• Watch Out for Scammers!

    We've now added a color code for all accounts. Orange accounts are new members, Blue are full members, and Green are Supporters. If you get a message about a sale from an orange account, make sure you pay attention before sending any money!

Maggie’s Star Spangled BJ

Minx

Sergeant
Full Member
Minuteman
Jul 1, 2010
329
0
31
Orlando, FL
This joke is long and slightly dirty, but pretty funny. Thought you gys would appreciate it.
-------------------------------------------

So this guy is walking home from work one day when he passes by an alley. A hooker approaches him and asks him if he wants to buy a blowjob for $20.

The guy finds that that's pretty fucking expensive for a blowjob, so he says no. She assures him that it will be the greatest blowjob that he's ever had. So, eager to test that theory out, he pays her and brings her back to his dorm room.

So they get into his room and she turns off the lights so that it's pitch black. She unbuckles his belt and starts going to town, and as she's doing this, she also starts singing the Star Spangled Banner. Once she gets to the end of the song, he blows his load and the guy admits that it was indeed the best blowjob he's ever gotten.

So his roomate gets home and he tells him about how the hooker gave him the best blowjob of his life while singing the Star Spangled Banner. His friend was skeptical, so he decides to hire the hooker out to see if that's really true. Sure enough she comes into his room, turns the lights off and starts blowing him while singing The Star Spangled banner, and as the song finishes, so does he.

So he was pretty amazed by this, but also curious. He goes to his friend and says "Alright man, we need to find out how she's doing that. So here's what we're going to do. I'll hide in the closet and you hire her tomorrow. Once she starts, anytime into it, I want you to burst in and turn on the lights."

So his friend agrees to the plan. The next day, they hire the hooker, while one of them remained hidden in the closet the entire time. So sure enough, the hooker turns the lights off and begins working on him. She's giving him the blowjob of his life, and once she finally gets to the songs famous high note "And the home of the freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee", the other roomate quickly bursts out of the closet and turns the light on.

He looks at the hooker and sees his friend's dick in one of her hands, and a glass eye in the other.
 
Re: Star Spangled BJ

That's wrong in so many ways.
 
Re: Star Spangled BJ

It's SO funny. When I first heard it, I was like "....................OH MY GOD." and once I understood, I just laughed and laughed and laughed.
 
Re: Star Spangled BJ

well you know how she lost the eye in the first place, she is just making the best of a situation. nice one minx