I just found this site. Sorry if this is old, I just though it was hilarious!
http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/
http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/
Mall ninjas
- Thread starter callen3615
- Start date
Re: Mall ninjas
Heard the references for years, but never saw the actual thread before. Hilarious.
Heard the references for years, but never saw the actual thread before. Hilarious.
Re: Mall ninjas
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Tim K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Heard the references for years, but never saw the actual thread before. Hilarious. </div></div>+1 I'm in shock right now.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Tim K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Heard the references for years, but never saw the actual thread before. Hilarious. </div></div>+1 I'm in shock right now.
Re: Mall ninjas
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">The ducttape solution, although tactically sound, is hot and painful to remove. I would like to go to the single-plate solution in back. What I am worried about is repeated hits to that area with .308 ammunition. </div></div>
That's one tough mall.
The sense of duty is inspiring...sniff...
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">The ducttape solution, although tactically sound, is hot and painful to remove. I would like to go to the single-plate solution in back. What I am worried about is repeated hits to that area with .308 ammunition. </div></div>
That's one tough mall.
The sense of duty is inspiring...sniff...
Re: Mall ninjas
I have not laughed as hard as I did reading this in quite awhile.
This in particular may have ruined my keyboard....
"BTW A one time experiementation while in the military, does not make one a homosexual. It’s when you practice it daily, like yourself, that you become a homosexual."
WTF! I'm still trying to figure out if that was intended to be an admission or what. LOL
I have not laughed as hard as I did reading this in quite awhile.
This in particular may have ruined my keyboard....
"BTW A one time experiementation while in the military, does not make one a homosexual. It’s when you practice it daily, like yourself, that you become a homosexual."
WTF! I'm still trying to figure out if that was intended to be an admission or what. LOL
Re: Mall ninjas
It just dawned on me. This must be were the movie Observe and Report got its inspiration. haha
It just dawned on me. This must be were the movie Observe and Report got its inspiration. haha
Re: Mall ninjas
I just showed it to my co-worker.
his response "What scares me...........these people may actually possess guns!!!"
I just showed it to my co-worker.
his response "What scares me...........these people may actually possess guns!!!"
Re: Mall ninjas
Gecko45..............he's on crack and a tool but, he does have boots that let him climb walls and is a Master of three Martial Arts Disciplines.
Multiple .338 Lapua hits in the back.........yea, right.
Gecko45..............he's on crack and a tool but, he does have boots that let him climb walls and is a Master of three Martial Arts Disciplines.
Multiple .338 Lapua hits in the back.........yea, right.
Re: Mall ninjas
My local mall has officers patrolling the perimeter on electric powered vehicles. I think of that story and crack up every time I see them.
My local mall has officers patrolling the perimeter on electric powered vehicles. I think of that story and crack up every time I see them.
Re: Mall ninjas
This can't be real, but on the flip side you can't make that kind of BS up.
This has got to be a couple of guys screwing with people on those forums, its hard for me to believe anyone would make up such claims and expect anyone to even remotely believe it.
This can't be real, but on the flip side you can't make that kind of BS up.
This has got to be a couple of guys screwing with people on those forums, its hard for me to believe anyone would make up such claims and expect anyone to even remotely believe it.
Re: Mall ninjas
Seriously tough mall. People laying down 338LM fire just to get in line at the pizza stand.
Seriously tough mall. People laying down 338LM fire just to get in line at the pizza stand.
Re: Mall ninjas
My local mall spec opz team only has segways..well. segWAY they take turns. I also didnt realize they made mountain bike helmets with kevlar now. Looks like I'm done buying the kids shoes until this is under control!
My local mall spec opz team only has segways..well. segWAY they take turns. I also didnt realize they made mountain bike helmets with kevlar now. Looks like I'm done buying the kids shoes until this is under control!
Re: Mall ninjas
I haven't been in a mall in at least 10 years....apparently that has saved me from gay rape, asian gangs and skin head attacks.
I haven't been in a mall in at least 10 years....apparently that has saved me from gay rape, asian gangs and skin head attacks.
Re: Mall ninjas
Really got hard to keep reading through that nonsense, some of it is just so stupid it makes me want to smack them.
"I will be completing my ninjisu training in a little over 8 months, and then I will be a Master of Ninjitsu, a true “Ninja”."
I died laughing at that part.
Really got hard to keep reading through that nonsense, some of it is just so stupid it makes me want to smack them.
"I will be completing my ninjisu training in a little over 8 months, and then I will be a Master of Ninjitsu, a true “Ninja”."
I died laughing at that part.
Re: Mall ninjas
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
BTW, I am, of course, usually carrying a pair of ceramic plates in my briefcase so that I can shield my head. My SO (we work as a team when necessary) has a similar accessory containing a breakdown NEF single-shot 300 WinMag with an 18" bbl. The plan is that I shield us with my body and “catch the rounds” while she assembles the NEF. I lay down covering fire with my 23 (Bar-Sto .357 Sig barrel) and she makes the long shots. I will then throw smoke grenades to obscure the area while continuing to lay covering fire. The problem, of course, is when I have to turn my back to run, and then the problem crops up.
</div></div>
I got vitamin water coming out my nose!!!!!!!!! Damn!!!
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
BTW, I am, of course, usually carrying a pair of ceramic plates in my briefcase so that I can shield my head. My SO (we work as a team when necessary) has a similar accessory containing a breakdown NEF single-shot 300 WinMag with an 18" bbl. The plan is that I shield us with my body and “catch the rounds” while she assembles the NEF. I lay down covering fire with my 23 (Bar-Sto .357 Sig barrel) and she makes the long shots. I will then throw smoke grenades to obscure the area while continuing to lay covering fire. The problem, of course, is when I have to turn my back to run, and then the problem crops up.
</div></div>
I got vitamin water coming out my nose!!!!!!!!! Damn!!!
Re: Mall ninjas
OMG Stop!!!! LOL
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
I the liutenant of a 3 man Rapid Tactical Force Team, in one of the nation’s largest indoor retail shopping centers.
</div></div>
OMG Now I can't breathe!!! Make it stop!!! LOL
One NEVER completes their training...
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
I will be completing my ninjisu training in a little over 8 months, and then I will be a Master of Ninjitsu, a true “Ninja”.
</div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
We use modified electric vehicles and can be anywhere on a given floor within eight and a half minutes.
</div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
The MP5 is carried discreetly, under the seats of the electric transportation cart, and we only wear BDU’s. </div></div>
OMG Stop!!!! LOL
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
I the liutenant of a 3 man Rapid Tactical Force Team, in one of the nation’s largest indoor retail shopping centers.
</div></div>
OMG Now I can't breathe!!! Make it stop!!! LOL
One NEVER completes their training...
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
I will be completing my ninjisu training in a little over 8 months, and then I will be a Master of Ninjitsu, a true “Ninja”.
</div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
We use modified electric vehicles and can be anywhere on a given floor within eight and a half minutes.
</div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
The MP5 is carried discreetly, under the seats of the electric transportation cart, and we only wear BDU’s. </div></div>
Re: Mall ninjas
As stupefying as that thread is for so many reasons, somehow I'm still stuck on the fact <span style="font-weight: bold">that motherjumper thought the Mall of America was a retail outlet!</span>
As stupefying as that thread is for so many reasons, somehow I'm still stuck on the fact <span style="font-weight: bold">that motherjumper thought the Mall of America was a retail outlet!</span>
Re: Mall ninjas
That was one of the most entertaining posts I've read online in quite some time +1. I did a little search and guess what http://www.myspace.com/tacticalsecurityenforcer his myspace page.
That was one of the most entertaining posts I've read online in quite some time +1. I did a little search and guess what http://www.myspace.com/tacticalsecurityenforcer his myspace page.
Re: Mall ninjas
I have not read it in a while. Thanks for bringing it back. I can only hope that at 48yo, I have the time and dedication to bring myself up to the skill level possessed by this man.
He is a hero.
I have not read it in a while. Thanks for bringing it back. I can only hope that at 48yo, I have the time and dedication to bring myself up to the skill level possessed by this man.
He is a hero.
Re: Mall ninjas
Dont laugh too hard about mall ninjas as they apparently do exist as I saw my wife watching a show called Mall Cops....no crap, a show about mall cops...and, as my wife proved, ppl actually watch that garbage!
Dont laugh too hard about mall ninjas as they apparently do exist as I saw my wife watching a show called Mall Cops....no crap, a show about mall cops...and, as my wife proved, ppl actually watch that garbage!
Re: Mall ninjas
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: The new guy</div><div class="ubbcode-body">This can't be real, but on the flip side you can't make that kind of BS up.
This has got to be a couple of guys screwing with people on those forums, its hard for me to believe anyone would make up such claims and expect anyone to even remotely believe it. </div></div>
It was scripted(made up)many years ago and posted on a firearms forum.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: The new guy</div><div class="ubbcode-body">This can't be real, but on the flip side you can't make that kind of BS up.
This has got to be a couple of guys screwing with people on those forums, its hard for me to believe anyone would make up such claims and expect anyone to even remotely believe it. </div></div>
It was scripted(made up)many years ago and posted on a firearms forum.
Re: Mall ninjas
I dunno - saw on one of the channels last night "Mall Cops" - real life exploits of those that protect and serve the shoppers of America.
I dunno - saw on one of the channels last night "Mall Cops" - real life exploits of those that protect and serve the shoppers of America.
Re: Mall ninjas
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BadBot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">for those who want to do research for glock talk and gekco45,
http://web.archive.org/web/*/http://glocktalk.com
years of history for your plesure. </div></div>
I was going to say....Google around a bit and the first post only scratches the surface.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BadBot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">for those who want to do research for glock talk and gekco45,
http://web.archive.org/web/*/http://glocktalk.com
years of history for your plesure. </div></div>
I was going to say....Google around a bit and the first post only scratches the surface.
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