Re: do You Spank Your Kids
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: maggot</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I had a psychotic mother who used to abuse andbeat me all the time for nothing. Dad was gone three weeks at a time so he couldnt see what was going on. When he got home she would lie and tell him what a rotten little monster I was and then he would beat me. All it made me do was hate her miserable ass and become a mean violent little son of a bitch. Im lucky I survived. Fortuunately I had a couple of other GOOD role models which helped a lot. Fuck that shit. Thanks primarily to her abuse I never had any kids but if I did and if anyone ever laid a hand on my kid they would be a dead son of a bitch.
Personally Im against corporal punishment. There are better ways. If yu spend the time to teach them the right way, you wont have to waste the time beating them.
Flame on, motherfuckers. </div></div>
No flames. What you went through IS child abuse. There is a difference. I'm almost an antique now and I vividly remember the only time I got the belt. I got smacked on the arm by my grandmother (I was adopted by my maternal grandparents) with a metal spatula for doing something when I was 5 or 6. And I did do it, but decided I wanted payback.
Waited in the basement for my grandfather to get home from work. He asked what was wrong, I said I got hit for nothing. He flew up the stairs, they argued for a minute until he figured I was lying. That's when I got the belt. I can tell you this, I never lied to that man again. Did I deserve it? Hell yes. Did I have any bruises or marks? Don't know, but I learned my lesson.
And FYI, the worst thing my grandmother ever did was get one moving violation her entire life. My maternal great grandparents came through Ellis Island in 1912. They disciplined their 3 kids with a cat o' nine tails. So a smack on the arm with a spatula was a quantum leap forward from someone who'd essentially been whipped as a child.
Fast forward. I always wished I'd grew up on a farm instead of what I had as a kid. When I finally found out who my real father was I researched him via internet. Guess what I found out? He was a farmer and he damn near single-handed the end of corporal punishment at home. One of my half-brothers got beat so bad with a belt by him that he couldn't sit in his chair at school and he was covered with bruises and cuts. Teacher sent him to the school nurse and they were like wtf? Seems my biological father had a bad habit of getting drunk and handing out beatings.
To make matters worse, after he beat the kid THAT time, he turned around and beat him again a few days later (drunk again most likely) because the kid was a "rat". I can only imagine what would've happened to me if my mother would've ended up with him.
My daughter might've gotten some swats on her butt when she was still in diapers. Mainly for getting into things she wasn't supposed to be touching that could hurt her. I really can't see it doing much good after they've gone into kindergarten.
YOU, as a parent should've taught your child right and wrong by then. You can't legislate good parenting by saying you can't spank, etc. The law ought to be able to tell the difference between too much force for a spanking and when somebody is being used as a human ashtray, as in a history of abuse, not an incident.
A friend spanked his 15 y/o daughter with his belt. Why? She'd been suspended from high school for smoking cigarettes in the BOYS bathroom. Unfortunately, he put a mark/bruise whatever on her thigh and he was invited "downtown" by the locals to talk about it. He was immediately arrested.
You define whether that was abuse. And btw, both his kids were "gone wild" and had just been recently been dumped upon him by his ex-wife as she could no longer handle them. Parents can be convicted of neglect when they can't control their kids and have been arrested for chaining them to keep them from sneaking out at night.
The laws suck and nobody seems to give a crap about changing them. It's a brave new PC touchy/feely world.
