What’s the difference between poor white trash dads with teenage daughters and regular white trash dads with teenage daughters?????
Stairs and a Coat hangers
Stairs and a Coat hangers
He would never share any of his porn stash... you of all people should know that!
Cheers,
Sirhr
Little Johnny and his sister come down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if they had done their chores.
"Not yet" said Little Johnny.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.
He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
"Well" his mother says "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk".
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
The father sits down in his chair and picks up the paper. "Hey dad, mom saw you kick the cat, so you know what that means!"
"What?
"No pussy for a week!" Johnny cries laughing.
Johnny's father, without looking up at him or his mother, says "How the fuck is that different from any other week?"
Upon hearing all of this, Johnny's sister runs out of the house and dashes for the rooster pen, only to get tackled by her father midway.
"Nice try" says her dad.
"Not yet" said Little Johnny.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.
He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
"Well" his mother says "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk".
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
The father sits down in his chair and picks up the paper. "Hey dad, mom saw you kick the cat, so you know what that means!"
"What?
"No pussy for a week!" Johnny cries laughing.
Johnny's father, without looking up at him or his mother, says "How the fuck is that different from any other week?"
Upon hearing all of this, Johnny's sister runs out of the house and dashes for the rooster pen, only to get tackled by her father midway.
"Nice try" says her dad.
A six-year-old goes to the hospital with her Grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa's room. "Grandpa, Grandpa" she says excitedly "as soon as Grandma comes into the room, can you please please please make a noise like a frog!" "What?" said her Grandpa. "Make a noise like a frog......pleeeaaassseee. Because Grandma said that as soon as you croak, we're all going to Disneyland!?
What do you call a girl who doesn't suck dick?
A cab.
A cab.
Met a beautiful girl down at the park today.
Sparks flew, she fell at my feet and we ended up having sex there and then.
God, I love my new Taser!
Sparks flew, she fell at my feet and we ended up having sex there and then.
God, I love my new Taser!
Two condoms were walking past a few bars in downtown San Francisco when they were in front of new gay bar, one condom looked to the other condom and said "you wanta go in and get SHIT FACED".
I had a Honda Accord with more ground clearance than that! As for the hitch I saw a pic of that part of the manual in one of the car magazines, the editor had to be laughing their asses off when they slipped that into the article.
@Claymorx - dod you have your mouth open and your tongue out a bit as you “re-enacted” that motion? ??
How are ya? Just mentioned you as the second IPA was almost gone.....
Was just Suggesting you need a SAA and appropriate holster rig to go with your sweet lever gun.
A nice hat (coon skin or nice 4x beaver Stetson) and both guns (and nothing more) is a good way to treat the Mrs for Valentines Day!
How are ya? Just mentioned you as the second IPA was almost gone.....
Was just Suggesting you need a SAA and appropriate holster rig to go with your sweet lever gun.
A nice hat (coon skin or nice 4x beaver Stetson) and both guns (and nothing more) is a good way to treat the Mrs for Valentines Day!
This is so freaking funny,
LOL.... SAA is always a good idea, already have the hat.
Probably what Frank is thinking anytime he gets a shit ton of reports from people for hurt feelings.
Yep, You just can't rub your eyes enough to rid you from that sight and you can't un-see it also
I’ve got more... just ask
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Who hasn’t been there?
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