What a complicated subject!
Unfortunately many families are damaged from sin so bad, maybe even generationally cursed, that if we/I were married into that family, or in the men's case/our case, that there is little hope of having a successful marriage.
I was that guy. I met my first wife in church but I was too young and dumb/ignorant to see the warning signs and thought no matter what that God could help us work things out.
My FIL was a nice old fart however still a little strange but my MIL was a psycho as I found out later on. Being Polish my FIL had sponsored his wife, my MIL, from the old country/Poland, and her mother and father to the USA.
Keeping it short he literally called her the devil because she caused him constant grief. He hated her. This devil's husband built himself a room in the basement and locked himself in there, rarely coming out, to avoid the crazy bitch. I'm not kidding.
Their daughter, my wife, put on a front while we were engaged which was somewhat of a trick, and shortly after getting married she started getting weird.
Only a few months later she left for 3 weeks to visit her dad which became a pattern in her life which was leaving/traveling as much as she could get away with.
She became the most narcissistic person I've ever known and by that I mean nobody has come even close to her to this day. I could go on for days telling all kinds of bizarre stories.
I was in my mind married for life and trying to keep the family together because we had three kids. I tried and there was no fixing it.
The last straw for me was when she had an affair with my best friend 'at that time'. One week I was sleeping in my bed and two weeks later I was knocking on the door of my own house to pick up my kids. Just like that I was substituted for another. It was devastating! Only God helped me through this trial because the pain and anger was almost too much. I eventually forgave her and him by the Grace of God!
Just a few stories;
When my ex and my ex friend were gone I went to the house to finish picking up the remaining tools for work. On the back porch my old FIL who the ex was taking care of because of dimensia(and BTW stealing his money too) saw me, and began to sob apologizing to me about his crazy daughters behavior and said he missed me. That was so sad and I felt bad for him being stuck in that situation. He hated adultery because his ex, my ex's mother, had committed adultery on him which he was never able to forgive her for.
She got power of attorney, he died, and she absconded/stole her siblings inheritance.
That's not all, there's more, JK, but there seriously was a lot more and it's been never ending.
Anyway my 2nd wife of 20 years has been the best wife ever. I couldn't have found a nicer one and I say that with all my heart! She's a saint and a lovely person.
She had a nice mother and father too and was taught how a woman should act as well as being a strong believer in God.
We've never even been in an argument, are best friends, and it will be more painful for me if she dies first than the ex ever caused.
I love you Robin!!!!!