Time to play How Fucked am I
- Thread starter Alphatreedog
- Start date
If I said Obama was the first black president, is that racist? Isn't it a fact? I heard that statement all the time.These were people that would swear they aren't racist. They didn't have to pick a color. Never once did I tell them they were racist. It didn't offend me that they said he was black.
but this should be about the health and welfare of Alpha and his peeps
Couple short stories: HOG brother of mine who is now an addiction counselor went through this with his son, no matter how many times he bailed him out and got him treatment, son still couldn't shake the heroin and is now locked up for 15 years for B&E. Niece of ours, started with weed, got a DUI in Texas, failed at her probation and got locked up for a spell, went right back at her old ways once she got out with old friends and boyfriend who got her even more strung out, Nurse Practitioner mother of hers finally had enough and gave her the clean up on my dime or live on the streets with your junkie friends and ultimatum, she left home the next day. I don't need to tell you it's a vicious cycle, and there's failures in it all around us. I bet everyone reading this has at least one story of their own.
Short term: I'd get my firearms off the property save one that stays on my hip at all times. On probation, they don't need a warrant to search a property, and while they can typically only search those areas where your daughter has access to, I'm sure you don't want the legal hassle if they decide to go elsewhere. Probation officers have a lot of authority, and as your daughter is currently inside the legal system, she has already forfeited her rights. Unfortunately, that includes your rights as well since she's in your home. I'd personally speak directly with the probation officer, remember you're on the same team as they are to get your daughter back in the good graces with society, and they will tell you what local laws govern this and what the both of you need to do to stay out of a court room.
Longer term: Speak with her counselor if you can attend a treatment team meeting and discuss what may be actually best for her, but her being an adult may prevent your direct involvement without your daughter's approval. My wife is a counselor, there's times she recommends residential but the court doesn't go to that extent (it costs them a lot of money) if the judge and their law degree seems to believe they know more about addiction than someone with a Ph.D and two Masters in mental health. But, if your daughter is still on your insurance, and most insurance plans now cover residential substance abuse treatment, you may very well be able to go that route and get her not only the substance abuse treatment but focused treatment for her other issues as well at the same time. Pulling someone out of their addictive environment in its entirety is the only thing that helps them on the road to recovery.
When all else fails, I feel for you but I would make the same call to send her on the way to sink or swim. That in of itself is often the kick in the ass to do something right. I'm sure you've been a great provider for her over her years, just as I've always tried to be myself. But my wife and I also have a firmly established "I'm not bailing you out so don't bother calling from jail" policy with all our kids, and it's sadly been enforced too. They right themselves, eventually, as we've also been lucky and haven't had "that call" either.
Best wishes for your family.
Short term: I'd get my firearms off the property save one that stays on my hip at all times. On probation, they don't need a warrant to search a property, and while they can typically only search those areas where your daughter has access to, I'm sure you don't want the legal hassle if they decide to go elsewhere. Probation officers have a lot of authority, and as your daughter is currently inside the legal system, she has already forfeited her rights. Unfortunately, that includes your rights as well since she's in your home. I'd personally speak directly with the probation officer, remember you're on the same team as they are to get your daughter back in the good graces with society, and they will tell you what local laws govern this and what the both of you need to do to stay out of a court room.
Longer term: Speak with her counselor if you can attend a treatment team meeting and discuss what may be actually best for her, but her being an adult may prevent your direct involvement without your daughter's approval. My wife is a counselor, there's times she recommends residential but the court doesn't go to that extent (it costs them a lot of money) if the judge and their law degree seems to believe they know more about addiction than someone with a Ph.D and two Masters in mental health. But, if your daughter is still on your insurance, and most insurance plans now cover residential substance abuse treatment, you may very well be able to go that route and get her not only the substance abuse treatment but focused treatment for her other issues as well at the same time. Pulling someone out of their addictive environment in its entirety is the only thing that helps them on the road to recovery.
When all else fails, I feel for you but I would make the same call to send her on the way to sink or swim. That in of itself is often the kick in the ass to do something right. I'm sure you've been a great provider for her over her years, just as I've always tried to be myself. But my wife and I also have a firmly established "I'm not bailing you out so don't bother calling from jail" policy with all our kids, and it's sadly been enforced too. They right themselves, eventually, as we've also been lucky and haven't had "that call" either.
Best wishes for your family.
Probation Officer comea out tomorrow . I spoke with two lawyers ( thanks Veer)
and it does not look good . Man I swear I feel like a Dead Man walkin .
and it does not look good . Man I swear I feel like a Dead Man walkin .
You're welcome. Just wish that I could have done more for you.
I have prayed without it and it would be nice to have. I usually asked and forgot this time.
I figure God knows what we are talkin about. He knows all right? I think that spans many faith beliefs.
I figure God knows what we are talkin about. He knows all right? I think that spans many faith beliefs.
Thanks . Spent the day cleaning and slathering everything in grease just in case .
Got a buddy stoppon by to grab most of my ammo . Don't want to end up on six oclock news as a follower of Army Jerry .
Prayers sent for your entire family. Man I feel for you and your loved ones. ??????
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Wooo Hooo Yeyahhhh . PO ok'd the firearms . I furnished a Police report citing need for protection and told the PO that daughter has no access . Firearms are locked up . Thank you Heavenly Father . And thank all you guys for your reaponses and support . Even the tough Love ones . The only negative is I think my buddy got a hernia helping me move the ammo . ?
Just make sure it’s in writing. Good to hear though, best wishes in getting your daughter and the rest of your family through all this.
Q
QuickNDirty
Guest
See, told you...
Seriously though, I'm very glad that part of the process worked out. Now ya gotta stay on it and make sure she doesn't fail a piss test.
Got video with sound . And QnD , We will be proactive and she will either seize the opportunity or face jail . No money unless task oriented . No rides unless to work .
Near identical situation for myself, I was 20 a month from my birthday. Dad said he'll pay for rehab once and sent me on my way. Never moved back home after the day I left, Got a job at Sears then joined the union and now 7 years later I have my own house and a paid off truck.
Best thing my parents ever did for me, was to make me grow up "sink or swim" style.
It sucked for a while, but now looking back I'm grateful and proud of where I've come from.
Best thing my parents ever did for me, was to make me grow up "sink or swim" style.
It sucked for a while, but now looking back I'm grateful and proud of where I've come from.
