Maggie’s Motivational Pic Thread v2.0 - - New Rules - See Post #1
- Thread starter Snake-Eyes
- Start date
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- motivational pictures
In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, combined with an abundance of green, yellow and red vegetables. He did this so that Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Dairy Whip and Ice Cream. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?" And Man said "Yes!" And Woman said: "I'll have one too... with sprinkles". And lo and behold, they gained 10 pounds.
And so God created the healthful yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 12 to size 14.
So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad". And Satan presented crumbled Blue Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them". And Satan brought forth deep-fried squid rings, butter-dipped lobster chunks, and fried chicken so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol sharply increased.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man packed on more pounds.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy lycra jogging suits.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with that?" And Man replied: "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said "It is good". And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed... and created quadruple by-pass surgery. Satan chuckled and created the public health system.
Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Dairy Whip and Ice Cream. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?" And Man said "Yes!" And Woman said: "I'll have one too... with sprinkles". And lo and behold, they gained 10 pounds.
And so God created the healthful yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 12 to size 14.
So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad". And Satan presented crumbled Blue Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them". And Satan brought forth deep-fried squid rings, butter-dipped lobster chunks, and fried chicken so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol sharply increased.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man packed on more pounds.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy lycra jogging suits.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with that?" And Man replied: "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said "It is good". And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed... and created quadruple by-pass surgery. Satan chuckled and created the public health system.
Going to try this on the wifes car.....
That could have turned out far worse for him. That bill from the city is gonna be bad enough.
shit you not
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Are you lifting this material from somewhere else ? You have come up with some funny ass shit lately. I think I saw where you were nominated for funniest post of the year, earlier this week. What, you’re trying to pound the last nail in the coffins of all your competitors ?
Me ? You’re killin’ me. I’m dying of laughter, twice this week.
Oh, BTW, I’m working on a zinger in response to your post about my lack of time/space/time zone awareness, but I have a naked wife that requires my immediate presence/attention. You ? You’re just going to have to wait.......
Dusty
sorry, it is a diorama
"The injured soldier in that now iconic photo, roaring as he fires at unseen Waffen-SS fighters, is referred to only as The Screaming Major. The Major has no single real-world counterpart, but his frozen mask of rage is used to great Kuleshov effect in town battles. The rescuer in the photo is the alter ego of Mark’s younger brother Mike, who divides his time between a 1:1 scale life in Florida and a 1:6 scale life as a bodyguard for Mark’s alter ego, Hogie"
Why would I want to know ?
I think a .243W would answer the the question in an adequate fashion......
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Don’t lie you laughed your ass offSik
Fuk
U should be ashamed......
In honor of women's day, McDonalds turned the golden arches upside down to resemble a set of tits.
That is one naaaasty swamp if no oxidation occurred in the last 75 years.
This was making the rounds in all the heli pilot groups on FB yesterday. A pretty expensive little lapse in judgement there!
The NTSB report stated the pilot in the landing aircraft didn't have a clear view of the heli on the ground due to water on her windshield! The pilot of the heli on the ground positioned his aircraft outside the marked position due to water runoff, and he failed to have his radio on. No UNICOM frequency had been established either. In otherwords, poor/no comms and lack of good judgement lead to a huge series of screwups that cost the department a few million. Thankfully no one was serious injured! No word on whether any of the pilots are still flying...!
I may have identified the problem.
You sure it ain't caramel? It was delicious to me.
