Ring Ring Ring

TheGerman

Oberleutnant
PX Member
Minuteman
  • Jan 25, 2010
    8,610
    20,728
    the Westside
    Phone rings, I just pick it up without even looking at the number.

    Me: Yeah?

    This is an important call from the Social Security Administration. You are receiving this call because your social security benefits are being suspended due to illegal behavior. To talk to someone about this, please press 1.

    Presses 1.

    Hadj: Hello. This is the department of social security card. What are you calling about?

    Me: Department of social security card, huh?

    Hadj: Yes.

    Me: I just got a call that something is wrong with my social security card. So Im glad the department of social security card called me about my card, since i have a social security card and would hate for there to be a problem with my card so it seems like the department of social security card can help me fix whatever is going on with my social security card, right?

    Hadj: What is the last 4 of your social security so I can look up your file?

    Me: 6668

    Hadj: Six six six A? Like the letter A?

    Me: Yeah, sure, the letter A.

    Hadj: (makes clicking noises on his keyboard) Oh yes, I have your file right here. It says there is a problem with your social security card and it has been deactivated due to bad behavior.

    Me: Bad behavior? What? Did my wife call you?

    Hadj: Yes. Bad behavior. If you do not fix this very soon, you will lose all of your social security moneys.

    Me: Oh, wait, did the government do this?

    Hadj: Yes

    Me: Ok. Well, phew. I think I know what it is then.

    Hadj: What your bad behavior is?

    Me: Yeah. I figured theyd do this. See, they probably froze my social security card because of the murder trial.

    Hadj: murder trial?

    Me: Well, yes, 3 actually. See they didn't consolidate them so its a trial, but theres 3. I killed, err sorry, ALLEGEDLY killed 3 people. You know how that goes.

    Hadj: What do you think this did with your social security card that we need to help you fix?

    Me: I'm not sure. The last 3 guys that asked me that, I killed....ALLEGEDLY killed, when I found them over their VOIP internet phone numbers and killed them. Or thats what they said I did anyways. That's how I got into this mess in the first place. But Im glad you called so we can fix this!

    Me: Hey I just realized, is this a VOIP number youre calling me from?

    Hadj hangs up.
     

    Maggot

    Better to die on your feet than live on your knees
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Jul 27, 2007
    14,354
    11,342
    Virginia
    Phone rings, I just pick it up without even looking at the number.

    Me: Yeah?

    This is an important call from the Social Security Administration. You are receiving this call because your social security benefits are being suspended due to illegal behavior. To talk to someone about this, please press 1.

    Presses 1.

    Hadj: Hello. This is the department of social security card. What are you calling about?

    Me: Department of social security card, huh?

    Hadj: Yes.

    Me: I just got a call that something is wrong with my social security card. So Im glad the department of social security card called me about my card, since i have a social security card and would hate for there to be a problem with my card so it seems like the department of social security card can help me fix whatever is going on with my social security card, right?

    Hadj: What is the last 4 of your social security so I can look up your file?

    Me: 6668

    Hadj: Six six six A? Like the letter A?

    Me: Yeah, sure, the letter A.

    Hadj: (makes clicking noises on his keyboard) Oh yes, I have your file right here. It says there is a problem with your social security card and it has been deactivated due to bad behavior.

    Me: Bad behavior? What? Did my wife call you?

    Hadj: Yes. Bad behavior. If you do not fix this very soon, you will lose all of your social security moneys.

    Me: Oh, wait, did the government do this?

    Hadj: Yes

    Me: Ok. Well, phew. I think I know what it is then.

    Hadj: What your bad behavior is?

    Me: Yeah. I figured theyd do this. See, they probably froze my social security card because of the murder trial.

    Hadj: murder trial?

    Me: Well, yes, 3 actually. See they didn't consolidate them so its a trial, but theres 3. I killed, err sorry, ALLEGEDLY killed 3 people. You know how that goes.

    Hadj: What do you think this did with your social security card that we need to help you fix?

    Me: I'm not sure. The last 3 guys that asked me that, I killed....ALLEGEDLY killed, when I found them over their VOIP internet phone numbers and killed them. Or thats what they said I did anyways. That's how I got into this mess in the first place. But Im glad you called so we can fix this!

    Me: Hey I just realized, is this a VOIP number youre calling me from?

    Hadj hangs up.
    Im so stealing that.
     
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    HeavyAssault

    Dog-Face One-Horse Pony-Soldier (AVN RGT)
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Feb 14, 2011
    1,333
    2,340
    Alabama/Georgia
    main-qimg-9e092353491d022e6e8228fbc8e4ad87
     

    Not a Sniper

    Once more unto the breach...
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Phone rings, I just pick it up without even looking at the number.

    Me: Yeah?

    This is an important call from the Social Security Administration. You are receiving this call because your social security benefits are being suspended due to illegal behavior. To talk to someone about this, please press 1.

    Presses 1.

    Hadj: Hello. This is the department of social security card. What are you calling about?

    Me: Department of social security card, huh?

    Hadj: Yes.

    Me: I just got a call that something is wrong with my social security card. So Im glad the department of social security card called me about my card, since i have a social security card and would hate for there to be a problem with my card so it seems like the department of social security card can help me fix whatever is going on with my social security card, right?

    Hadj: What is the last 4 of your social security so I can look up your file?

    Me: 6668

    Hadj: Six six six A? Like the letter A?

    Me: Yeah, sure, the letter A.

    Hadj: (makes clicking noises on his keyboard) Oh yes, I have your file right here. It says there is a problem with your social security card and it has been deactivated due to bad behavior.

    Me: Bad behavior? What? Did my wife call you?

    Hadj: Yes. Bad behavior. If you do not fix this very soon, you will lose all of your social security moneys.

    Me: Oh, wait, did the government do this?

    Hadj: Yes

    Me: Ok. Well, phew. I think I know what it is then.

    Hadj: What your bad behavior is?

    Me: Yeah. I figured theyd do this. See, they probably froze my social security card because of the murder trial.

    Hadj: murder trial?

    Me: Well, yes, 3 actually. See they didn't consolidate them so its a trial, but theres 3. I killed, err sorry, ALLEGEDLY killed 3 people. You know how that goes.

    Hadj: What do you think this did with your social security card that we need to help you fix?

    Me: I'm not sure. The last 3 guys that asked me that, I killed....ALLEGEDLY killed, when I found them over their VOIP internet phone numbers and killed them. Or thats what they said I did anyways. That's how I got into this mess in the first place. But Im glad you called so we can fix this!

    Me: Hey I just realized, is this a VOIP number youre calling me from?

    Hadj hangs up.
    You rock dude-never lose that shit! :ROFLMAO:

    Hysterical!
     
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    DIBBS

    Old Mountain Man-Tired occasionally Grumpy SOB
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Aug 21, 2008
    1,855
    964
    WARSHington State
    I have found that a loud whistle, while not near the entertainment value (very well said BTW), will result in the offending party hangin up immediately.

    I like your approach mo bettah though! Guess I'm lazy...

    Thanks for the hearty belly laugh!
     
    Last edited:
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    candyx

    Private
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Apr 6, 2014
    3,887
    7,138
    When I call you tomorrow I'll ask for the first three numbers then the next day the middle two numbers. That way it doesn't seem suspicious :unsure:
     

    MCHOG

    Sergeant of the Hide
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Dec 6, 2018
    477
    749
    Atlanta, Georgia
    There are some Youtube videos of guys that let "Microsoft" scammers connect to their computers. While they are stringing the scammers along, they actually hack into the scammers' computers and delete files. Pretty entertaining stuff.

    The best I've herd is guys that almost got a scammer killed by sending him to Chad near Darfur. https://www.thisamericanlife.org/363/enforcers/act-one
     

    Strykervet

    Lanolin Lube 4U
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Jun 5, 2011
    5,922
    4,645
    45
    Pierce County, WA
    I just got one recently for Medicare.

    Are you so and so?

    Yep.

    I'm blah blah super fucking fast, what's your SSN?

    Who are you?

    I'm blah blah super fucking fast, what's your B'day?

    Who? Wait, I'm asking... Click.

    I never got to have any fun.

    I did report 'em to IG though because I can see some old folks falling for this easily.

    There are some Youtube videos of guys that let "Microsoft" scammers connect to their computers. While they are stringing the scammers along, they actually hack into the scammers' computers and delete files. Pretty entertaining stuff.

    The best I've herd is guys that almost got a scammer killed by sending him to Chad near Darfur. https://www.thisamericanlife.org/363/enforcers/act-one
    Didn't get one killed but I shut down an entire Nigerian operation with the help of (believe it or no, my arch nemesis fedex) once and they threatened me over the outcome. Apparently tens of thousands of dollars got frozen during that fiasco. They got greedy though and I kept pressing 'em for real info. Took a few weeks but I got it.
     

    6.5SH

    Major Hide Member
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Jul 24, 2020
    1,204
    1,528
    I just got one recently for Medicare.

    Are you so and so?

    Yep.

    I'm blah blah super fucking fast, what's your SSN?

    Who are you?

    I'm blah blah super fucking fast, what's your B'day?

    Who? Wait, I'm asking... Click.

    I never got to have any fun.

    I did report 'em to IG though because I can see some old folks falling for this easily.


    Didn't get one killed but I shut down an entire Nigerian operation with the help of (believe it or no, my arch nemesis fedex) once and they threatened me over the outcome. Apparently tens of thousands of dollars got frozen during that fiasco. They got greedy though and I kept pressing 'em for real info. Took a few weeks but I got it.
    Good job and nice ability to exploit their greed.
     

    Desert Raven

    Where wolf’s ears are, wolf’s teeth are near.
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Sep 26, 2018
    270
    649
    55
    The Sonoran Desert 11S11E
    @TheGerman NEVER disappoints. One eternal truth you learn on this board is that. Oh and for the love of Christ, never dress in a ridiculous fobbit-ass ghillie suit and have him give you a synopsis of your "gear".
     

    Huskydriver

    You gotta want it....
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Apr 17, 2018
    4,318
    6,749
    SLC, Utah
    Phone rings, I just pick it up without even looking at the number.

    Me: Yeah?

    This is an important call from the Social Security Administration. You are receiving this call because your social security benefits are being suspended due to illegal behavior. To talk to someone about this, please press 1.

    Presses 1.

    Hadj: Hello. This is the department of social security card. What are you calling about?

    Me: Department of social security card, huh?

    Hadj: Yes.

    Me: I just got a call that something is wrong with my social security card. So Im glad the department of social security card called me about my card, since i have a social security card and would hate for there to be a problem with my card so it seems like the department of social security card can help me fix whatever is going on with my social security card, right?

    Hadj: What is the last 4 of your social security so I can look up your file?

    Me: 6668

    Hadj: Six six six A? Like the letter A?

    Me: Yeah, sure, the letter A.

    Hadj: (makes clicking noises on his keyboard) Oh yes, I have your file right here. It says there is a problem with your social security card and it has been deactivated due to bad behavior.

    Me: Bad behavior? What? Did my wife call you?

    Hadj: Yes. Bad behavior. If you do not fix this very soon, you will lose all of your social security moneys.

    Me: Oh, wait, did the government do this?

    Hadj: Yes

    Me: Ok. Well, phew. I think I know what it is then.

    Hadj: What your bad behavior is?

    Me: Yeah. I figured theyd do this. See, they probably froze my social security card because of the murder trial.

    Hadj: murder trial?

    Me: Well, yes, 3 actually. See they didn't consolidate them so its a trial, but theres 3. I killed, err sorry, ALLEGEDLY killed 3 people. You know how that goes.

    Hadj: What do you think this did with your social security card that we need to help you fix?

    Me: I'm not sure. The last 3 guys that asked me that, I killed....ALLEGEDLY killed, when I found them over their VOIP internet phone numbers and killed them. Or thats what they said I did anyways. That's how I got into this mess in the first place. But Im glad you called so we can fix this!

    Me: Hey I just realized, is this a VOIP number youre calling me from?

    Hadj hangs up.

    giphy (3).gif
     

    dustingaunder

    Untitled
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Dec 11, 2008
    1,086
    1,936
    Oklahoma City, OK
    www.google.com
    They got my mom pretty good recently. No money lost but the scam was on point. The number displayed on CID was the county sheriff’s office, guy claimed to be an officer that really works for the SO and claimed to have a warrant signed by an actual judge in the county. Luckily her boss is the ex-chief of police where she lives and he was there at work. He knew the officer and when that detail came up the scammer bailed. Pretty elaborate I was impressed when she told me about it.
     
    • Angry
    • Wow
    Reactions: Jgunner and 6.5SH

    6.5SH

    Major Hide Member
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Jul 24, 2020
    1,204
    1,528
    They got my mom pretty good recently. No money lost but the scam was on point. The number displayed on CID was the county sheriff’s office, guy claimed to be an officer that really works for the SO and claimed to have a warrant signed by an actual judge in the county. Luckily her boss is the ex-chief of police where she lives and he was there at work. He knew the officer and when that detail came up the scammer bailed. Pretty elaborate I was impressed when she told me about it.
    That is way more elaborate and detailed than most. Was the scammer a native english speaker?
     

    TxWelder35

    Supporter
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Oct 17, 2018
    2,125
    2,730
    DFW
    There are some Youtube videos of guys that let "Microsoft" scammers connect to their computers. While they are stringing the scammers along, they actually hack into the scammers' computers and delete files. Pretty entertaining stuff.

    The best I've herd is guys that almost got a scammer killed by sending him to Chad near Darfur. https://www.thisamericanlife.org/363/enforcers/act-one
    Dude that saga of sending that guy around Chad should be mandatory Internet reading. Holy cow
     
    • Haha
    Reactions: MCHOG

    Charger442

    Sergeant
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Nov 2, 2010
    2,013
    1,848
    South Texas
    where is the audio of the comedian who had a recorder hooked to his phone so he could mess with telemarketers? The one that made the caller freak out was he told him he was a detective and the person he called had been murdered and started asking all the questions about "how do you know, John Doe? what was your business with him? i need your name and full contact info because we need to bring you in for questioning". it was fantastic. my google must be weak, i cant find it.
     
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    Foul Mike

    Gunny Sergeant
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Apr 18, 2001
    2,899
    4,335
    Eastern Colorado
    Yesterday I got a call about Social Security. It had been about 2 weeks from the last one. I played it to the Hilt, and had them stuck but there is NO Hadji that can cuss as well as I do,-- but they try. It is really comical when after I have taken up so much of their time going on and on and giving them Off the Wall numbers that they spool up and tell me "I am going to Fuck your Mother." OK, go ahead Assbreath. "You are a Necrophilite and want to stick you dick in a bunch of bones?" "She has been dead for 20 years, what can you tell me about this mental condition that you have?" "Can I help you with that?"
    It takes a while to learn how to waste their time but it can be done and you have to know how to lead them on til they explode, then the fun happens.
    I seldom get many calls these days, but take the ones I get, I take them soley for the entertainment value. I haven't much else to do, so call me.
    I think I am now on their Shit List as it doesn't happen too often. But when it does, Game On.
     

    BLKWLFK9

    Just F'n Send It..
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Feb 13, 2017
    2,699
    4,253
    I have found that a loud whistle, while not near the entertainment value (very well said BTW), will result in the offending party hangin up immediately.

    I like your approach mo bettah though! Guess I'm lazy...

    Thanks for the hearty belly laugh!

    i bought 2 air horns for this reason.
     
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    Foul Mike

    Gunny Sergeant
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Apr 18, 2001
    2,899
    4,335
    Eastern Colorado
    My Squaw uses a dog whistle and it uncunts them every time. Dial tone. Done

    I prefer to play with them. I am the nastiest pig fucker in the world when I really get them unspooled and into a lashup.

    You would not believe some of the exiting comments after I just set up an account for Joe Bogotrod and it dawns on them that this whole thing is BullShit and they have been played.

    Burner phone --just like theirs. No Fucks to Give. Call back later. I have plenty of time but rarely get a call anymore. Shit List??
     
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    Kiba

    Major Hide Member
    PX Member
    Minuteman
    Jan 13, 2011
    1,344
    350
    Central Valley, CA
    where is the audio of the comedian who had a recorder hooked to his phone so he could mess with telemarketers? The one that made the caller freak out was he told him he was a detective and the person he called had been murdered and started asking all the questions about "how do you know, John Doe? what was your business with him? i need your name and full contact info because we need to bring you in for questioning". it was fantastic. my google must be weak, i cant find it.

    Tom Mabe is who you're thinking of.
     

    1moaoff

    Safe space provider? Nope!!!
    Supporter
    PX Member
    Minuteman
  • Nov 16, 2008
    3,005
    6,485
    cincinnati, ohio
    That one and the credit card debt relief i always try to talk to.

    The credit people ask if I have any credit card debt.... I go on qith them and at the end tell them I'm a business and I pay it off every month but why should I when they will take care of it.

    The SS idiots that call i tell them im actually waiting on benefits to be approved... but I act old and deaf until they hang up