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Bear Pit Thread About Bears.

sirhrmechanic

Command Sgt. Major
Full Member
Minuteman
@EddieNFL pointed out quite correctly that The Bear Pit is severely lacking in information about bears.

So this thread is for posting facts about bears. Stories about bears. Pictures of bears and other bear-like subjects.
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In fact, bears can swim.

Sirhr
 
In my travels the past couple of years, when camping in areas I expected bears to be present, I‘ve run across big cats instead. There is nothing quite like having a mountain lion go half trotting through your campsite as you are cooking dinner. Sitting up all night on fire watch with thermals, and your head on a swivel is pretty much a waste of time when nobody else is sleeping either.
 
In my travels the past couple of years, when camping in areas I expected bears to be present, I‘ve run across big cats instead. There is nothing quite like having a mountain lion go half trotting through your campsite as you are cooking dinner. Sitting up all night on fire watch with thermals, and your head on a swivel is pretty much a waste of time when nobody else is sleeping either.


The BEST literary description addressing the sheer terror, anxiety, and gut wrenching paranoia of early man with very little effective weaponry facing a carnivorous giant cat stalking him and his fellow tribespeople can be found in the first chapter of Arthur C. Clarke's novel version of 2001: A Space Odyssey. A hominid named "Moon Watcher" and his tribe living in a small cave on the African savanna being hunted one by one by a leopard until one day the survivors decided to actually band together and do something about the nightly terror that is eviscerating their fellow cave dwellers on a clockwork basis.

It can also be assumed by very subtle hints given by the author that the ape man hominid Moon Watcher is in fact the direct ancestor of future US astronaut Dave Bowman, who was pulled through the Monolith to be transformed into a singularity by the Elder race. The Monolith's computers already knew Bowman long before the Discovery entered Saturn orbit and then found it's way to Iapetus, because it had already interacted with, and manipulated the mind of Moon Watcher 2 million years ago. It sought out Bowman to continue the experiment that it had started conducting with Moon Watcher.
 
"Well, once upon a time, there was this redneck who decided to go hunting. After a full day of hunting, he didn't kill anything to he decided to pack up and go home when all of a sudden, he sees a bear and decides to shoot it. He fires one shot, but misses. The bear comes up to him and says, "You just tried to kill me!" But the redneck says no my gun went off by itself, but the bear does not believe him and says, "Now I'm gonna fuck you in the ass."
After the bear is done with the redneck, the redneck says, " fuckin bear, I'm gonna kill you." and fires again..But he misses for a second time.

The bear comes up to him and says, " You just tried to kill me again!" And the redneck says "no, I dropped my gun and it went off again". The bear doesn't believe him and says, " I'm gonna make you suck my dick." So after the bear is done with him he leaves, and the redneck is real mad and fires a third time. But again he misses. So the bear comes up to him and says, " You didn't come here to hunt, did you?"


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A bear and a rabbit are pooping in the woods
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After the bear is done he turns to the rabbit and says "do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit looks confused and says "no, I've never had a problem with that"
The bear smiles and says "good" and picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass with the rabbit.
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Damn near saw that play out in Kings Canyon near Tharp's Log. Rounded the corner and was informed there was a Grizzly sitting in the medow. She was a BIG blonde (As in the grass was 4 ft tall and not coming to her shoulder sitting) and I was like COOL! Then I saw the cubs across the medow in a tree with some idiot tourists getting WAY to close to take pictures. I was postive there was going to be a mauling.
 
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Been charged twice. Once on the Seward peninsula and once outside crested butt. I don’t go out up north without being strapped, period. I’ll see if I can get the pictures of the Alaskan bear off my old MacBook

Kebler pass outside of Crested Butte is where I had my worst bear encounter.
 
Damn near saw that play out in Kings Canyon near Tharp's Log. Rounded the corner and was informed there was a Grizzly sitting in the medow. She was a BIG blonde (As in the grass 4 ft tall and not coming to her shoulder sitting) and I was like COOL! Then I saw the cubs across the medow in a tree with some idiot tourists getting WAY close to take pictures. I was postive there was going to be a mauling.

We rented a condo in Pagosa Springs. One morning there’s commotion outside, and there’s a bear cub up a tree right at the back patio of the place - and about 10 people at the base of the tree snapping photos with their phones. WTF? These people had zero common sense or any idea where “Momma Bear” was. Luckily a Police officer showed up and sent all the idiots away before they got mauled.
 
been practicing with my S&W 10mm for a Alaska fishing trip, hopefully I won't need it , but I ain't taking any chances
 

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Kebler pass outside of Crested Butte is where I had my worst bear encounter.
Not necessarily a bad encounter but have seen several bears every time I’ve been to Crested Butte.
 
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Sent some time backpacking in Alaska in 77 and 78 seen some bears each time , fortunately they didn't bother us , and we didn't bother them , all I had at the time was a colt trooper 357 , thank God I didn't have to use it . That might not have ended well for my 20yr old ass
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Got a bear tag this year. Saw 3 last year on my deer hunt, might turn into a bear hunt! Alright, ill sack up and try for both. Its surprising how many are in southern az in the desert!
 
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A rabbit and a bear were both squatting down, side by side, having a poop in the woods.The bear turns to the rabbit and says, “Do you ever get poop stuck in your fur?”. The rabbit replies, “Nope, not really”.So the bear grabs the rabbit and wipes his butt with it.
an old tale about a bear and a rabbit .
 
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"Excuse me....bear fucker!"
(you will have to sign in to see it.)
 


LOL ... Hungry Spring Bears .. my brother came back from spring bear hunt over in MT.
He said that they parked the truck in secluded spot and went out to glass some fire road and field . When they came back a Bear was in back of their truck. He ripped up cooler, threw, scattered everything, all gear out on the ground, mauled and threw out of the bed both Mt. bikes, .... And Ate/chewed-off one of the Bike Seats off the bike .
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They will ruin the most expensive racehorses in short range races.

One bound and they are at max speed. If you see it it'll blow your mind because it isn't something you see, ridiculously quick. That's 0-35mph or so in a few feet.

We're lucky they don't generally see us as food, we're lucky most big predators don't.

They are neat though, had 3 different bears out the back door one year, had them within 20 feet of me dozens of times, one got to 6.5ft. No cubs, one was a very big female, I think, balding on top of her head, huge neck even though it was summer, I saw her turn it on, it's truly unbelievable, luckily, she was likely chasing another bear off.
Went from looking like she was going to fall asleep sitting there to leaving her soul behind she took off so fast, in the blink of an eye. I was about 15ft away from her at the time.

Stopped putting food out that year but they were coming into simple dry grain... no intention of it being for bear on my part, just happened.
 
Not that it really matters-- but bears can outrun "most" horses at a short distance- but if you have ever seen a quarter horse go from 0 to 45 (or 50 on some claims) it's not getting "ruined" by a bear.... But a horse can't do it over the rough ground that a bear can. Until game cams became a bigger thing I had no idea how many bears we have around us. They do a good job of avoiding people- and usually when we surprise one he just wants to get away.