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Transplant from Oregon... You don't say????
- The Bear Pit
- 12 Replies
Game Wardens with Texas Parks and Wildlife arrested Ethan McNeely, a 39 year old Oregon transplant, yesterday after discovering him crouched in the woods below the dam at Lake Tawakoni attempting to hunt squirrels with nothing but his bare hands and teeth.
McNeely, who insists he’s “a primal predator, not a sportsman,” argued with officers that his “God-given claws and fangs” exempt him from needing a hunting license. “If I catch it with my molars, that’s between me and Mother Nature,” he reportedly told wardens while spitting out a mouthful of bark.
Authorities were not convinced. TPWD officials say that while McNeely’s hunting technique is unique, state law doesn’t make exceptions for “wannabe cavemen.” He was booked on charges of hunting without a license and disorderly conduct after growling at the officers.
McNeely maintains he’s being persecuted. “They can cage me,” he said, “but they’ll never cage my inner wolf!”
I think his 'inner wolf' is actually a Chihuahua with a severe crack problem. But I could be wrong!
Sirhr
PS. Please let this be satire. Because holy hell, my faith in humanity just can't get any lower. If this thing can be considered humanity...
McNeely, who insists he’s “a primal predator, not a sportsman,” argued with officers that his “God-given claws and fangs” exempt him from needing a hunting license. “If I catch it with my molars, that’s between me and Mother Nature,” he reportedly told wardens while spitting out a mouthful of bark.
Authorities were not convinced. TPWD officials say that while McNeely’s hunting technique is unique, state law doesn’t make exceptions for “wannabe cavemen.” He was booked on charges of hunting without a license and disorderly conduct after growling at the officers.
McNeely maintains he’s being persecuted. “They can cage me,” he said, “but they’ll never cage my inner wolf!”
I think his 'inner wolf' is actually a Chihuahua with a severe crack problem. But I could be wrong!
Sirhr
PS. Please let this be satire. Because holy hell, my faith in humanity just can't get any lower. If this thing can be considered humanity...
Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)
- By EddieNFL
- The Bear Pit
- 121309 Replies
That's why we practice transition drills to folding chairs.
