Chick-fil-a is garbage. Change my mind.

TheGerman

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  • Jan 25, 2010
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    And I'm not even going to bring their faggot cuck of a bitch ass CEO who I would simply walk by, punch in the dick, and keep walking, if I ever saw.

    All fast food, and most restaurant food is just fucking awful in general; but Chick Fil A is just fucking garbage.

    That chicken sandwich, their flagship thing, is horrible. The outside is like its heavily panko breaded and hard (and either cold, or 1670 degrees) yet the meat inside is always a total different temperature as well as a completely different texture. It's like biting into a fucking jelly filled gobstopper that is then abrasive on your tongue and mouth as you fucking eat it. It's also always a weird fucking lumpy shape and you can feel the pasted together chicken meat trying to come apart in sections while attempting to eat this thing; I'm under the impression the weird 'hard' coating to it isn't there for flavor/texture/whatever, but instead to encapsulate the gross solid meat paste art project inside that also has a chance of greeting you with water when you bite into it and I can only guess has about the same texture as swallowing horse jizz. I wouldn't know, but we can definetly get a confirmation of this once we ask @Bigfatcock.

    To top that off, the fucking space blanket wrapper they put it in not only doesn't fucking do anything because the free slave labor white mormon kids who work there for free on their Mission don't ever actually fucking close it, but it still manages to trap juuuuuuuussst enough of the heat from overcooking the shit out of the 'breaded' meat paste patty in it to ensure that the pathetically boring bun they put on this thing is completely fucking damp, soggy and looks like someone stepped on it on purpose. Yum.

    You're gross chicken sandwich. Go home. I'm not even going to even mention your poor attempt at fries because I don't think Frank has enough bandwith for me to outline just how fucking ashamed of yourselves you need to be.

    Everything else on the menu is some other rendition of this shitty sandwich or some pathetically anorexic chicken tenders that lack anything resembeling flavor that there should be an actual law passed that you are required to receive 2 dipping sauces per chicken tender.

    Fuck, even their dipping sauces are fucking lame. How do you fuck up what BBQ sauce tastes like? How is this fucking even possible? I mean, their entire sauce selection line up is about as exciting as Mitt Romney's senior class pictures, but holy fuck people.

    Finally, have you ever been to a Chick fil a and didn't have to wait like you were at the fucking DMV? The lines you see coming out of the drive thrus aren't due to popular demand as people would think, no, its from people still waiting for breakfast at fucking lunch time.

    Oh, and that sandwich/'fries'/drink meal is like 1300 calories or some shit, you bunch of fucking fatasses.

    Fight me.




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    TheGerman

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    If you said all this to the person in the window, all you would get back is..

    "My pleasure"

    Its young Ned Flanders up in there.

    I did call them about what a cuck bitch their CEO was and got the 'usual' generalized apology bullshit that means nothing. I'm also pretty sure the chick took a personal day and went to confession after she hung up.
     

    kenny1773

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    I don't know what happened to Chick fil a, I agree their CEO is a cuck piece of shit
    but their food was once decent for fast food (over a decade ago) and has really gone downhill

    I prefer a popeyes chicken sandwhich (but I have had some bad ones here and there, still batting 90% on good ones)

    Chick fil a is like cult following, people that are in the cult will eat it no matter what and love it no matter what

    Chick fil a is not my go to place ever, but sometimes the kids make me go there :(
     
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    TheGerman

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    I don't know what happened to Chick fil a, I agree their CEO is a cuck piece of shit
    but their food was once decent for fast food (over a decade ago) and has really gone downhill

    I prefer a popeyes chicken sandwhich (but I have had some bad ones here and there, still batting 90% on good ones)

    Chick fil a is like cult following, people that are in the cult will eat it no matter what and love it no matter what

    Chick fil a is not my go to place ever, but sometimes the kids make me go there :(

    I mean, you can always just.....sell your kids, right?
     

    jbell

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    I Will NOT eat fast food, moderate speed food, and most slow foods that I have to "order". However that being said I have been called a food Nazi by most people who know me, at which time I correct them in that I'm a nutrition Nazi. As far as I know I only have 1 go at this life and I only have 1 body in which to experience it with. How people fuck this up is beyond me, I have ZERO sympathy for someone who eats themselves into a bad situation especially those who are not willing to accept 100% responsibility for it.

    Shit, what were we talking about again?...
     

    TheGerman

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    I never eat there because the line is always so long.

    From what I've seen, they tend to put them in strip mall parking lots or seperate lots right off a main road. They then make it to where if there are more than 4-5 cars in the fucking drivethru, they block all of the cars in parking spots as well as force everyone onto an intersection or onto the main road.

    Whoever designs their layouts as far as drive thru and placement needs to be shot in the face.
     

    MtnCreek

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    They used to have a chicken salad sandwich that was pretty good. I like the fries. The one's around here move people through the drivethrough fast.
     

    TheGerman

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    I Will NOT eat fast food, moderate speed food, and most slow foods that I have to "order". However that being said I have been called a food Nazi by most people who know me, at which time I correct them in that I'm a nutrition Nazi. As far as I know I only have 1 go at this life and I only have 1 body in which to experience it with. How people fuck this up is beyond me, I have ZERO sympathy for someone who eats themselves into a bad situation especially those who are not willing to accept 100% responsibility for it.

    Shit, what were we talking about again?...

    1607370264071.png
     

    M8541Reaper

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  • Jul 23, 2011
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    I dont even know what this is, but I'm sure you have to wait 4 hours in the parking lot drive thru line to finally get it.
    4.5hrs before you reach the bench where you actually can place the order with the hired help. Those poor fucks...standing outside in the AZ heat in the dead of summer taking order after order.

    The Chick-N-Minis are a breakfast item they have where it’s a chicken nugget nestled inside of some mini bao bun-style piece of bread. They are worth committing war crimes over when doing a road trip.

    Side Note:
    Whoever opens a CFA franchise in Sierra Vista, AZ will become just as rich as the dude who owns the hot dog/coffee truck on Stone Bay.
    #ProTip
     

    TheGerman

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    4.5hrs before you reach the bench where you actually can place the order with the hired help. Those poor fucks...standing outside in the AZ heat in the dead of summer taking order after order.

    The Chick-N-Minis are a breakfast item they have where it’s a chicken nugget nestled inside of some mini bao bun-style piece of bread. They are worth committing war crimes over when doing a road trip.

    Side Note:
    Whoever opens a CFA franchise in Sierra Vista, AZ will become just as rich as the dude who owns the hot dog/coffee truck on Stone Bay.
    #ProTip

    Lets open one and basically not pay attention to any of the corporate tards. Like, we'll never answer the phone, not have active email accounts and noone will know what we look like.

    We'll also be the 'mean' Chick fil a.
     

    TheGerman

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    Bro I'm a fucking retard, can you bust out the crayons and explain what you mean? Or is it just my Nazi references?

    lol its better when its animated.

    If you've never seen it, its a joke where that player says something to the ref or someone during the game and lip reading it looks EXACTLY like he said 'the jews did this'. He speaks Portuguese so he didn't say it, but its been a meme forever.

    With you having said nutrition nazi a few times and complaining about things, I was just saying....maybe the jews did it all!


     

    Mwalex

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    I use to enjoy CFA and they had the nicest staff of any fast food chain. BUT after the CEO pulled that bullshit with BLM I am done with them and they will not get any more of my money, no matter how much it pains me.
     

    Supersubes

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    Looking at the lines can be somewhat demoralizing, but they fucking crank like in-n-out does. Fast food is all varying degrees of not so good, chic’s sammys are ok.

    @TheGerman have you noticed the people inside? Customers and employees are usually pretty good people. Going in there on duty is a totally different experience from most other fast food joints in my experience. Another data point. When the gay community got all snowflake on them, the customers took it upon themselves to buy buy buy, which is the adult way to say “fuck you” to snowflakes. Pretty impressive.
    F549286E-A2F7-4C3A-87D9-302CCE5439B2.jpegD0C0048C-2536-4760-B2BE-7935982CC47A.jpeg
     

    hlee

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    Chic-fil-a is the only restaurant chain in the area with service that is worth a tinker’s damn. I swear to god they have to be importing labor from wherever they grow kids that give a fuck, because they aren’t indigenous to the area. The CFAs around here move customers through the line inside/curbside/drive through like it’s a fucking olympic event. I don’t know what they're serving in SLC, but it’s an honest to god cut of real white meat chicken here. Maybe you’re getting McNuggets on a bun instead. We don’t eat there very often, but if I need to get in and out, they are the go to. I read that shit about the ceo and had a wtf moment too, but I had forgotten about it until this thread. Speaking of in and out... Whatever they are cooking into/onto/near the spicy chicken bisquit is good for producing an award winning ”constitutional.” Take that for what it is worth.
     

    MtnCreek

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    The CEO sucks. No argument there.

    The chain operates like a swiss watch though and the chicken is better than the rest of major fast food chains. Anyone who says otherwise is lying. Who makes a better chicken sandwich in less than 2 minutes?
    Not a sandwich, but Jack's makes the best fastfood chicken. Served with a pretty good biscuit, green beans and mashed taters.
     

    CMP70306

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    Damn tell us how you really feel, honestly though I can only speak for my direct area but the Chick-Fil-A that we go to is way better than the surrounding fast food places. When 4 fast food places and 3 restaurants on the same road are relatively empty but Chick-Fil-A is mobbed consistently everyday but Sunday then it’s safe to say that their food is at least better than average.

    At least it’s consistently better than the Perdue chicken I’ve been getting lately, I can’t seem to find a pack that doesn’t have at least one piece of rubber chicken in it.
     

    Bigfatcock

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    Chik-fil a has the worst fast food chicken. Wished I’d have worked there as a teenager though since the ladies are of higher quality than the McDonald’s and Burger King skanks I was pulling back in the day.
     

    Sean the Nailer

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    I remember years ago, about how great people here thought Starbucks was, with them supporting 2A, and the "I love guns 'n coffee" patches and everything. My, how times have changed....

    I'm just sayin'.
     

    jbell

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    lol its better when its animated.

    If you've never seen it, its a joke where that player says something to the ref or someone during the game and lip reading it looks EXACTLY like he said 'the jews did this'. He speaks Portuguese so he didn't say it, but its been a meme forever.

    With you having said nutrition nazi a few times and complaining about things, I was just saying....maybe the jews did it all!



    That's hilarious!
     

    Aries256

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    No
    And I'm not even going to bring their faggot cuck of a bitch ass CEO who I would simply walk by, punch in the dick, and keep walking, if I ever saw.

    All fast food, and most restaurant food is just fucking awful in general; but Chick Fil A is just fucking garbage.

    That chicken sandwich, their flagship thing, is horrible. The outside is like its heavily panko breaded and hard (and either cold, or 1670 degrees) yet the meat inside is always a total different temperature as well as a completely different texture. It's like biting into a fucking jelly filled gobstopper that is then abrasive on your tongue and mouth as you fucking eat it. It's also always a weird fucking lumpy shape and you can feel the pasted together chicken meat trying to come apart in sections while attempting to eat this thing; I'm under the impression the weird 'hard' coating to it isn't there for flavor/texture/whatever, but instead to encapsulate the gross solid meat paste art project inside that also has a chance of greeting you with water when you bite into it and I can only guess has about the same texture as swallowing horse jizz. I wouldn't know, but we can definetly get a confirmation of this once we ask @Bigfatcock.

    To top that off, the fucking space blanket wrapper they put it in not only doesn't fucking do anything because the free slave labor white mormon kids who work there for free on their Mission don't ever actually fucking close it, but it still manages to trap juuuuuuuussst enough of the heat from overcooking the shit out of the 'breaded' meat paste patty in it to ensure that the pathetically boring bun they put on this thing is completely fucking damp, soggy and looks like someone stepped on it on purpose. Yum.

    You're gross chicken sandwich. Go home. I'm not even going to even mention your poor attempt at fries because I don't think Frank has enough bandwith for me to outline just how fucking ashamed of yourselves you need to be.

    Everything else on the menu is some other rendition of this shitty sandwich or some pathetically anorexic chicken tenders that lack anything resembeling flavor that there should be an actual law passed that you are required to receive 2 dipping sauces per chicken tender.

    Fuck, even their dipping sauces are fucking lame. How do you fuck up what BBQ sauce tastes like? How is this fucking even possible? I mean, their entire sauce selection line up is about as exciting as Mitt Romney's senior class pictures, but holy fuck people.

    Finally, have you ever been to a Chick fil a and didn't have to wait like you were at the fucking DMV? The lines you see coming out of the drive thrus aren't due to popular demand as people would think, no, its from people still waiting for breakfast at fucking lunch time.

    Oh, and that sandwich/'fries'/drink meal is like 1300 calories or some shit, you bunch of fucking fatasses.

    Fight me.
    No argument from me. Saltiest, nastiest sammich Ive had, besides the chicken sammich from the vending machine at work, tho Id rather have the vending machine one, because at least its cheaper for nearly the same low quality taste.
     

    Threadcutter308

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    I tried CFA once, in Palo Alto. I finally succumbed to the hype and decided to see for myself. Fucking Swanson dinners in the frozen section have more flavor than that cardboard mess they serve. Not sure if I even finished it. Couldn't believe that there were so many fanbois of that junk.

    Fast forward a couple two or three years. Figured "WTF" and gave it another go. They had not improved their cardboard one bit.

    Disclosure; I tried Popeye's in Fremont, CA. Jeebuz, I didn't know that you could dry out/shrivel up chicken like that........

    I'm not a fast food chicken connoisseur by any means, evidenced by the fact that the "best" (relative term) fast food chicken that I have had has been KFC. Can't say that I rave about it, but it's always been juicy, tender and well seasoned.
     
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    Aries256

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    I remember years ago, about how great people here thought Starbucks was, with them supporting 2A, and the "I love guns 'n coffee" patches and everything. My, how times have changed....

    I'm just sayin'.
    Starbucks always was overpriced, over hyped shit, lol kinda like chik-fil-a. In and out isnt worth the hype, wait nor price either. Habit blows them out of the water flavor wise for a overpriced burger.
     

    Jefe's Dope

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    Just ate some Chick-Fil-a. Drove right up to the speaker and ordered. Took about three minutes to get through. But I went at 2:15pm. During normal eating hours, it's a fucking mess and I don't blame you.

    You're right about the fries too. They are shit. But I suffer through them 'cause I actually think the chicken is pretty decent. But that's about the end of our disagreements about Chick-Fil-A. Pretty spot on I'd say. I'll probably eat it three more times this week though. 😁
     

    Ric O'shay

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    My city is behind on pretty much everything. We are still confused by round-abouts. Therefore we do not have a C.F. We recently got a Popeyes but all the fatties are lined up for blocks, so it's a hard pass for me.
     

    alwaywatchyoursix

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    I ate Chick-Fil-A for the first time in Georgia in 2004. I thought it was really good. Only went a couple times but always thought it was delicious.

    Fast forward to a 2015, and Chick-Fil-A came to my part of California. Went by one day a few months after they had been open, and WOW it was horrible. Never going there again. Either something major changed in that decade, or the state rules for food here are drastically different than they are in Georgia, but it is definitely not the same chicken sandwich I had way back then.