Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)
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Alex- “You’ve uncovered an image clue…”
Beep beep beep…
Alex- “Rhonda.”
Rhonda- “How do you get shot by a road hunter in Montana? Alex?”
Alex- “That is correct. However, we would have accepted any of the mountain west states. Please select your next clue.”
This is a metaphor for how women think when they let their children be taught and counseled by trannies, queers and pedophiles. Let that sink in for a moment .
Senior Wedding Plan....
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Naples, are all excited about their decision to get married.
They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way they pass a drugstore.
Jacob suggests they go in, he addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you the owner?"
The pharmacist answers, "Yes."
Jacob: "We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"
Pharmacist: "Of course, we do."
Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"
Pharmacist: "All kinds."
Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism?"
Pharmacist: "Definitely."
Jacob: "How about suppositories?"
Pharmacist: "You bet!”
Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis and Alzheimer's?"
Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety. The Works."
Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?"
Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
Jacob: "Everything for heartburn and indigestion?"
Pharmacist: "We sure do."
Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers and canes?"
Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."
Jacob: "Adult diapers?"
Pharmacist: "Sure."
Jacob: "We'd like to use this store as our Bridal Registry.”
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Naples, are all excited about their decision to get married.
They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way they pass a drugstore.
Jacob suggests they go in, he addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you the owner?"
The pharmacist answers, "Yes."
Jacob: "We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"
Pharmacist: "Of course, we do."
Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"
Pharmacist: "All kinds."
Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism?"
Pharmacist: "Definitely."
Jacob: "How about suppositories?"
Pharmacist: "You bet!”
Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis and Alzheimer's?"
Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety. The Works."
Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?"
Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
Jacob: "Everything for heartburn and indigestion?"
Pharmacist: "We sure do."
Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers and canes?"
Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."
Jacob: "Adult diapers?"
Pharmacist: "Sure."
Jacob: "We'd like to use this store as our Bridal Registry.”
The term "Gentleman Farmer" summed up in one image.
Sirhr
Sirhr
At least We know what to send LL for Christmas!!
Tad surprised he took an ambulance.
I have seen darn near everything one can in an ER and Trauma OR.
Motocross riders are darn tough. .
And of course the run of the mill farmers and ranchers.
Asked one ole boy once “What brings you to the ER sir?”
“Bull was sick and I was tending to him and he was crosser than usual. Kicked me a couple times and pushed me against the gate”.
Me “when?”
“3 days ago. Just aint getting better, so thought I should get checked out. Oh, and I aint stopped pissin blood since it happened”.
8 busted ribs, collapsed lung, grade 4 liver lac, kidney lac, and some other stuff.
Most folks woulda passed out from pain. Or died waiting like that.
And he drove himself in to the hospital.
He was 84 or 86 at the time.
My great uncle was a mechanic/welder/machinist, used to pick metal shards out his own eyeballs with a needle and/or tweezers while looking in a handheld mirror.
When I was a teenager I got a metal shard stuck straight in my eyeball...working on something, can't remember what...probably trying fix some farm equipment so dad wouldn't find out I broke down. My mom was a nurse, but rather than taking me to the hospital she worked at to have our family Doc take care of it, she drove me over to Uncle Roy's place a couple miles away to have him fix me up. Having dirty hands (solid black with grease and soot) he came at my eyeball with a needle and a magnifying glass...got it out in a few seconds.
Why isn’t there any blood on the stick?
You can only understand this if you have a boxer.
I wuz a "motocross rider" way back when. For what little bit I was tough back then, I ain't that way any more......
A Gerstner machinist toolbox has a metal mirror in the flip up top for getting stuff out of your eyes. Or tidying up I suppose.
You mean there's another way?
How did the.blunt end of the stick go through sole, foot and the top of boot with a clean hole? No blood or tissue anywhere on stick? Nothing protruding from boot?
BS photo… either a hole saw or photoshop.
Sirhr
One of our buddies on Thumpertalk.com. His new riding name immediately became Groot. Amazingly he rode with it in his neck for 25 minutes to find help.
"We discussed our options and since there was no blood, I was conscious and not dizzy we were getting back on the bikes and headed down the mountain to the dirt rode to get cell service. We ended up at a farm house and they knew who to call. We waited for the ambulance for 20-25 minutes. It was another 45 minutes I. The ambulance to the ER.
When I woke up the stick was gone. It went in the left side of my neck down between my esophagus and spine then slightly piercing my right lung. 5” in. I could have easily hit my artery and bleed out there in my friends arms. He DEFINITELY didn’t need that again and I have a second chance. I was in The hospital for 24 hours. Finally! I got real good luck!!!"
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I've had 2 boxers, both excellent dogs, and that's an accurate description of the breed. Currently have a boxer/rat terrier mix that does something similar if I ignore her long enough. LOL
This person uses AI to insert Trump into historical moments and the results are spectacular
So this Twitter account called Trump History uses AI to insert Trump into important historical moments and the results are visually stunning, extremely realistic, and absurdly hilarious. Here are the best ones:
notthebee.com
Note no blood from the pic Mike Islander posted?
Luckiest dude ever.
Thats pretty awesome.
Tamponade, its a thing. Even of small vessels.
No idea with the motocross boot.
Seen a lot of FB stuck through boots and high speed and many look similar. Mostly construction and plenty from motorcycles and snowmobiles.
There is a chance it busted his foot, but didnt penetrate it and it is all shoved medially in the boot.
We use a dremel and shop vac for debris to cut those boots off.
Thats why you gotta have redneck ER nurses.
Chicks rarely know how to operate a Dremel.
Dude nurses in joggers (recently learned what these new fashion pants for dudes are called besides “homo britches”) never know.
Luckiest dude ever.
Thats pretty awesome.
Tamponade, its a thing. Even of small vessels.
No idea with the motocross boot.
Seen a lot of FB stuck through boots and high speed and many look similar. Mostly construction and plenty from motorcycles and snowmobiles.
There is a chance it busted his foot, but didnt penetrate it and it is all shoved medially in the boot.
We use a dremel and shop vac for debris to cut those boots off.
Thats why you gotta have redneck ER nurses.
Chicks rarely know how to operate a Dremel.
Dude nurses in joggers (recently learned what these new fashion pants for dudes are called besides “homo britches”) never know.
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