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How do you get your new toys into the house without pissing her off?

Some of y'all should thing through your marriage decision....

My wife was not a gun or country or hunting person when she met me. I made it clear as we got serious, the shooting and hunting was not negotiable and if she had an issue with it this was a deal-breaker, it was part of who I am. No apologies. It's really surprising how much she has moved over the years. She now has 3 pistols and a UTAS 12ga. For my 40th, she got me a 458 SOCOM upper and a 44Mag SW 629 Classic. Frankly the only limit on my gun spending is my own fiduciary responsibility, she will enable whatever I want. She wants me happy, I want her happy, so that leads to spending in other areas.
 
In the second year of marriage I bought a mid 60's model car. The wife asked what was I going to do with it. I said "fix it " and then I packed her dining room set up and out to storage. I then set up an engine stand and a table. I commenced to building a transmission and a Chevy small block. A year later I put the engine and transmission into the car and let her have a place for her dining set again.
Pretty much since then..........
 
My system is based on “Happy wife, happy life/When Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”:

1.) Marry a woman of similar means
2.) Prenup that clearly defines her money vs my money vs our money
3.) Auto deposit my share of general expenses into joint account (turning it from my money into our money)
4.) Make appropriate contributions to my retirement account and our investment account
5.) Spend more of my money on gifts for her than I do on guns for me
6.) Spend less of my money on accessories and consumables than she spends of her money on clothes, shoes, and handbags
7.) Do anything gun-related she’s interested in (she likes pistols)
8.) Whenever she hints at evening plans she’s interested in, jump on making them happen
9.) Never leave for work without saying, “I love you, and you’re beautiful”, especially if she’s just gotten out of bed

I learned steps 1 & 2 aren’t that easy if you’re already married, and the steps that go before it in that case are VERY expensive.
See below...
 
I remind her that I could've been one of those husbands who spends all his time at a bar, work, the golf course, my mistress' apartment that we would have to pay for, the strip club, etc. All would cost more than the guns that can ALWAYS be sold IF we need the money. ;)

:unsure: Exact words i use to say to my ex-wife.......:LOL:
 
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I take the Johnny Cash approach and build them one piece at a time...action in my lunchbox, trigger in my pocket, stock straight to the smithy, etc. I can blag my way out of a piece of something every month or two by saying I got a great deal on bulk ammo, but the time a complete custom rifle was on the Amex bill, there were words. She doesn’t know what one rifle to the next so getting the Franken-caddy through the door generally isn’t a problem. Admittedly, it does take ages sometimes to get the rifle together, but generally quicker than ordering from (insert custom builder here).
 
I take the Johnny Cash approach and build them one piece at a time...action in my lunchbox, trigger in my pocket, stock straight to the smithy, etc. I can blag my way out of a piece of something every month or two by saying I got a great deal on bulk ammo, but the time a complete custom rifle was on the Amex bill, there were words. She doesn’t know what one rifle to the next so getting the Franken-caddy through the door generally isn’t a problem. Admittedly, it does take ages sometimes to get the rifle together, but generally quicker than ordering from (insert custom builder here).

LOL,I did that for years till she caught on...
 
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My wife and I get a weekly allowance, she spends her money as she sees fit, and I do the same........
 
I'm kinda' old and I've been married a looo....ng time by most standards. When we got married the deal was simple. She could do whatever she wanted in terms of money unless I said no. We agreed that our relationship was not a democracy as there were only two votes which of course would lead to many impasses. She is smart, tough and not prone to doing stupid shit. Consequently, there have been few conflicts. Through the years we have twice needed significant cash in which case I disposed of a significant number of firearms in both numbers and dollars.

I have no reason not to tell my wife about anything I buy or anything I sell. Sometimes she's interested and sometimes she's not. She always feigns interest because she knows it is important to me.

Through the years my principle interest was quality SXS shotguns. If I sold something she would ask why and I would offer a response. She'd say that was a nice gun, it was silly to sell it. One year she quizzed my bird hunting partner on what I used that could stand upgrading. He identified any number of items that would probably be discarded by a homeless person. Christmas was package after package of quality goods from a high quality purveyor. For years I have smiled every time I reached for one of those gifts. She also bought me what was, without qualification, the best bird dog I have ever been in the field with. He was an absolute bird killing machine for two or three months of the year and the perfect family dog for the rest of the time.

One more aside an I will quit boring you. Years ago, a SXS smith that I'd known for years called and he was liquidating a significant collection for the family of one of his clients. Most were 16s which he knew I loved. My wife accompanied myself and my hunting partner. I won't belabor this, my wife wanted a gun because it was Scottish. She asked me to buy it and I did. It was a "best" hammer gun from the late 19th C. and restored to best standards including being reproofed for contemporary loads. When sold it made more money than any single fire arm in the past.

Thank you LORD.
 
I gave up trying to hide purchases long ago, I am a lousy liar,so I don't. I make good money, bills are paid and a roof over our heads, besides gun purchases pale in comparison to my other hobby, motorcycles. That said I still get a cringe if a scope arrives from FedEx and she asks if it's going on an old rifle or a new one, yeah I got busted lying about that.
 
I side with those that say "the house payment is paid, there is food in the pantry, the kids have clothes, and there is gas in the cars. She buys her toys and I buy mine." She trusts that I'll make good decisions with the above in mind.

AR rifles are easy as they can come into the house piecemeal and never threaten the budget.

My wife pulls out cash from our account when she goes to the store. This goes into a fund she uses for whatever it is she buys. I do the same for gun/hunting stuff. If I can't buy it with the cash I've saved, I don't buy it.

I wanted a Kidd supergrade 22 so my kids and I could compete on a local 22 match. I told her what I wanted to buy and why, and where the money would come from. No problem...

I have joked that the warm dark environment in th gun safe is, apparently, a good breeding ground.
 
I side with those that say "the house payment is paid, there is food in the pantry, the kids have clothes, and there is gas in the cars. She buys her toys and I buy mine." She trusts that I'll make good decisions with the above in mind.

AR rifles are easy as they can come into the house piecemeal and never threaten the budget.

My wife pulls out cash from our account when she goes to the store. This goes into a fund she uses for whatever it is she buys. I do the same for gun/hunting stuff. If I can't buy it with the cash I've saved, I don't buy it.

I wanted a Kidd supergrade 22 so my kids and I could compete on a local 22 match. I told her what I wanted to buy and why, and where the money would come from. No problem...

I have joked that the warm dark environment in th gun safe is, apparently, a good breeding ground.
Thankfully, for the kids has never been a problem...even though she knows my son has more expensive tastes than I have! God bless the little focker.
 
Easy....My wife and I have separate checking accounts, a joint savings account, and specific bills each of us pay each month. Because of this there has never been a “did you need that” or “how much did you spend”. I just went nuts on a 300 blk build and found a random suppressor I didn’t need last month. Wife don’t care—we each have our own accounts to buy stuff we want/need.
 
I'll expand my view a little bit.

If you need to hide things like that from your partner..........it's a shitty relationship.

Too bad more men don't keep it real from the start. It's my way or the highway.

Fact is you are either a quality man or you are not. If you are then you know there is another one out there
waiting. If you are not, well you probably latched on to the first piece of ass that ever smiled in your direction and let
her get away with whatever she likes.



If she likes how I do things. Cool, she can stick around.

If she doesn't like it. Cool. She knows where the door is.



Most beautiful phrase ever for relationship guidance:

"Either she is part of the crew or part of the cargo. "

Crew sticks around. Cargo gets dropped the fuck off.


So just be a man and know your worth. And if your value sucks, do what you need to do to raise it.
 
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Front door ^^^

Best way I've found.


R
 
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I'll expand my view a little bit.

If you need to hide things like that from your partner..........it's a shitty relationship.

Too bad more men don't keep it real from the start. It's my way or the highway.

Fact is you are either a quality man or you are not. If you are then you know there is another one out there
waiting. If you are not, well you probably latched on to the first piece of ass that ever smiled in your direction and let
her get away with whatever she likes.



If she likes how I do things. Cool, she can stick around.

If she doesn't like it. Cool. She knows where the door is.



Most beautiful phrase ever for relationship guidance:

"Either she is part of the crew or part of the cargo. "

Crew sticks around. Cargo gets dropped the fuck off.


So just be a man and know your worth. And if your value sucks, do what you need to do to raise it.


i need to show this to a few..i mean all... of my guy friends. they did the opposite of this. and they have all made their bed, now they are laying in it. it's a shame to watch.
 
I've been married for 6 years, 5 kids, and we've never had a fight. I work, and she's a full-time mom. She says since I earn the money, so she has no problem with me doing whatever I want with it. I am super frugal (hence the username) and pretty minimalistic, so I really think hard about everything I purchase, and because of this my wife knows that everything I buy is going to be a worthwhile purchase.

We do a monthly budget together, and I ask for and appreciate her input, but she is fine with anything I want to do because she recognizes my biblical role as leader. I've got a great wife! She doesn't ask for much for herself, so when she does I almost always jump on getting it.
 
Separate finances. We are each free to buy what we want and have never had a fight about money.
 
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We already have a minivan. When that dies (which might be soon) we are going to upgrade to a shuttle bus! I want it painted muticam, but she objects!
 
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I've laundered a lot of stuff with 0% credit cards.
Oh that’s not mine, it’s Johns, I’m doing some work on it for him. Oh those, those are Johns, I’m working up a load for his new rifle. Man I wish John would quit sending all this crap out here, but you know how his wife is.
 
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Get her involved in the sport! Mine told me this weekend "When you get that other tractor sold off, we ARE buying me a comp gun."
This was in response to me buying another tractor that I don't necessarily need but will be an upgrade to the current one.

Been 14 years now and we have been honest with each other and discuss things....no need to sneak.
 
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in addition to the above, I gotta tell you guys I have never held a paycheck since getting married, 35 years she has collected all my money, except the investment portfolio, which is 15 - 25% of my income since my Army days, we are done with Kids, she sees the retirement account, she is happy and does not ever blink an eye if I go buy something, she asks that I notify her above 10k and if I use credit as she manages all that.She is Korean from southern Indiana, very good at managing household and money, I am good at investing and buying shit. Its a harmonious situation.
 
When I was on the All Guard shooting team I’d just always tell her the new guns were issued from the National Team. I had to tell my armoror to be careful checking them in if I died and the wife tried to send all the “govt issued” guns back to him! Lol
 
My reloading habits keep me home at night. My shooting habits keep me away from the bars during the day. Both make me look for stops at sporting goods stores on road trips. She's OK with that.