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All about you

earthquake said:
You know what, Kemper? I like you
You're not like the other people here, in the Bear Pit.

Oh, don't go get me wrong, they're fine people, they're good Americans, but they're content to sit back, maybe watch a little Mork and Mindy on channel 57, maybe kick back a cool Coors 16-ouncer...
They're good, fine people, Kemper but they don't know what the queers are doing to the soil.

You know that Jonny Wurster kid, the kid that delivers papers in the neighborhood? He's a fine kid. Some of the neighbors say he smokes crack, but I don't believe it. Anyway, for his tenth birthday, all he wanted was a burrow owl. He kept bugging his old man; "Dad, get me a burrow owl! I'll never ask for anything else as long as I live!" So the guy breaks down and buys him a burrow owl.
Anyway, 10:30 the other night, I go out in my yard and there's the Wurster kid, looking up in the tree! I say "What are you looking for?" And he says "I'm looking for my burrow owl!"
And I say "Jumpin' Jesus on a pogo stick! Everybody knows the burrow owl lives in a hole in the ground! Why the hell do you think they call it a burrow owl, anyway!?"
Now Kemper, do you think a kid like that is going to know what the queers are doing to the soil?

I first became aware of all this about ten years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Bill Jr., died. You know that carnival comes into town every year? Well this year they came through with a ride called The Mixer. The man said "Keep your head and arms inside The Mixer at all times." But Bill Jr., he was a daredevil, just like his old man!
He was leaning out saying "Hey everybody, look at me! Look at me!" POW! He was decapitated! They found his head over by the snow cone concession!
A few days after that, I open up the mail And there's a pamphlet in there from Pueblo, Colorado, and it's addressed to Bill Jr., and it's entitled Do You Know What the Queers Are Doing to Our Soil?

Now Kemper, if you look at the soil around any large US city with a big underground homosexual population, des Moines Iowa, for example. Look at the soil around Des Moines, Kemper, you can't build on it, you can't grow anything in it, the government says it's due to poor farming, but I know what's really going on, Kemper! I know it's the queers! They're in it with the aliens! They're building landing strips for gay Martians, I swear to God!

You know what, Kemper? I like you
You're not like the other people, here in the Bear Pit.
Click to expand...
*Just smiles and backs away slowly

I do not wish to see your skin collection in your basement. Could you please stop PMing me?

1662255155599.jpeg
 
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Talk about a thread derail.
 
Rthur said:
My name is Rthur, my wife is a butterfly herder and I'm a stay at home astronaut.

R
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I remember when you and your wife were on House Hunters... Your budget was like 2.2 mil.

Did you end up buying that 9 br beachfront made entirety out of iPhones?

Mike
 
Something of note for me recently.

I just got back from my 40 year high school reunion (class of 1982.) Man, the place was full of old people.
 
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Ronws said:
Something of note for me recently.

I just got back from my 40 year high school reunion (class of 1982.) Man, the place was full of old people.
Click to expand...
Class of 82 here also, shot a 22 lr fun match with my son the day they had the reunion.
 
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Blue Sky Country said:
I am a STRAIGHT heterosexual male from Ruckersville Virginia who only want to find my boyfriend-free girl. But those dang dirty trolls keep leaking my shit all over the Internet and sending me pickles in the mail. I HATE PICKLES. I AM STRAIGHT! Get it through your dang ugly heads you trolls!







LOLOLOLOLOL
Click to expand...

This is exactly what a raging flaming homo who’s still unsure about his sexuality and still in the closet would say. And he would say it exactly like this as well
 
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Mum mum me droowltodd AAGGGHHHH SSsppllddd . Bill the Cat is my Spirit Animal .
Mum Mum Boom Boom MIC AKKK .
 
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The D said:
This is exactly what a raging flaming homo who’s still unsure about his sexuality and still in the closet would say. And he would say it exactly like this as well
Click to expand...


That is what he turned out to be too. He became trans in 2016 right after sending some quasi- death threats to Donald Trump after the election which weren't enough to get him investigated despite perhaps several hundred people all contacting the Secret Service at once. On July 30, 2021, he was arrested after a nightmare 20 minute leaked phone call was posted on Kiwifarms of him describing in graphic detail of how he repeatedly raped and sodomized his own 80 year old dementia afflicted mother in their Ruckersville home every three nights for the past 2-3 months. Very detailed descriptions and the fucker was proud of what he'd done, saying that even his own father had not been able to "hit her G-spot" like he did. His trial in the Virginia justice system is still pending because the mofo is so absolutely batshit insane and now calling himself Jesus Christ and goddess of 3 different dimensions and shit that his lawyers and the prosecution don't even know how to start.
 
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Kemper said:
An opportunity to share anything about you that may let people know you better. -

My name is Gary Kemper (Sr. ) . I live in Farmingtom Mo.
I am a self-employed painter , mostly new trim packages on residential construction and repaints on interiors of existing dwellings. Some light commercial.
Just finished recently the interior of a U.S. Congressman's headquarters here in town. I am 65 years old and have been painting since I was 15. I spent 3 years in the military being officially sworn in 4 days after my 17th birthday. With 30 days leave saved, I served the 3 years I volunteered for and was still 19 years old for a month after coming home.

My job as a businessman ,for as long as I can remember, is stress free. 42 years of collecting every penny ever owed me and not a single thing filed against me is a record I'm proud of. Of ,course I don't have to deal with the general public to the degree some might think. The last several years is basically ,bid the job , they say yes, and I go paint for 5 or 6 hours. If they are Democrat I will most likely not work for them. My generation of business acquaintances has been dwindling but I work with my son and he knows everybody through his social life. I never had the time or money in my earlier years to do what he does outside work.

I let my son do the driving at work and I sit in the passenger seat and scope out the scenery for places that I can pull some silver out of the ground if I take the time to do it. I also have an ebay hobby as well as an auction hobby that my son and I enjoy doing together. I am fortunate that everything blends together and I simplify my hobbies as well as my work by mentally dealing with the complexities so the execution stays simple, if that makes any sense. I don't have to work or practice my hobbies for an income.

My wife and I live in a smaller home here in town on about an acre of ground. We could move out by the golf course, but we don't golf. 😉 I'm somewhat of a cheapskate and I blame that on being poor in my earlier years. I was an ugly kid and nobody wanted to play with me . I get no respect, I'm telling you, no respect . Mom would take me to the park to play on the see-saw and I had to run from one end to the other. 😊
Click to expand...
You should run ideas like this post by your son before you go through with it.... Just a friendly recommendation.
 
My name is Bull Gear, I live in Hazzard County and I've been known to be your Huckleberry Dillinger.

This is all I have to say.
 
"I've got this badge, I've got this gun. And I've got the love of Jesus in my pretty, green eyes."

Name that movie.
 
Downtown said:
Click to expand...


A very thin, bald-headed, bespectacled young accountant meets St. Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter takes in the little geek with the size 12 neck inside the size 13 shirt for a moment.

Then he asks, "what have you done to enter into Heaven?"

With a lilt and a lisp in his effeminate voice the twiggy little man says, "I was driving my little Prius down a lovely country road one day while the flowers were in bloom..."

He pauses for a second and St. Peter askes him to continue.

"It was a beautiful day. I wanted to take some photos of the flora and fauna and collect some butterfly specimens for my collection. I did something a little daring that I wouldn't ordinarily do. I drove with the windows open."

"Mother was always admonishing me to keep the windows rolled up lest I catch a cold. Since mother wasn't around, I decided to live a little on the wild side."

St. Peter, was trying to keep his eyes open while listening to Twinkle Toe's tales of high adventure.

"My little adventure away from the mundane solemnity of accounting was broken with a horrifying sight of a dreadful gang of motorcycle riders. Mother always told me to remain aloof of those rascals. They can be rather impolite, you know."

"Yes, I know," St. Peter acknowledging him, "please go on."

"I slowed my wheeled conveyance down a bit to get a better look. Much to my surprise and shock, I saw a beautiful damsel being accosted by this barbaric horde of hairy ruffians!"

By this time, St. Peter was on the edge of his seat.

Clearing his throat, "Well you see sir, Mother had always cautioned me against physical altercations. She adjured me to seek a peaceful way out of confrontations by tact, diplomacy or simply running away as fast as I could."

"However, the sight of the poor wretched example of humanity screaming and begging for mercy from the merciless was too much for me to take and I stopped my new Prius."

"I pulled out my whistle and pepper spray... Mother gave me those self-defense tools should I ever be accosted by any dreadful bullies with hairy chests and big muscles."

"Anyway, I stepped out of the car full of courage and inner strength to help the young lady that was about to be violated. This must have got the boorish Cretans' attention as they, momentarily, ceased with their vile actions."

"Then what did you do?" St. Peter asked with amazement.

With his voice escalating to a soprano pitch the little man waived his arms in the air to demonstrate his excitement. "I blew my whistle as loud as I could! Mother always told me that a whistle will always frighten away wild beasts."

"I pointed my pepper spray at them and shouted; 'stop you beasts! Cease and desist with your improprieties! You ruffians must unhand that poor woman and leave here immediately!"

St. Peter was erect and alert by now. "That's fantastic and really brave of you. When did all of this take place?"

"About a minute ago."
 
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