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I just got a call with a recording from U.S. Border Patrol and Customs. They seized a package under my name

TexPatriot

Two Star General
Full Member
Minuteman
Jul 20, 2020
8,501
20,532
They have issued an arrest warrant and I will be arrested within 24 hours. Should I remove my guns and ammo or bury them? Should I answer the door in my leather gimp suit and just giggle?

The voice on the recording had a strange accent.
 
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Probably the same guy that told me my driver's licence had been used illegally and that I would be arrested unless I paid the fine at Western Union. I played along and was transferred to his stupidvisor.

I told them I didn't have Western Union but that him and his band of monkey eating dipshits were welcome to come over to the house and kiss my ass.

He said I was a nasty old man and hung up - finally recognition!
 
I told one of these scam artists, flights are cheap and I can be on your door step tomorrow morning....he yelled at me, saying I wouldn't get past "security".....told him, then maybe I'll meet you in the parking lot? he no call me longtime....
 
Tell the border patrol to open the package, if there is anything worth a shit in it you'll split it with them. Assuming of course you're speaking to someone that understands English.
 
It sure would be nice if there was a way to locate these scammers!
 
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Sounds about as legitimate as bidoof is actually the legal president.
 
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Oh I do love this shit...

I'm not an easy fuck like some of you guys though.

I'll drag 'em on only if I feel like I have an opportunity to bring down the whole organization. And I did once, talk about pissed. Actually got threats against my life for a while. If I was on the E. Coast I have no doubt they'd have at least tried.

Long story short, they tried to scam me but I kept demanding more and more from them... I made it seem like I was genuinely interested by now and again agreeing with what they wanted. Like setup an account for this, or do that. I had them send some documents to me though and that was their undoing.

Worth mentioning FBI doesn't care. At all. If it's not $200k on the line, they don't lift a finger.

Fedex investigator did though. And since they sent that package to me from Nigeria, they were able to link over 30 different accounts to "Red Lion Corporation" or some such. Untold hundreds of scams were in process. And I had every single account cancelled, just like that. Every scam in progress got shut down, every person they ever dealt with got messages. Fedex works with the Nigerian govt. and they're just as corrupt but willing to cowtow in order to get what they want. So a bunch of 'em got run under the bus and rounded up. It was a major clusterfuck indeed.

Talk about PISSED! I only got 'em riled up more when I laughed at them and called 'em african hicks who couldn't come up with a proper putdown, always resorting to mothers fucking farm animals and I told them there must be some Freudian connection in a way they could understand.

Recently got a call from a medicare scam, they're getting better. Rattled off some shit, what's your SSN? Who are you again? Rattled off some shit, what's your birthday? Hold on, I'm asking the questions right now, who ar... Click. But I can only imagine how many old folks would fall for that one, it was pretty ingenious and the number went nowhere, not much to go on.
 
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My other half,,,while she was on the couch. Got arrested in Nigeria. She needs bail money asap. 🤔😜😆😅
 
Oh where are my manners! I just got this the other day...

Look at that "Code of Conduct" line --what's that say?

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$25million huh?
 
Yes, I got a person with an accent from India call yesterday. They told me they were with Social Security, and my social security account had been locked due to "suspicious activity". I asked them who they meant to call, and they seemed perplexed. I said, "you called me stating there was suspicious activity, so you must know WHO you are calling if this is legit".... a long pause.. then a click.
 
Probably the same ppl that sent me this nonsense(they texted my first and last name + address right before, then sent this:

Not gonna post the whole text convo.. but long story short I sent a picture of what me and mine will have waiting on him if he ever wants to try his luck.. and to GET FUCKED!

No clue wtf he’s talking about re: me going to no whore house... and just.... LOL at tracking me using my phone’s GPS.

Black msgs are obviously him, green are mine.

Entonces Senor Mauricio Andrade, come get some(assuming he’s Mexican- the word “knight” stuck out to me... common word among Mexican males is Caballero, which in Mexican Spanish transliterates to something closer to meaning “gentleman”, but direct Espanol->Ingles translation of Caballero = “knight”
Strange because Mauricio Andrade is much much more of a Brazilian name...
 

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