> MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO
>
> Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for
> my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a
> woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
>
> What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little
> to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting
> the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up
> in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in
> an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs
> in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it
> works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one
> or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it
> works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
> practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food
> poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass
> and a car hit me.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
> laughing so hard.
>
> Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
>
> Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
> world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your
> retired friends...... it will be their laugh for the day!!!
>
> Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for
> my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a
> woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
>
> What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little
> to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting
> the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up
> in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in
> an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs
> in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it
> works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one
> or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it
> works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
> practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food
> poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass
> and a car hit me.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
> laughing so hard.
>
> Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
>
> Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
> world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your
> retired friends...... it will be their laugh for the day!!!
