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Maggie’s Can you add to this?

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...bent over...

(i just wanted the 500th post on this thread
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JB
 
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...as they worked to organize the first annual and very festive John F Kerry Ball Shaving Contest named in honor of that shinning star of the recent Presidential race...
 
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..micky moore. The contest was to shave around his or her "outfit" and the ones looking and or smelling most like hillary and micky won. Out of the 59,385,026 contestants, the winners were announced. It was closer than a Presidental race in Florida, but the two winners were.....
 
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... Al Gore, irrepressable as First Runner Up for his "Balls in a lockbox routine" and, the winner by popular vote Hillary herself for her spectactular "Biggest Balls in the entire party" which was no surprise to...
 
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sue every Republican registered voter in the USA, citing "strong evidence" that they must have been removed at birth with forceps on their heads, just like the poor babies who channeled during his contemptible courtroom shenanigans.

Speaking of things Irish, ...
 
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Ted Kennedy, who is usually afflicted with verbal diarrhea and constipation of the brain, has become curiously quiet. Someone must have slipped some Immodium AD in his....
 
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..toddy, as the Phantom Pisser wrote "The party's over" in the New England snow and ended teddy's dreams of ....
 
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....getting Hillary in the sack. But undaunted, he quickly decided to slam down a few beers and drive over to....
 
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the Dike Bridge in Chappaquiddick for old times' sake. He wished he'd brought Elen Degeneres, Rosie O'Fatso, and Janet Reno, but those dykes were probably tied up -- literally.

"Ah, Mary Jo, my little blonde ho, why did you have to miss out on swim lessons during your days at summer camp?" he mused. "Goddam women, always causing problems for us Kennedy princes, including my poor nephew William. I must remember to send him a Neiman-Marcus soap-on-a-rope for Christmas".

Teddy then grabbed his cell phone and called...
 
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....his favorite dating service, 1-800-EWE4YOU. He no sooner disconnected (can't use teddy and hung in same sentence) from the dating service when Dr. Phil called wondering when....
 
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...they could get together to do the final planning for the Nigerian Scammers/Demo Leadership Xmas Ball set to honor that all time favorite...
 
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...Rudolph the red nosed reindeer. But then they remembered that they removed Christmas from the paid but don't want to offend holiday list. john connyers and maxine watters, hand and hand responded....
 
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mmmmmm...we both sure would like to get a piece of ass off that Barak Obama!

If he won't give it up we'll.....
 
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..the crack ground crew were mounting the twin 44dds on the Cuban Air Force marked MH53J's pivot points as the bad lieutenant smoked his cigar and smiled as he thought about what a great surprise this will be for that old commie when...
 
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...they are flying into Havana. Just then his F-22 escort pilots were walking up, asking if the C-130 was remarked an loaded.
As they were talking, Lowlight yelled, from the back the 130, while trying to put on his parachute.....
 
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...."Merry Christmas to all, and to all a Goodnight!" But what could it be that Lowlight had in the box to be dropped out of the plane as it passed over the klinton lie-bra-ie? Could it be a.....
 
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...home-made cluster bomb or flyers for his up-coming tupperware party? Before they could ask, the ground crew noticed...
 
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...that a slew of Hide members werer headed to Rochester to Visit Greg. In their hands they were carrying....
 
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...flowers, a "Get Well Soon" card, reloading supplies, Old Milwaukee's Best, cheap porn, the latest issue of Home & Garden magazine and a spud gun. As they were trying to get it all into their VW Bug, which was looking quite festive donned with garland and jingle bells, they realized they had forgotten...
 
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... a gift for the fair Celia (now be nice guys - she is a nice lady and a good wife)....
 
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...her dear husband who she nursed back to a complete recovery. Upon getting his release to shoot from his doctor Greg grabbed his infamous Dancer (chambered in 260 of course) and....
 
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President Bush singing "Auld Lang Syne" which medleyed into "A Country Boy Can Survive". "Greg," said the President, "I've got a job for ya. I need you and two of your best men to run down to...
 
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...run out and get me some video footage of....
 
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...glass pipe and reading the latest issue of "Corporate Stains". After hanging up the phone, Greg hears an odd noise coming from..
 
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....a small room off the Oval Office. Pushing the President aside to shield him from any danger, he slowly opens the door and sees....
 
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...fashion a field expedient full-body condom for Dubya, crooning all the time, "<span style="font-style: italic">I ain't got no body...</span>", meanwhile popcorning the olives and gargling vodka and just a whisp of dry vermouth and chambering one of his brand new 4000fps 95gr .260 loads in the Dancer and swinging his basilisk gaze toward Bubba; who dejectedly...
 
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..trudged away looking for the bubble headed bleach blonde from the hottest girlfriend contest.
 
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The next day, a foul smell hung over the Capitol. It didn't take long before before they tracked it down to the Jr. Senator from New York. When they opened her office door, they couldn't believe..........
 
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..that the North Korean U.N. delegation was serving up bowls of some very old cabbage and delivering 2008 Presidential Campaign donations in brown paper bags to a smiling....
 
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...mrs klinton. But with an even bigger grin on his fat face was micky moore, who was sitting in a tub filled with the cabbage. He had a half eaten family sized Round Table Combo pizza topped with an assortment of krispy kream's in one hand, and in the other he held............
 
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A personally autographed picture of the sta-puff marshmallow man and a condom fashioned from glad wrap filled with half eaten salad olives. All of a sudden, a loud popping sound is heard from..
 
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A small Coleman camp fire stove, which she had lit with one of those all-weather firestarter kits that one can find on the shelf next to canned Spam and spray on mosquito repellant, with fresh scent, in almost any Walmart or survival store, especially in the Midwest and some Central Southern areas like Blisterpop, Georgia, population 1349.5, of which, incidentally, her own grandmother’s cousin’s uncle’s wife’s sister’s friend spent nearly every winter in order to avoid the cruel and punishing harshness of their old pine log cabin near the Indian Gravehole fishing spot on the East Fork of the White Water River in the Upper Peninsula…
 
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...she was clearly in phase III of her "Lets look like a conservative to the morons program" and, in a violent, smelly phase 10 of what happens when you eat spam when she looked up to see...
 
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in a twisted (gawd awful) sexual knot that could make a turkey vulture vomit. At that very moment "Slick Willy" painted his target and said.......
 
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and then transformed into this fat kid doing a very wierd dance http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/206373 that would, in a very short while -say 1 week, 7 days, 19 hours, 42 minutes and 35 seconds,- take the entire world, by way of the internet, by storm, especially the suburbs of metropolitan cities with large universities with towers on them and a library of over 29,000 books written by the classical American writers like Fenimore Cooper and Hemingway, who, by the way, had a wierd interest in guns (remember the Short and Happy Life of Francis Macomber?) but this only served to piss off John Ashcroft, who was a sort of holier than thou, do as I say and not as I do type of fellow, compelling him to issue an edict to all American citizens making less than $100,000.00 annually, which said: