@Devildog and
@fpgt72 , I just got out of a conversation with a very hard working, positive millennial about this. They are about to graduate and have 8 months until they go onto a certification test that is required. Bu they cannot find a job anywhere at the moment, even hourly part time at menial jobs so they are understandably frustrated. I told them that they are going about everything correctly, and this is just life - keep pushing until you break through. Breaking through right now may mean two or more part time jobs, which won't kill them and will probably yield some good life lessons early (how to handle money, among other things). But while reflecting on that talk I was left with the conclusion that we all aspire to be more than what we are when we are young, and that's good. But there comes a point in most people's lives where they are not where they wanted to be and they look back and ask 'what if". I know i have done it - a different decision here or there and what would have the outcome have been? What I do know is that there is madness in that thought process and a lot of living can be lost by constantly regretting and looking back. Somewhere in the gap between "what could have been" and reality a person needs to be able to find peace and satisfaction. That starts with looking at and acknowledging the good things in our lives; children, safe homes, loving someone and being loved. Those are the building blocks to any degree of real success, yet we tend to overlook those things for other "successes" that have a price tag that includes making those essentials far lower on the priority list.
A simple meal. Like cornbread and chili without beans. A sunrise. A good dog that is your bud. A garden. A workshop. A job well done, no matter how small. Puring positivity and usable advice into young lives that are just starting. There are SO many things we take for granted that we really need to appreciate. This also includes understanding when ships have sailed and saying goodbye to them. If there is life still left to live and those situations can never be had we need to let them go, do something else we determine is worthwhile and enjoy it. There is no need to sour today and tomorrow over yesterday's decisions. I didn't tell my millennial bud that piece - its too early in their life to understand it and they need to be striving because that is the stage of life they are in. But I have learned that it is true.
We bog ourselves down for no real reason. We need to offer ourselves forgiveness and the grace to live our lives without the baggage of needless regret. I'm starting to sound like the old people who coached me back in the day but also beginning to understand how wrong I was and how right they were.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but I know I do, and to be reminded of it.