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Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)

A very old man lay dying in his bed. In death's doorway, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookie wafting up the stairs.

He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven.

There, spread out on newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table. The aged and withered hand, shaking, made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when he was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.

"Stay out of those," she said. "They're for the funeral!”
 
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You do know that seals do that when running from their natural predator the great white shark, right ?
Can't say I'd be sad if they all got eaten.....fucking skank water dogs suck.
They'll steal your bait, they'll half eat a fish you're pulling in, they will ruin a boat parked at the marina by eating the upholstery right out of it.
Yea, no love lost there....right ?
 
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Payment for putting your oil and gas leaking POS in their environment.
You do know that seals do that when running from their natural predator the great white shark, right ?
Can't say I'd be sad if they all got eaten.....fucking skank water dogs suck.
They'll steal your bait, they'll half eat a fish you're pulling in, they will ruin a boat parked at the marina by eating the upholstery right out of it.
Yea, no love lost there....right ?
 
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Reactions: UKDslayer
Probably won't be funny in the near future.


All the talk about eating bugs and liking it, owning nothing and being happy got me thinking. Those idiots that go on "Naked And Afraid" are sooo ahead right now
Ahead for what? They are also naked of Ka-Bars and AR-15's. The only thing they are 'ahead' on is that we won't have to strip their hemp-fiber clothes and LaCoste shirts off the carcasses before BBQ-ing.

Sirhr