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Judy is a Dude

Alphatreedog

Tier Potato
Full Member
Minuteman
Supporter
  • Feb 15, 2017
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    11,888
    So I do my nightly search for ammo , target sports USA , Midway etc. . I wi d up on Cabelas knowing that hopeless disappointment is all that awaits me . So as I peruse their in store ammo Voila , the motherload . Federal Fusion 308 150grain amfuck8nbrosia . It is my AR 10 zero currently and my buddy has my bolt 308 whih loves it . I select 3 boxes then text said buddy who replies vet me 2 . All the way thru the transaction , place order and BLAM . 2 units out of inventory. Ok zo now what . No other buttons , icons or directions . WTF . Do I get three boxes . Did it go thru . Will Luke forgive Laura and run away with her to Tahiti ?
    No email notification or order confirmation . So fuck it I call Cabelas customer service .
    In a deep manly , barrel chesred tone , Hello this is Judy how can I help you . I respond with the cracking pubescent voice of Peter Brady , hi Judy how are you . At this point the needle did not just sreeech across the record . The wbole fukin turntable burst into a roaring inferno of homophobic disgust , shock and horror . With the only words capable of relaying said tragedy being Steve Carell crying "Mommy " . At this point fuck the ammo my brain has turned to mush and is on an endless loop of " WTF , Sweet Baby Jesus zave my sorry ass " . Aaagh I feel sick , violated and not unlike one of @Bender / Bender's pidgeons . Kill it . Kill it all with fire . Saweet Meteeyor O "D" "E" "A" "T" "H" please take us .
     
    Trying to read that like....
    332AB1A9-EAD5-46E5-B40C-1826A077291D.gif
     
    So I do my nightly search for ammo , target sports USA , Midway etc. . I wi d up on Cabelas knowing that hopeless disappointment is all that awaits me . So as I peruse their in store ammo Voila , the motherload . Federal Fusion 308 150grain amfuck8nbrosia . It is my AR 10 zero currently and my buddy has my bolt 308 whih loves it . I select 3 boxes then text said buddy who replies vet me 2 . All the way thru the transaction , place order and BLAM . 2 units out of inventory. Ok zo now what . No other buttons , icons or directions . WTF . Do I get three boxes . Did it go thru . Will Luke forgive Laura and run away with her to Tahiti ?
    No email notification or order confirmation . So fuck it I call Cabelas customer service .
    In a deep manly , barrel chesred tone , Hello this is Judy how can I help you . I respond with the cracking pubescent voice of Peter Brady , hi Judy how are you . At this point the needle did not just sreeech across the record . The wbole fukin turntable burst into a roaring inferno of homophobic disgust , shock and horror . With the only words capable of relaying said tragedy being Steve Carell crying "Mommy " . At this point fuck the ammo my brain has turned to mush and is on an endless loop of " WTF , Sweet Baby Jesus zave my sorry ass " . Aaagh I feel sick , violated and not unlike one of @Bender / Bender's pidgeons . Kill it . Kill it all with fire . Saweet Meteeyor O "D" "E" "A" "T" "H" please take us .
     

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    So I do my nightly search for ammo , target sports USA , Midway etc. . I wi d up on Cabelas knowing that hopeless disappointment is all that awaits me . So as I peruse their in store ammo Voila , the motherload . Federal Fusion 308 150grain amfuck8nbrosia . It is my AR 10 zero currently and my buddy has my bolt 308 whih loves it . I select 3 boxes then text said buddy who replies vet me 2 . All the way thru the transaction , place order and BLAM . 2 units out of inventory. Ok zo now what . No other buttons , icons or directions . WTF . Do I get three boxes . Did it go thru . Will Luke forgive Laura and run away with her to Tahiti ?
    No email notification or order confirmation . So fuck it I call Cabelas customer service .
    In a deep manly , barrel chesred tone , Hello this is Judy how can I help you . I respond with the cracking pubescent voice of Peter Brady , hi Judy how are you . At this point the needle did not just sreeech across the record . The wbole fukin turntable burst into a roaring inferno of homophobic disgust , shock and horror . With the only words capable of relaying said tragedy being Steve Carell crying "Mommy " . At this point fuck the ammo my brain has turned to mush and is on an endless loop of " WTF , Sweet Baby Jesus zave my sorry ass " . Aaagh I feel sick , violated and not unlike one of @Bender / Bender's pidgeons . Kill it . Kill it all with fire . Saweet Meteeyor O "D" "E" "A" "T" "H" please take us .

    Walk a way from the bottle.
     
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    So I do my nightly search for ammo , target sports USA , Midway etc. . I wi d up on Cabelas knowing that hopeless disappointment is all that awaits me . So as I peruse their in store ammo Voila , the motherload . Federal Fusion 308 150grain amfuck8nbrosia . It is my AR 10 zero currently and my buddy has my bolt 308 whih loves it . I select 3 boxes then text said buddy who replies vet me 2 . All the way thru the transaction , place order and BLAM . 2 units out of inventory. Ok zo now what . No other buttons , icons or directions . WTF . Do I get three boxes . Did it go thru . Will Luke forgive Laura and run away with her to Tahiti ?
    No email notification or order confirmation . So fuck it I call Cabelas customer service .
    In a deep manly , barrel chesred tone , Hello this is Judy how can I help you . I respond with the cracking pubescent voice of Peter Brady , hi Judy how are you . At this point the needle did not just sreeech across the record . The wbole fukin turntable burst into a roaring inferno of homophobic disgust , shock and horror . With the only words capable of relaying said tragedy being Steve Carell crying "Mommy " . At this point fuck the ammo my brain has turned to mush and is on an endless loop of " WTF , Sweet Baby Jesus zave my sorry ass " . Aaagh I feel sick , violated and not unlike one of @Bender / Bender's pidgeons . Kill it . Kill it all with fire . Saweet Meteeyor O "D" "E" "A" "T" "H" please take us .
    I found the secret to truly comprehending all of the above.
    16009089611461230491769246410733.jpg


    3 heavy-pour Old Fashioned's with Bulleit Rye in 2 hours is the key to unlocking the mysteries.
     
    So I do my nightly search for ammo , target sports USA , Midway etc. . I wi d up on Cabelas knowing that hopeless disappointment is all that awaits me . So as I peruse their in store ammo Voila , the motherload . Federal Fusion 308 150grain amfuck8nbrosia . It is my AR 10 zero currently and my buddy has my bolt 308 whih loves it . I select 3 boxes then text said buddy who replies vet me 2 . All the way thru the transaction , place order and BLAM . 2 units out of inventory. Ok zo now what . No other buttons , icons or directions . WTF . Do I get three boxes . Did it go thru . Will Luke forgive Laura and run away with her to Tahiti ?
    No email notification or order confirmation . So fuck it I call Cabelas customer service .
    In a deep manly , barrel chesred tone , Hello this is Judy how can I help you . I respond with the cracking pubescent voice of Peter Brady , hi Judy how are you . At this point the needle did not just sreeech across the record . The wbole fukin turntable burst into a roaring inferno of homophobic disgust , shock and horror . With the only words capable of relaying said tragedy being Steve Carell crying "Mommy " . At this point fuck the ammo my brain has turned to mush and is on an endless loop of " WTF , Sweet Baby Jesus zave my sorry ass " . Aaagh I feel sick , violated and not unlike one of @Bender / Bender's pidgeons . Kill it . Kill it all with fire . Saweet Meteeyor O "D" "E" "A" "T" "H" please take us .

    I understood every word. And I feel you bro.

    Lots of passable trannys in my neck of the woods. The covid mask thing is really messing me up. The jaw line/mouth area is the easiest way pick them out when you know what you're looking at and I can't tell what's what when I see them from the front anymore. I have to pivot 90 degrees to see them from the side to check for an adams apple. I have a habit of making that pivot obvious and it's uncomfortable for everyone.

    Scary times.
     
    I understood every word. And I feel you bro.

    Lots of passable trannys in my neck of the woods. The covid mask thing is really messing me up. The jaw line/mouth area is the easiest way pick them out when you know what you're looking at and I can't tell what's what when I see them from the front anymore. I have to pivot 90 degrees to see them from the side to check for an adams apple. I have a habit of making that pivot obvious and it's uncomfortable for everyone.

    Scary times.
    Better master the Dundee handshake:

     
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