Figured I'd share this here...
The flatlander douch-nozzle window licking McMansion trash... are calling the police a dozen times a day complaining about bears. The bears are not doing anything. They are just... being seen.
One utterly stupid broad posted that "It's because people are running bear dogs... they are scaring the bears into our yards where they are seeking safety." Which is utter B.S. There aren't 10 bear dog owners in the whole state. And they damn sure aren't running them through this town. Did I mention blithering idiots? Well, I do below.
So here is what I posted on our little leftist Kaffe Klatch called Front Porch Forum.
For those idiots in town complaining about bears: 1. Bears are not a problem. The problem is douche bags who build McMansions where bears live. 2. You moved to Vermont. Vermont has bears. Lots of them. You are the invasive species, not them. If you can't live with bears, go back to your urban craphole 3. Do not call the police because you see a bear. It is just doing Bear stuff. There are no criminal code violations being committed by bears. Bears, by definition, cannot commit misdemeanors or felonies. They are just being bears 4. If you think hunters are the problem... see items 1 through 3. They are not. It's you. 5. If you want to take a picture of your kid with a bear, do not put jelly on your kid's face for a cute selfle. Or... do! It will thin your progeny out of the herd... Darwin style. 6. If you want to keep bears away, take a watermelon and fill it with vodka. Leave it where bear will find it. Bears hate vodka. They will leave you alone in future. 7. If you are stupid enough to believe number 6... you deserve to have a drunk bear running around your house. 8. Bears just want to be left alone... So do Vermonters. So shut your pie holes about bears you blithering idiots.
Naturally, the butthurt little leftist trust fund yoga mom's and man bun butt-pirates took it down and banned me. I used bad words. Like... Douche and Craphole. But so tired of the little skin piccolo virtuoso's and their urban idiocy.... I was due to be banned for life anyway.
My buddy and I are going to do the watermelon thing this weekend. If I can get a bear passed out here on the farm (I have a bunch of them), I am going to Gorilla-glue a MAGA hat on its head and make national news.
Cheers,
Sirhr
