearing protection, the model, not so much, to expensive I guess in upkeep.
Not bashing the company.... I have several Purdey doubles.

Bashing what they are doing with the image. Their social media posts are nothing but fashion plates featuring nothing to do with the real users and history. This is moonbats at an ad agency turning turning South Audley St. into Gucci.

Then again... I guess that's the only reason anyone would order one any more. Not to shoot. Just to say... "look at me, I have one" on their Instagram feed. Right before they post a picture of themselves in Monaco...

Sirhr
 
An army buddy of mine got mugged on MLK Boulevard in Fayetteville N.C. We were at a bar a few blocks away and he didn't want to pay bar price for smokes. Decided to walk to a gas station on MLK. He was gone for a couple hours. Finally stumbled back right before closing without any shoes. They beat him senseless and took everything. Left him unconscious behind the store.
Fayettnam be like dat


That must be some good reefer 😶‍🌫️
 
Not bashing the company.... I have several Purdey doubles.

Bashing what they are doing with the image. Their social media posts are nothing but fashion plates featuring nothing to do with the real users and history. This is moonbats at an ad agency turning turning South Audley St. into Gucci.

Then again... I guess that's the only reason anyone would order one any more. Not to shoot. Just to say... "look at me, I have one" on their Instagram feed. Right before they post a picture of themselves in Monaco...

Sirhr
I’d love to see pics sometime. A London best side lock 20 or 28 bore is my grail gun. To be used chasing quail over a pointing dog.
 
Last year I was leaving a job and a neighbor down the street had a square body Chevy truck in the yard with three foot weeds all around it. I drove past saying "we're going do something with it" and two houses later there's a 2nd gen Monte Carlo in the back yard with a yard sale sign in between the grill and hood. So I stopped and asked if was for sale? "Yes it is " Great! Does it run? "Just had it tuned up and I have the receipt". 130K original miles, original owner, window sticker, fully loaded with every option, power windows, six way power seats, power sun roof, remote trunk open, cruise control, delay wipers, rear window defroster in the package tray and few more. Open the trunk and no rust. Crawl under the car and solid rocker panels and floor pans. Only thing I can find is door bottoms rusted out from clogged weep holes. It starts right up and I start thinking that he's going to give me the Richard Rawlings price.
So what do you want for it? "$1600 and it is yours".
I drove it home.
View attachment 8064250
A few dents here and there but I'll fix them and some other spots before I paint it.
They ride much better than the gen 1's.
 
Reminds me of dumb shit NCOs and Airmen...er, Airpersons, fuck off political correct woke bullshit.

Me: Hey Rank|Name I need you to do _____________
Them: What?
Me: Did I stutter, or did your ears flap?

I have a fantasy of reliving my life over as Drill Sergeant. My ideal punishment for the woke-panty-waisted-transgender-pussy would be really sadistic. My other veteran friends tell me that it would be extremely sadistic.

I would have everyone at attention in formation. Then my motivational speech would go something like this.

"Once again, PVT Dingleberry, you have embarrassed me and the United States Army. However, I cannot bear the thought of making you do another push up.

You strike me as a soldier who is very cerebral, problem solving, self-motivated and very introspective. You're a special soldier that needs a special type of care and nurturing.

So, PVT Dingleberry, I'm not going to punish you. I believe in the new Army. We need new ways of dealing with highly intelligent soldiers like you with special needs.

Most Drill Sergeants would stick a boot instead of a butt plug up your ass but I like to think that I'm more enlightened than that. The more time that I spend in the Army, the more compassion I feel for young recruits like yourself.

Why I almost feel like your father so much that I want to bang your mother over and over again, unless she looks like you.

But I digress. Please forgive me, PVT Dingleberry, for straying off the subject. I get emotional and overly concerned for the young men, like you, in my platoon.

So here is what I'm going to do for you. Instead of punishing you. I'm going to reward you.

I want you to go to the orderly room and tell them that I said to give you a three day pass. You need the time off and away from the pressures of military life to do some really deep soul searching.

You need to reevaluate your goals and priorities. You need to meditate, rest and reflect on your valuable contribution to your country, your fellow soldiers, your friends and your family back home.

During your three days off, please think of me and the rest of the platoon and how much we care about you. Please find inspiration from valued role models you have encountered on your journey to this post and the glorious Army that loves you.

Go anywhere your heart desires. Read a Bible or something inspirational. Get laid if you want. Spend the three days in wanton debauchery to get the frustration out of your system.

You might want to visit the girlfriends and sisters of your platoon mates to let them know how well they are doing while they are apart. Go have fun with them for the next three days.

The rest of the platoon and I will be on a bivouac. I also hear that it will rain this weekend.

When you come back, you will be a new man and the rest of the men will welcome you with open arms, love and fraternal affection.

Dismissed PVT Dingleberry."
 
A farmer drove to a neighbor's farmhouse and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door.

"Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer.

"No, they went to town."

"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"

"No, he went with Mom and Dad."

The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself.

"I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give Dad a message," said the young boy.

"Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant!!"

The boy thought for a moment.

"You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the boar, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard."
 
Just look in vintage... ;-)

View attachment 8064280

See, I could be a spokesmodel for Purdey!

Sirhr
Well first off. You'll probably have to keep your tongue in your mouth and then get rid of the ridiculous collar and whoever your friend in the orange shirt is. You should probably ditch him.
 
Not bashing the company.... I have several Purdey doubles.

Bashing what they are doing with the image. Their social media posts are nothing but fashion plates featuring nothing to do with the real users and history. This is moonbats at an ad agency turning turning South Audley St. into Gucci.

Then again... I guess that's the only reason anyone would order one any more. Not to shoot. Just to say... "look at me, I have one" on their Instagram feed. Right before they post a picture of themselves in Monaco...

Sirhr

alright, I did not read you right, and that is my, bad, i am sorry. Regarding there social media, ad policy and how they come of, yeahh you are right, a company, a product like that, they have so much more to draw from.
 
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I don't drink coffee, never had a taste for it.

Being an early bird at work my boss would come in and say, you need to start coffee in the morning. I have never made it before and don't drink it. It is easy.

The coffee was chewable.

What is this......coffee. How many scoops did you put in. I don't know. What do you mean you don't know. I did not count, quite a few. More then 3-4, oh yea, lots more. How many. However many it took. Took? Yea took to fill it up. You filled the filter. Yea.

I don't have to make coffee anymore.
 
I don't drink coffee, never had a taste for it.

Being an early bird at work my boss would come in and say, you need to start coffee in the morning. I have never made it before and don't drink it. It is easy.

The coffee was chewable.

What is this......coffee. How many scoops did you put in. I don't know. What do you mean you don't know. I did not count, quite a few. More then 3-4, oh yea, lots more. How many. However many it took. Took? Yea took to fill it up. You filled the filter. Yea.

I don't have to make coffee anymore.

Darrel?

This sounds like a story from RAF Woodbridge circa 1984
 
I don't drink coffee, never had a taste for it.

Being an early bird at work my boss would come in and say, you need to start coffee in the morning. I have never made it before and don't drink it. It is easy.

The coffee was chewable.

What is this......coffee. How many scoops did you put in. I don't know. What do you mean you don't know. I did not count, quite a few. More then 3-4, oh yea, lots more. How many. However many it took. Took? Yea took to fill it up. You filled the filter. Yea.

I don't have to make coffee anymore.
First day on Camp Pendleton they did the same thing to me. You have to make the coffee in the morning. They had a huge, like 40 cup coffee maker so I asked how to make it since I don't drink coffee. Just fill it up with water and coffee and push the button!! There was choking and gagging and finally someone dumped it and made another pot. I never had to make their coffee again.
 
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First day on Camp Pendleton they did the same thing to me. You have to make the coffee in the morning. They had a huge, like 40 cup coffee maker so I asked how to make it since I don't drink coffee. Just fill it up with water and coffee and push the button!! There was choking and gagging and finally someone dumped it and made another pot. I never had to make their coffee again.
I thought about using that same argument when it came to cleaning the latrine but decided that it probably wouldn't work. There would be no way that I could convince anyone that I didn't have bowel movements.
 
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Never mind the probably 50k$ rifle.


I guess there is little want to understand the picture, I can also state that it´s sort of a complete fashion shoot/pic but the rifle starts at around 90 000 pounds, the coat is a hightech anorak, they are awsome for hunting, camping and so on,

the hearing protection are the sort that enhances your hearing and also protects it, from one of the bes companies that makes them, the dog is typical purebred hunting dog, tracking dog, it can be used to stalk deer by scent and tracks.

In so much, yes in the frame there are more high value objects that few can and or will find the need to afford, however I still se no real reason to bash a comany that started making rifle and shotguns abour four years prior to the signing of the US Constitution.

I would gladly accept an offer for the rifle, for the anorak, for the dog and hearing protection, the model, not so much, to expensive I guess in upkeep.

Hunting with your bolt action open and earmuffs on is fucking ghey.