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Sidearms & Scatterguns CCW Pistol Suggestions for Wife

GriffSniper

Private
Minuteman
Mar 8, 2020
19
5
Hi Guys,

The wife just got her CCW and we're looking for a pistol for her. We're looking for something compact to subcompact in 9mm caliber under $1,000. What makes it a little more complicated is that she is adamant that the pistol have a safety which is convenient to engage/disengage. She was leaning hard towards a manual safety but it appears a hand grip safety such as those found on 1911 or Springfield XD would suffice. I know most people say not to have a safety on a ccw pistol, but this is what she wants and a pistol on safety is better than no pistol at all. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! Thanks!
 
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There is pretty much the perfect pistol for your wife.

The SIG P365 with manual safety.

You'll be hard pressed to find anything that fits what she wants better than that.

You have a choice of standard size or the XL version.

Standard sights, slick slide sights, laser, red dot

I'm a big proponent of a manual safety on my carry gun.

Have her try holding the P365 (especially with the magazine that has the extended grip) or the P365XL and try shooting it and I think there is a very good chance she'll be hooked.

Expect to pay in the $500ish range new
 
HK P30sk is available with or without a safety.
9mm, adjustable grip panels on three sides, and can be found for sub $600 new.
E897FDAF-1284-4C5B-9401-5F9586D4DB37.jpeg
 
HK P30sk is available with or without a safety.
9mm, adjustable grip panels on three sides, and can be found for sub $600 new.

The H&K P30SK is a great pistol however it's a lot bulkier than the P365

I have both and carry the P365
 
Consider this...SW 642 Airweight. 38+p. This is an excellent weapon. No need for a safety. It has a shrouded hammer and is double action. Completely safe to carry as it has a hammer block...you can throw this out an airplane and it won't go off. Small, lightweight, just pull the trigger. This is what I gave my wife to carry. Throw it in a purse, nothing to catch on and accidently pull the trigger. It will not jam...just keep pulling the trigger...no failure to extract, failure to eject, etc.
1591669364443.png

OVERVIEW
Features

• Lightweight Alloy Frame for Easy Carry
• Stainless steel barrel and cylinder
• Snag-Free Enclosed Hammer
• Rated for Continuous +P Use

Smith & Wesson J-Frame revolvers have had your back since 1950. These small revolvers were designed to fire a full power round and are as simple and easy to use as they are reliable. Available in various calibers and with three diverse hammer designs, it is no surprise that the Smith & Wesson J-Frame has become the most popular, small-frame, defense revolver on the market.

The Model 642 is a variation of the Model 42 Centennial Airweight® that integrates the time-tested features of the original with modern advancements.

ALL BACKED BY OUR SMITH & WESSON LIFETIME SERVICE POLI
 
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My wife Carrie's a Sig P365 with safety and she loves it and is very lethal with it.

Having a safety is fine as long as she trains with the safety. Clicking the safety off needs to be muscle memory.
 
Another vote for M&P compact. You can get the smaller EZ with a thumb safety, she might be good with the grip safety only vs both.
 
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Do they make the M&P 9mm EZ with a manual safety?

they seem to be agreat option.
This is an excellent choice. Very compact, easy to operate, magazines are very easy to load, grip safety and, if desired, frame mounted thumb safety. Probably as close to perfect as a carry pistol for a woman can be. I bought one for my thirteen year old daughter and she loves it. She struggled to use a Glock 19, but has no issue with this. Only possible drawback is single stack capacity, but that is what makes it so pleasant to carry.
 
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Consider this...SW 642 Airweight. 38+p. This is an excellent weapon. No need for a safety. It has a shrouded hammer and is double action. Completely safe to carry as it has a hammer block...you can throw this out an airplane and it won't go off. Small, lightweight, just pull the trigger. This is what I gave my wife to carry. Throw it in a purse, nothing to catch on and accidently pull the trigger. It will not jam...just keep pulling the trigger...no failure to extract, failure to eject, etc.
View attachment 7346836
OVERVIEW
Features

• Lightweight Alloy Frame for Easy Carry
• Stainless steel barrel and cylinder
• Snag-Free Enclosed Hammer
• Rated for Continuous +P Use

Smith & Wesson J-Frame revolvers have had your back since 1950. These small revolvers were designed to fire a full power round and are as simple and easy to use as they are reliable. Available in various calibers and with three diverse hammer designs, it is no surprise that the Smith & Wesson J-Frame has become the most popular, small-frame, defense revolver on the market.

The Model 642 is a variation of the Model 42 Centennial Airweight® that integrates the time-tested features of the original with modern advancements.

ALL BACKED BY OUR SMITH & WESSON LIFETIME SERVICE POLI
Absolutely NOT a handgun I would recommend for any woman (and most men) as their first one.
 
Unsure what @308pirate 's reason for objecting to @buffalowinter 's suggestion is but I am in agreement with both those fine gentlemen.

A) Id suggest a revolver. Manual of arms is simple - no safety, immediate action is to repull the trigger. Not likely to malfunction nor is it hindered by bad form nor is it inoperable when some other feature fails such as a magazine not seated properly.

B) I would not recommend a "lightweight" revolver. Sure the alloy guns are super lightweight. They practically disappear and are forgotten about they are that lightweight. The cost for that benefit is they are hand stingers. Do any serious practice with a carry round they can get wearing. Id suggest a steel frame revolver. The weight penalty though greater than the alloy pistol in reality they are not that much heavier than a semi auto alternative.

If the idea is "DEFENSE" than a revolver is perfect for the idea "this is only to allow me to stop a threat and escape". Dont go to areas where you actually think you would need a gun and if you are in an area that suddenly gets dicey - go home.

If the concealed carry idea is expected to transition to offense - get a truck rifle.

She could be old school cool.......

1591703428172.png
 
B) I would not recommend a "lightweight" revolver. Sure the alloy guns are super lightweight. They practically disappear and are forgotten about they are that lightweight. The cost for that benefit is they are hand stingers. Do any serious practice with a carry round they can get wearing.
This is why I disagreed with Major Jones. And I come to my stance from personal experience as my second handgun ever and first CCW piece was a 637.

With its tiny rubber boot grips it would rip the shit out of the web of my right hand after just 50 rounds of +P ammo, to the point that I would leave blood stains on the gun. And I don't have soft hands......


The brown haired babe seems like she knows her way around handguns, at least going by her grip, stance, and head position. I wouldn't fuck with her.
 
Don't practice with +P loads. We use light Cowboy Action loads for practice...they're cheaper, very low recoil, low noise and lead to good practice of fundamentals such as trigger squeeze, etc. For actual carry, switch to plus-p. In areal situation, with adrenaline flowing, you won't notice the recoil at all. For a woman, these grips are just right. For me, I've shot enough that the grips are easy to compensate for. I really like revolvers for carry unless you are a hi-risk person who has an increased chance of need. For the average person, just out and about, a think a revolver has a lot to offer.
 
I agree with avoiding a "lightweight" revolvers. They are very difficult to shoot well and are for more advanced users. I carry a steel K frame myself because I can shoot it much better than a lightweight J frame.

Here is my 64-2, but a 65/66 with a 3" barrel would be great as well. I prefer older S&W revolvers, no internal locks, MIM parts, and pre 1982 you get pinned barrels.
0_IMG_20200526_160521.jpg
 
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Don't practice with +P loads. We use light Cowboy Action loads for practice...they're cheaper, very low recoil, low noise and lead to good practice of fundamentals such as trigger squeeze, etc.
The difference in recoil between bunny fart loads and 158 grain +P (which is what S&W Airweights are regulated for) is significant in such light revolvers. It's enough for someone who puts thousands of handgun rounds a month downrange (like me) to notice.

And if I notice (not in a good way), someone who will most likely never practice with the real deal will definitely be degraded in accuracy due to the startle at a point (a deadly force confrontation) when that same adrenaline will degrade everything else anyway.

I used to think like you when it comes to revolvers vs semi autos. I don't any more. When you put as much ammo as I do through both types, the old myths about revolver reliability and semi auto unreliability begin to fall apart under scrutiny. Plus why would I burden myself with 35 ounces of K frame worth six rounds when I can strap on 27 ounces of CZ worth sixteen rounds?
 
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Shield shield or maybe a shield oh ya by the way I would get her a shield. If you wanted to spend a little more get her the performance center shield. Amazing little pistol and the price couldn’t be better.
 
My thirteen year old daughter opted for a thumb safety on her EZ, as she learned to shoot with a STI Trojan 9mm single action and she said her muscle memory had her feeling for a non existent safety on my G19. She first tried a G43, but found the slide hard to rack and the mags difficult to fill. Very happy with her S&W.

My wife and children have access to a lot of different handguns to try. None of them shoot well with a snub nosed revolver. They have all shot J frames and Colt D frames enough to know that's a poor choice for a primary handgun for them . I did my best to offer them the opportunity to shoot anything in the safe, and they know my fondness for S&W revolvers, and they've all chosen 9mm autos, either single or "safe" actions.
 
My thirteen year old daughter opted for a thumb safety on her EZ, as she learned to shoot with a STI Trojan 9mm single action and she said her muscle memory had her feeling for a non existent safety on my G19. She first tried a G43, but found the slide hard to rack and the mags difficult to fill. Very happy with her S&W.

My wife and children have access to a lot of different handguns to try. None of them shoot well with a snub nosed revolver. They have all shot J frames and Colt D frames enough to know that's a poor choice for a primary handgun for them . I did my best to offer them the opportunity to shoot anything in the safe, and they know my fondness for S&W revolvers, and they've all chosen 9mm autos, either single or "safe" actions.


The deciding factor is they have to "like" and "want" what they decide on.

For people that arent shooters I recommend training first.

My sis has been wanting to get a handgun for a few years.

Guy at Kittery Trading suggested a 1911 despite her not knowing shit.

She just signed up for classes at Sig Sauer, all female. She will likely get to try anything and everything in the Sig line because in addition to good training their beginner courses have a component of salesmanship included.

She will come out of that with good knowledge and a handgun she got at discount that she likes and is trained on.

....and it will be a semi.

The revolver is great for the bedside/handbag carrier/field use/front pocket of cargo shorts.

I find carry a steel J very convenient. The 27-2 is a tank of a field gun, my new to me 19-4 is the perfect field gun and the K-22 is the funnest thing since self gratification was discovered.

Any time I want to feel "upgunned" Im wearing a Colt Commander.
 
SHE has to be the one making the selection, otherwise she will not be nearly as inclined to carry it. Think of it as someone choosing your carry gun for you...and just how attached to it you would be.

However, there is nothing wrong with narrowing down her options to a half-dozen models and letting her choose from that.

This is a great day and age for concealed carry as there are so many good options.
 
Thank you everyone for the good feedback. I've put the following pistols on my list to have the wife take a look at:

Sig P365
S&W M&P EZ 9
H&K P30sk

I think I'm personally leaning more towards the sig P365. Funny, I'm a huge Sig fan (love my Mk25) but I hadn't heard of the Sig P365 before. Seems like a great gun granted I haven't laid my hands on one in person. Let me know if there's another gun I should add to the list!
 
Thank you everyone for the good feedback. I've put the following pistols on my list to have the wife take a look at:

Sig P365
S&W M&P EZ 9
H&K P30sk

I think I'm personally leaning more towards the sig P365. Funny, I'm a huge Sig fan (love my Mk25) but I hadn't heard of the Sig P365 before. Seems like a great gun granted I haven't laid my hands on one in person. Let me know if there's another gun I should add to the list!

The only and biggest downside to the P365 is it is stiff when new. Both the slide and magazines. I had to load the magazines for my wife until they were broken in some. She did have a little issue with the slide at first but doesn't have any issue now with well over 500 rounds down range.

Just wanted to let you know before you got too biased toward it.
 
SHE has to be the one making the selection, otherwise she will not be nearly as inclined to carry it. Think of it as someone choosing your carry gun for you...and just how attached to it you would be.

However, there is nothing wrong with narrowing down her options to a half-dozen models and letting her choose from that.

This is a great day and age for concealed carry as there are so many good options.

^^^^^^ this right here times 100. Help her narrow it down and then step back and let her choose.
 
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Glock 43 or 19 with a holster she is comfortable with. Take it apart and show her how the safety works to give her piece of mind.
 
My wife carries a Kimber Micro 9 with the extended mag. She handles it very good, slide is easy to rack and just works for her. She has a Kimber Ultra Diamond 4” in 45ACP but a little uncomfortable with it due to being a little harder to rack, especially if she was in a dire situation...
She’s definitely accurate with both, she shot better than most when men when she took her CC class..
 
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if you pick it- she can blame you

my suggestion- find an indoor range that has a lot of rentals... A place near LAX Airport has a massive selection.

For $20 + ammo, you can try all of their guns... one at a time...

Which one is comfortable to her?
Which one can she rack the slide on with ease?


Friends have a Ruger LC9 and they can't hit anything... its too hard of a gun to shoot for them.... It fits the requirement for an external safety, but the trigger is a bastard...


If she like shooting it, then she will enjoy practice and classes.... If she does not like the gun.... the rest is not relevant...
 
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The only and biggest downside to the P365 is it is stiff when new. Both the slide and magazines. I had to load the magazines for my wife until they were broken in some. She did have a little issue with the slide at first but doesn't have any issue now with well over 500 rounds down range.

Just wanted to let you know before you got too biased toward it.

I just sold my first gen Shield 9mm to a friend and am looking at either the P365 or the G43X.... Has Sig fixed all the issues with the 365? I know they ran through like 3 gens of them pretty quick trying to fix various issues. Always concerns me
 
Hi Guys,

The wife just got her CCW and we're looking for a pistol for her. We're looking for something compact to subcompact in 9mm caliber under $1,000. What makes it a little more complicated is that she is adamant that the pistol have a safety which is convenient to engage/disengage. She was leaning hard towards a manual safety but it appears a hand grip safety such as those found on 1911 or Springfield XD would suffice. I know most people say not to have a safety on a ccw pistol, but this is what she wants and a pistol on safety is better than no pistol at all. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! Thanks!

Another vote for M&P compact. You can get the smaller EZ with a thumb safety, she might be good with the grip safety only vs both.
 
My son teaches CCW classes, both he and his wife carry the M&P!
 
Get her to a range and try a bunch out. Trust me. Everything you guess will be wrong. I'm a regular and well-practiced shooter, she's an occasional shooter. I figured my old M&P Shield 9 would be perfect for her. Boy was I wrong.

My better half is the same way; she wanted a manual safety, but hated every subcompact 9mm with manual safety she shot. She's since bogarted my Glock 42 and a decent Kydex holster... still trying to get her to shift from off body to on body carry, but as long as she's using a dedicated cross-body bag, it's not too bad.

As far as lightweight J-Frames? Yes, they're good solutions on paper... but I find them to be more of an aficionado's gun... takes lots of practice to get good, and a lot of willpower to practice more than ~50 rounds at a time.
 
I just sold my first gen Shield 9mm to a friend and am looking at either the P365 or the G43X.... Has Sig fixed all the issues with the 365? I know they ran through like 3 gens of them pretty quick trying to fix various issues. Always concerns me

The issues on the 365 were rare and over hyped by people desperate to get more hits on their YouTube videos.
You are unlikely to have any issues with any current production modules.
 
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I just sold my first gen Shield 9mm to a friend and am looking at either the P365 or the G43X.... Has Sig fixed all the issues with the 365? I know they ran through like 3 gens of them pretty quick trying to fix various issues. Always concerns me
Agree with W54/XM-388 - the issues with the P365 were a bit overstated (just like everyone believing the Glock 44 is a ticking timebomb - to the best of my knowledge its only 3 or 4 guns that are talked about over and over again). Sig made updates to the design and I haven't heard any issues with recent production.
 
Hi Guys,

The wife just got her CCW and we're looking for a pistol for her. We're looking for something compact to subcompact in 9mm caliber under $1,000. What makes it a little more complicated is that she is adamant that the pistol have a safety which is convenient to engage/disengage. She was leaning hard towards a manual safety but it appears a hand grip safety such as those found on 1911 or Springfield XD would suffice. I know most people say not to have a safety on a ccw pistol, but this is what she wants and a pistol on safety is better than no pistol at all. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! Thanks!
Shield easy rack in .380 is a nice gun to carry
 
My suggestion is whatever she can shoot and shoot repeatedly. There isn’t one single firearm that is similar with my female students. Have her shoot a variety before she makes up her mind.
 
3 pistols I’d consider. P365xl, S&W Shield or the M&P compact. Of those 3 I like the P365xl the most. It’s the same size as a G43x but has 12+1 capacity. I normally carry a G19 during the cooler months and the P365xl when wearing shorts and T-Shirts. Regardless let her pick from a number of weapons. It would be great if you could go to a range that would have all three as rentals so she can shoot them and then make a choice.
 
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+1 on renting a bunch of guns and letting her try them out herself

let her shoot your guns to just get used to shooting in general, then keep trying out different guns

Shield & M&P compact 3.5 are both great guns, not against the P365 just haven't shot one

I would not recommend getting her an Airweight rev, maybe an all stainless if you must go rev

Honestly, it's worth getting her a service/combat sized gun for home/range/practice and getting her used to that gun (few thousand rounds)

THEN letting her choose her own carry gun. M&P compact 3.5 or full size or HK are great choices. Glocks are great if she gets over the thumb safety issue
 
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My wife Carrie's a Sig P365 with safety and she loves it and is very lethal with it.

Really, What has she killed with it ?

Don't buy her any kind of firearm until you have had a serious heart to heart discussion with her on the use of Deadly Force and all that goes with killing another person, and she is good with it, or in the heat of the moment she will hesitate and the bandit will then have her weapon to kill you and her both.
 
Really, What has she killed with it ?

Don't buy her any kind of firearm until you have had a serious heart to heart discussion with her on the use of Deadly Force and all that goes with killing another person, and she is good with it, or in the heat of the moment she will hesitate and the bandit will then have her weapon to kill you and her both.

Don't underestimate women, you'd be surprised how many of them are way more willing to pull the trigger than a man would be.
There are a lot of women out there very happy to see somebody bleed if some motherfucker would just give them an excuse.

I'm not sure they will be thinking about killing or not, they will be more than likely thinking about wanting to see that bastard in pain and doing some good bleeding.

Or maybe I've just spent most of my life around angry, bitter, violent women?
 
My wife Carrie's a Sig P365 with safety and she loves it and is very lethal with it.

Really, What has she killed with it ?

Don't buy her any kind of firearm until you have had a serious heart to heart discussion with her on the use of Deadly Force and all that goes with killing another person, and she is good with it, or in the heat of the moment she will hesitate and the bandit will then have her weapon to kill you and her both

Neither you nor I wants to be the idiot that puts her to the test. I have been married to her for 31 years and can guarantee you that she wouldn't hesitate for an instant to protect what is hers.
 
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I didn't read every reply as I have been down this road already.

Let her pick.

Let her pick.

Let her pick. Go to a rental range and spend the money. Don't cheap out and puss out (meaning having a big ego cuz you're the man) and let her decide what works best for her.

You can point her in the right direction and make suggestions, but it's ultimately her choice.

I'd start with:
Glock 26, easy to shoot, bit heavy, no safety
Glock 42, easy to shoot and carry but no safety
Shield in 9mm, easy to shoot but a bit heavy
Sig 365, easy to carry, but not as easy to shoot as the shield.

I've been thru most of the compact carry guns. The Glock 26 and sw shield are the betters weapons. There's better "guns", but we are looking for the best weapon for her.


To me, the Glock 43 sucks, and I'm a Glock guy, but it's too snappy. The xds is too heavy for what it is. The sig 938 is too snappy but really nice to carry.
 
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The Hellcat from Springfield armory is another must-try I can pick up the sight quicker than the 365. With 11+1 or 13+1 in a micro you get enough rounds to sort things out.
As far as a woman being able to deliver a shot. Some may be passive about themselves but endanger her kids and all bets are off.