Maggie’s CONFUCIUS DIDN'T SAY

ssgp2

Sergeant
Full Member
Minuteman
May 9, 2004
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montreal,Canada
Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.
Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
Better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.
Squirrel who runs up woman’s' leg will not find nuts.
Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.
Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.
War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it.
Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fish in other man's pond often catch crabs.
Woman who fly plane upsidedown have crack up.
Man who goes to shrink should have head examined.
The bigger your mouth, the smarter you look when it's shut.
Learning to love yourself makes for weird sex.
Anything possible, when you don't know what you're talking about.
Lion will not cheat on wife, but Tiger Wood.
 
Re: CONFUCIUS DIDN'T SAY

Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.
Dumb man climb tree to get cherry, wise man spread limbs.
Don't drink and park - accidents cause people.
Baseball all wrong, man with four balls cannot walk.
House without toilet is uncanny.
Man trapped in brothel get jerked around.
Man's wife his better half, his mistress his better whole.
Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.
It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.
Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.
Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep shit.
Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner.
Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.
Wife not part of furniture, until screwed on bed.
Woman laid in tomb may soon become mummy.
Man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.
Man who jizz in cash register come into money.
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
Man who gets kicked in testicles left holding bag.
Don't sweat the petty stuff and don't pet the sweaty stuff.
Woman who wear jockstrap have make believe ballroom.
Woman who slides down banister makes monkey shine.
Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
Woman who puts detergent on top shelf, jump for Joy.
Naked man in Saran Wrap, clearly nuts.