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A plea for sanity

Ode To a Spell Checker

I have a spelling checker -
It came with my new pea sea.
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.

Eye ran this poem threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished in it's weigh,
My checker tolled me sew.

A checker is a bless sing,
It freeze yew lodes of thyme.
It helps me right awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when aye rime.
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should be proud.
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaws are knot aloud.

And now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know faults with in my cite,
Of nun eye am a wear.

Each frays come posed up on my screen,
Eye trussed to bee a joule.
The checker poured o'er every word,
To cheque sum spelling rule.

That's why aye brake in two averse
By righting wants too pleas.
Sow now ewe sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear for pea seas.
That.....that hurt my eyes
 
Holy crikey!!!!!

First off, I'm not normally a stickler for spelling and punctuation, but jesus christ folks, can you use some punctuation and ATTEMPT to spell shit correctly?

In this day and age of spell checker, I just don't get all the misspellings. Never mind the conscious streams of thought, that some type out with no punctuation. Fuck. Some of the worst culprits seem to think themselves to be quite intelligent and opinionated, and yet look like they have a 3rd grade education.

Do everyone a favor; Take some time to post and quit looking like a crayon eating, window licking neanderthal, that the other side wants to paint us as being. Some of these posts are just fucking painful to read. Lol! It fucking makes my head hurt and eyes bleed, trying to decipher some of the shit some people post.

Lol! /end rant! ???
Thanks for posting this. I've been on a number of forums and been flamed for being a grammar / spelling Nazi. Very few people appreciate correction as "help". When I do provide help, it's only intended for someone to learn, educate themselves, and to not appear unintelligent.....or too lazy to learn the language. Stop flaming people for helping and start learning.
 
Riiiiiggghhht.
Your gunna learn dem ol dogs new tricks?
Gud luk wit dat.
Thanks for posting this. I've been on a number of forums and been flamed for being a grammar / spelling Nazi. Very few people appreciate correction as "help". When I do provide help, it's only intended for someone to learn, educate themselves, and to not appear unintelligent.....or too lazy to learn the language. Stop flaming people for helping and start learning.
 
It's all fun and games until there's a report to be written. And then it's "Oh, Veer, did you want a donut with that coffee?"


I think I used "assiduously" in a conversation once. Had a buck sergeant working for me, dumb as a box of rocks. After a particularly stupid mistake, I told him, "You assiduously exude a sophophobic attitude. He looked confused and said, Well, I do my best."
 
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