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Maggie’s What do your local douchebags drive?

Much respect for the G-wagon, but the people driving them around my neck of the woods are tier-1 DBs.
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Members of the jury, I rest my case.
 
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minus the horse the kids are the pullers got to love free slave labor besides its good exercise for them and it teaches them team work lol also enforces the idea to get the hell out of the house asap .
 
Ironically I'm moving to Idaho in 3 weeks so yeah being from CA im sure jumping into another locale Douche-baggery scale my douchebag status will rise dramatically.

maybe I could show up to the local PSR match with a freshly trimmed beard, tank top, board shorts, and flip flops just to boost it further. 🤔

Nope. Everything but the shorts is correct.
Board shorts are out. Now you have to wear something resembling running shorts from the 70s and 80s. But they must show some toe.
 
According to yall I'm the DB: Audi 'SUV' modded TDI rolling coal passing you on the right doing 95+ at 33mpg cuz your dumass doesn't know to get the eff out of the way for faster traffic... LOL.
Well I guess I am a special kind of DB.

I drive an Audi A8. I have a Dodge diesel with a 6" exhaust tip (because at 1150 hp, I require a 5" exhaust system). And I just bought an F250 Tremor that has a winch.
I'm a douche!
But I'm not a poor, so there's that.
 
Mils vs moa.. turbo vs n/a. 243>6mm cm..... 350 vs 2.2 turbo.... its all the same story

I drive a 2wd 04, crew cab Super Duty Diesel with 309,000 miles. I pull a 1300lb 17' skiff with it. 😂

Yes, I run 80+ while towing because I don't have shitty bias ply tires on my trailer. 😁
My headlights suck. I'm thinking about installing a LED bar to run during the daylight hours....

I pass, then move over. ☹

And I just got my new gain twist Bartlein delivered today.
Guess which caliber?

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Oh, and I wear spandex on my road bike. Although now it has to stretch a bit more to go over my fat rolls.
I'm thinkin about wearing it to Walmart. 😉
 
Nope. Everything but the shorts is correct.
Board shorts are out. Now you have to wear something resembling running shorts from the 70s and 80s. But they must show some toe.
Are we talking Jane fonda?
Its not out of the range of possibilities.
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Pretty much in the clear on DB vehicles- 2006 Toyota Tundra 4door that I’ll never sell.... ever for (almost) any price, a 2007 GMC Sierra 2500 diesel and a 2015 Forest river FR3 class A motor home. All mostly stock.... Yoda says,” Low my Douch-baggery is”... hahaha! (Dammit.... don’t drink and post)
Hello fellow first gen enthusiast.
 
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Pretty much in the clear on DB vehicles- 2006 Toyota Tundra 4door that I’ll never sell.... ever for (almost) any price, a 2007 GMC Sierra 2500 diesel and a 2015 Forest river FR3 class A motor home. All mostly stock.... Yoda says,” Low my Douch-baggery is”... hahaha! (Dammit.... don’t drink and post)
Yes, but if at any point you’ve ever owned a Toyota that has had any part of its labels or badges scraped/broken off so it says Yota, or has a Yoda-ears Toyota emblem on it anywhere (or for that matter says something like “my Toy”) then it’s right back on the douche-wagon for you,
 
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Also, as a Mountain-west dweller, I’d like to add anyone driving a Vansion to this list….the more shit strapped to the outside, the bigger the douche.

This guy, for example, is surely an insufferable twit.
 

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Lifted 2wd Trucks with big mud tires... Dumbass.

Anyone who drives a 3 series BMW. 99% of the time a complete deuche bag.

Anyone who drives with spacers or offset so the tire sticks out of the fender well.
 
Yes, but if at any point you’ve ever owned a Toyota that has had any part of its labels or badges scraped/broken off so it says Yota, or has a Yoda-ears Toyota emblem on it anywhere (or for that matter says something like “my Toy”) then it’s right back on the douche-wagon for you,
Yeah... none of that garbage. Can’t stand that. decals, stickers, etc.... when you have to tell everyone else what you have, what you do where you stand , it diminishes credibility IMO.
 
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Exploring options on upping my Douchebaggery score moving to a new area.
For that, I personally recommend the “not from here, but I got here as soon as I could “ decal for the back window of your Subaru Outback..... you know why....😁
 
[QUOTE="GreenGO Juan, post: 9533358, member: 181429]
Anyone who drives with spacers or offset so the tire sticks out of the fender well.
[/QUOTE]
Something like whatever the eff is going on here?
 

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[QUOTE="GreenGO Juan, post: 9533358, member: 181429]
Anyone who drives with spacers or offset so the tire sticks out of the fender well.
Something like whatever the eff is going on here?
[/QUOTE]
Dude bought stock in a Auto Glass company and is trying to speed up return on investment.
 
Reduced backspace or spacers may be necessary when increasing tire size over stock. Even with an appropriate lift, the rub and scrub radius is dictated by backspace. Jumping from a 31” to a 35” tire will require wheels that stick out more than stock. You may not like it, but it may well be necessary for the use case for the vehicle in question.

An outback may not be a winner on the track, but I’d bet it does better in snow.
Better than what?
Yes.
Know your use case.

Reminds me of a story I read a while back. A guy is driving in a pretty heavy snow when he comes upon a road closure manned by the highway patrol (Some mountainous area- I don’t remember. Not important) He pulls up to a patrolman and rolls down his window. “Why are you stopping? You’re in a Subaru. Go!”
 
Reduced backspace or spacers may be necessary when increasing tire size over stock. Even with an appropriate lift, the rub and scrub radius is dictated by backspace. Jumping from a 31” to a 35” tire will require wheels that stick out more than stock. You may not like it, but it may well be necessary for the use case for the vehicle in question.

An outback may not be a winner on the track, but I’d bet it does better in snow.
Better than what?
Yes.
Know your use case.

Reminds me of a story I read a while back. A guy is driving in a pretty heavy snow when he comes upon a road closure manned by the highway patrol (Some mountainous area- I don’t remember. Not important) He pulls up to a patrolman and rolls down his window. “Why are you stopping? You’re in a Subaru. Go!”
Hate to admit it but my wife drives a Subaru. That thing is nearly unstoppable unless it’s a ground clearance issue or the snow is so deep that the car can’t push it out of the way.
 
What's that Subaru top at? 90?

LOL
Mine is running the stock exhaust from the cat back and will do over a buck fifty. The 362 lb ft to the wheels at 3,400 rpm makes it entertaining around town.
 
I drive a 2004 ford ranger tremor for my work truck, my 1991 camaro rs, 2010 kawasaki 650R, and when im lucky i get to drive my southern sport mod race car.
 
[QUOTE="GreenGO Juan, post: 9533358, member: 181429]
Anyone who drives with spacers or offset so the tire sticks out of the fender well.
Something like whatever the eff is going on here?
[/QUOTE]
There is a dually set up similar to this around here, but he has all chrome wheels with the bullet lug nut covers on the fronts, AND low profile tires.
 
No shortage of mall crawlers and Diesel's with no hitch on the back in Oklahoma but us rednecks try to keep em to a minimum. Things like this still baffle me but I guess I'm just getting older, bitchier, and don't have any fucks left
I keep my hitch inside when I don't have a trailer. It's not for decoration.
 
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A mini van is a sure sign of a shit driver. Every damn one drive under the speed limit, on their phone, or reading a fucking book....the last one isn't a joke.
 
A mini van is a sure sign of a shit driver. Every damn one drive under the speed limit, on their phone, or reading a fucking book....the last one isn't a joke.
I mean at that point you may as well be dead anyways, definitely dead inside lol.
 
Yeah, but it crashes faster than a Ferrari or a Lamborghini. But, only slightly.
 
A mini van is a sure sign of a shit driver. Every damn one drive under the speed limit, on their phone, or reading a fucking book....the last one isn't a joke.

LOL. About 20 years ago I'm heading out of town on a four lane with a 65 limit. A lady in a mini van behind me at the stop light is very anxious to get whereever. As soon as the left lane is clear, she whips out and passes me. I'm at about 70 so I decide to see how important being in front of me really is. I was driving an LS1 so no problem keeping up. At triple digits I let her go. Passed her about 10 miles later. The trooper didn't let her win.
 
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I bought that car as a commuter car to get around the city and especially because of all the other douche bag drivers.

What I didn’t realize was how freaking fast the car was. I mean it’s insanely fast.

Before I was a rather nice polite driver, trying to take it easy, with all the scumbags around me cutting people off, weaving in and out of traffic, and riding other peoples butts… etc.

Now… I’m not the problem, and I’m not the solution… but I dont have to be polite either. Heh.

it’s probably good I didn’t buy the track version… because I am definitely not your typical Tesla driver. Battery life who cares….
 
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The car you drive dose not make you a douche. If your a douchebag you will always be a douchebag dose not matter what kind of car you drive.

Like the gun control debate. Its not the guns fault. Its the douchebag who pulled the trigger.:D
 
Here in the front range the worst by far are Subarus. But the faux expedition vehicles are a close second. Usually Jeeps,Toyotas, and 4runners with 2k lbs of shit strapped to them, driving 10 under in the left lane on I70 to go park in the garage at vail.
 
We have a 300C model we take on long trips. No troubles with keeping up with traffic. :ROFLMAO: The gas pedal has a certain feel to it, and you can't floor it and expect it to not make a scene. well.. My wife and I drove it to work one day, and at the stop sign crossing the busy 4 lane main street, the wife gives it too much gas and breaks them loose, instead of changing her course of action, she just rolls with it, and does a nice burn out across mean street for everyone headed to school to see. Then starts laughing and lets off on the other side.

I did about the same across main street in Hays, KS except I was turning across the four lane, so mine was a little fancier, sliding and fish tailing and all. I felt it was a little more Dukes of Hazard.
 
Yup, Subarus here too. With roof racks and Bernie stickers. Lots of Bernie stickers.

Found this on the internet, but it's a solid example of the norm around here.

Fuck this fucking fuck!
 
I've driven in every state except RI. Driven in the biggest cities in the country, but I've never witnessed the crap I saw in Korea or the ME.
 
I keep my hitch inside when I don't have a trailer. It's not for decoration.
There is a difference in keeping your hitch ball inside and not having a hitch receiver at all. You can generally tell they don't have a fifth wheel receiver either.
 
Yup, Subarus here too. With roof racks and Bernie stickers. Lots of Bernie stickers.

Found this on the internet, but it's a solid example of the norm around here.

I do have to laugh just got back from grocery down the street. I pulled up next to a Lesbaru aka Subaru Outback and I said to myself 'oh the dyke-mobile!'. As I got out 2 bull dykes walk by me and get in it I about died.....PattiChris and BobbiJo heading home for an afternoon taste of carpet.
 
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For the most part in the state it's the Subaru Outback with all the stupid coexist, rainbow flag stickers. More locally, I see a ton of Jeeps and pickups decked out like they're about to climb Mt Kilimanjaro, but we all know they're the equivalent of the "operator as fuck" poser at the range
 
Almost every time the traffic is backed up on I-70 in Colorado, it's some Asshat with Illinois plates causing the problems because they think they own the fast lane, but they don't know what fast is.

I disagree. In my experience it's the fucking Texans and New Mexicans that always fail to understand what KEEP RIGHT EXCEPT TO PASS means
 
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