• Winner! Quick Shot Challenge: What’s the dumbest shooting myth you’ve heard?

    View thread

Maggie’s MURPHY’S OTHER 15 LAWS

shooter65

General
Banned !
Minuteman
  • Jun 19, 2004
    7,234
    49,927
    60
    Indiana
    MURPHY’S OTHER 15 LAWS



    1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

    2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well..

    3. He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.

    4. A day without sunshine is like, well . Night.

    5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

    6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t..

    7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

    8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.

    9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

    10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

    11. The things that come to those that wait, may be the things left by those, who got there first.

    12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day in the hot sun trying to catch one.

    13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

    14 . The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in the dark.

    15.. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
     
    Re: MURPHY’S OTHER 15 LAWS

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: shooter65</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
    10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

    12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day in the hot sun trying to catch one.
    </div></div>

    #10 But if a left shoe fits, then getting another just like it does me no go. Who wears 2 left shoes except for those who can't dance?

    #12 Can't argue with that at all.
     
    Re: MURPHY’S OTHER 15 LAWS

    18 UNNATURAL LAWS
    ===================

    Have you ever received a phone call the minute you stepped outside your door? Has the bus you were waiting for ever appeared from behind a parked truck the instant you light up a cigarette? Certain astute individuals have noticed that such events are not the exception but, rather, the rule. Men like Murphy, Peter and Parkinson have made it their life work to ferret out the operating principles - the laws that govern the frustrating lives that we mortals live. Here is a small sampling of these laws.

    MURPHY'S LAW
    -------------
    If anything can go wrong, it will.

    O'TOOL'S COMMENTARY ON MURPHY'S LAW
    ------------------------------------
    Murphy was an optimist.

    THE UNSPEAKABLE LAW
    --------------------
    As soon as you mention something ....
    ... if it's good, it goes away
    ... if it's bad, it happens.

    NONRECIPROCAL LAWS OF EXPECTATIONS
    -----------------------------------
    Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.

    HOWE'S LAW
    -----------
    Every man has a scheme that will not work.

    ZYMURGY'S FIRST LAW OF EVOLVING SYSTEMS DYNAMICS
    -------------------------------------------------
    Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.

    ETORRE'S OBSERVATION
    ---------------------
    The other line moves faster.

    SKINNER'S CONSTANT (FLANAGAN'S FINAGLING FACTOR)
    -------------------------------------------------
    That quantity which, when multiplied by, divided by, added to, or subtracted from the answer you get, gives you the answer you should have got.

    MURPHY'S LAW OF SELECTIVE GRAVITY
    ----------------------------------
    An object will fall so as to do the most damage.

    JENNING'S COROLLARY TO MURPHY'S LAW OF SELECTIVE GRAVITY
    ---------------------------------------------------------
    The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

    GORDON'S FIRST LAW
    -------------------
    If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.

    MAIER'S LAW
    ------------
    If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.

    HOARE'S LAW OF LARGE PROBLEMS
    ------------------------------
    Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.

    BOREN'S FIRST LAW
    ------------------
    When in doubt, mumble.

    THE GOLDEN RULE OF ARTS AND SCIENCES
    -------------------------------------
    Whoever has the gold makes the rules.

    BARTH'S DISTINCTION
    --------------------
    There are two types of people: those who divide people into two types, and those who don't

    SEGAL'S LAW
    ------------
    A man with one watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure.

    THE NINETY-NINETY RULE OF PROJECT SCHEDULES
    --------------------------------------------
    The first 90 % of the task takes 90 % of the time, and the last 10 % takes the other 90 %

    FARBER'S FOURTH LAW
    --------------------
    Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.